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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
I was at the tournament for two days. My report is ridiculously long so if you just want to know about free stuff skip to the end.

TUESDAY

I took my brother (25) and niece (12). Brother paid so I was instructed to scout for "Hot Chick Matches."

At the ticket tent there were signs for two separate types of lines: "Normal People" and "Groups of Idiots Who Take 5 Minutes At The Window." Sorry, that was a daydream I was having, so we missed the first set...

KRASNOROUTSKAYA d. DANIILIDOU in 3 sets:

Daniilidou is a really entertaining athlete to watch, she can really scramble and won a lot of great rallies. In general Krasnoroutskaya seemed to have the stronger groundstrokes, which surprised me. Daniilidou DFed near the end on a serve so tight it was worthy of me.

Brother's Comment: D: Not my type, K: Stubby legs.

Niece Comment: They play better than you, Aunt Sam.

DOKIC d. WIDJAJA

The-wait-and-see-if-Jelena-can-be-bothered-to-hit-a-spectacular-winner-match.

TV doesn't do justice to how hard and flat Dokic can strike -- the ball seems to skid a foot when it lands. TV sound equipment doesn't do justice to her airy "whoosh" grunt.

She doesn't give a damn if she steps on the lines.

Brother: Oh My God! This was a great idea!

Niece: Pretty!

BOVINA d. SANCHEZ LORENZO

Bovina was having no problem. We left when the rain started. I still don't understand why she hasn't had more success, I guess her strokes aren't smooth enough?...but boy she moves well and keeps charging in.

Seems to be on the same perpetual Russian sugar high as Sharapova, shaking her legs throughout changeovers.

She was a bit high-maintenance with the water bottle boy but I saw no evidence of actual bitchiness.

She's five pounds from eating disorder rumours.

Brother: Why haven't I heard of her?! Those legs are (he talked for 5 minutes about her legs).

Niece: I want to be that tall.

NOTE TO TOURNAMENT ORGANIZERS: The blue court makes all the coppertoned blonds look jaundiced.

Okay, so it started raining and I'm going to segue into telling you how to get free stuff. It's important that you read this because at the very end of the post I'm going to write some nonsense to screw the jerks who didn't bother reading the tennis stuff.

During a rain break...chat up the volunteers! Turns out they all get free tickets and some, out of the blue, give them to you. They love to talk about their jobs and dish about players. Target middle-aged men -- they are more likely to A) be lonelier and B) have fewer friends who don't have jobs. You don't have to be female for this to work -- we split up and my brother says bonding over the (insert one of the Barbie's names)-is-hotter-than-Kournikova discussion works as well as innocent-female tack.

Now, the fact that we both separately scored tickets WITHOUT PLANNING IT IN ADVANCE suggests that innocence of intentions and genuine personableness are assets that will provide you with a distinct advantage over cynical, trawling-for-free-stuff approach, so basically my writing this thread may have unintentionally screwed you -- but not as much as I'm going to screw the jerks who only read the end.

WEDNESDAY (FREE DAY!)

Brother couldn't come so I took a friend who actually knows a lot about tennis...

HANTUCHOVA d. CRAYBAS

The-let's-watch-Dani-tee-off-on-Craybas's-weak-shit match. Dani tried to choke but Jill kept giving life support.

Set point: easiest overhead smash in the history of tennis, Dani is two feet from the net and Jill is off the court. Dani hits it off the top of the frame and ball arcs way up and into the stands. Stadium gasps and Dani looks like she is going to die.

When Hantuchova makes a mistake she looks like a silent movie actress in total despair -- even when she's way ahead.

She didn't look quite as gaunt as I expected; I was relieved to hear my niece say she thought Dani was too thin, I was nervous about that.

Her serve was great; her shots were perfectly placed but didn't have much sting. Hit her hardest serve on match point (163k).

Niece: Elf princess! (This actually became an annoying obsession of my niece, how Dani should've been in Lord of the Rings)

HENIN-HARDENNE d. BARTOLI

H-H is amazing. Bartoli is fun to watch but doesn't do anything as well as H-H.

We left in the 2nd set to go to the small courts because we wanted to see a tight match.

NAVRATILOVA seems to be earning her appearance fees by practicing on Court 4, and drawing crowds.

PETROVA d. RUANO-PASCUAL

AMAZING MATCH!!!

My friend persuaded us to skip the end of the H-H/Bartoli blowout and see Petrova's arms vs. R-P's legs.

We got to the bleachers and my friend whispered, "Ooooh, this is going to be awesome!" and sat us down near Petrova's family and (young) coach, telling us to keep an eye on him.

They split the first two sets. Amazing rallies with R-P chasing down everything. She must've gotten tired because she took a "uniform" break after winning the 2nd set and took WAY longer than five minutes.

You could tell that Pet (along with the crowd) was getting pissed but she didn't do or say anything...

Pet's coach had yelled out "NO CHANGE" to her. He was often whistling to get her attention and signalling her (subtly). Occasionally she would glance at him, then rub her fingers on the hem of her skirt. The Ref didn't notice/didn't care. The coach's (Mom briefly joined in too) subtle signals became a bit more emphatic as the match progressed.

Pet was getting pissed that she couldn't put R-P down and after losing a game she tried to lob a ball to a ball boy on the far side of the court...but she hit it so hard it sailed over the fence and out onto the highway. That made her shake her head and laugh. She relaxed and played better.

Pet broke and served for the match: three double faults. 5-5 in the 3rd.

Now Pet's coach was pissed...

He whistled and signalled. He'd been getting vocal in the 3rd but it was all innocuous "come on"s and "perfect"s...

Pet lost a long baseline rally and was returning serve, standing 15 ft. from her coach...

COACH: Move forward!!!

Pet (without looking at him; very well done) rubbed her fingers on the hem of her skirt near where her thigh was wrapped.

COACH: I DON'T CARE!!! MOVE FORWARD!!!

She didn't.

In the tie-break the coach left the stands and stood with the crowd at the low fence beside the court, mere feet from Pet but she didn't see him or avoided eye contact.

Pet became serve goddess in the tie-break and won.

She was really good with the fans afterwards, taking a long time for signings and photos.

Niece: Scary coach.

Players for a doubles match came on court really quickly...

HANTUCHOVA-HUSAROVA d. MOLIK-SERNA

Well, the Dani-show again. Serna sucked. Husarova was amazing, she kept hitting lob winners.

Dani also feels silent-movie despair when she makes ANY mistakes in doubles, even when her team is way ahead. At one point she won a cheap point by clipping the net cord and she did the standard hand-apology to Molik but it made me laugh because from the look on her face it seemed like she actually was really, really sorry!

All four players were relaxed and laughing but the Slovaks were rolling until they both decided to suck when trying to close the match. Dani eventually served it out.

We looked out for coaches and spotted Hantuchova's sitting with her mother and Barbara Schett but we were too chicken to move way over and eavesdrop.

They did walk out behind us and the coach and Schett seemed to be negotiating a playing contract, I heard Schett say something like, "Okay, for you, I'll do it...mutter, mutter...'cause right now I have nobody...mutter, mutter...maybe 50% of the time."

I couldn't resist mentioning that because it was 100% vague and should drive Dani-fanatics insane with speculation.

HOW TO GET FREE STUFF

In Toronto, near the north entrance to Court 2, there's a stern-looking woman volunteer, stocky and with a blond dye job -- don't be afraid, that is my Aunt Mary, she is actually really friendly and a lot of laughs.

Walk up, hug her, and say, "Aunt Mary, I want free tickets."

She is expecting people but get to her early because she has only two spare tickets per day.
 

· SMUstang,
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great post

if bovina wins on thursday you have to tell your aunt to save the tickets for leena ..bovina hasnt made a QF all year and she has to see her hero play
 

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damn you Samantha, when we approached the volunteers for questions and general help they just gave us these telling looks of "shouldn't you young'ns be causing some ruckus somewhere right now? Don't bother our guests!" We just avoided them for the rest of the day. :mad:
 

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"They split the first two sets. Amazing rallies with R-P chasing down everything. She must've gotten tired because she took a "uniform" break after winning the 2nd set and took WAY longer than five minutes."

Gosh! She must have been tired. :eek: The one thing that really impressed me, (aside form the great tennis being played), about Vivi's three hour loss to Sugiyama at RG was that neither player took a break. The heat was stifling, (we were dying sitting in the stands wondering how the hell the players could manage to move, let alone run!), and both players were absolutely exhausted in the third set, so much so that we were just waiting for one of them to take a break....by the end Vivi could barely stand let alone play tennis, but neither one of them took a break.

As for the time factor, I'm beginning to think she has no concept of time! We thought she was going to be defaulted from Wimbledon last year when it took about 15 mins. and several calls by the umpire before she arrived for her first round match, (which was to be played on a court about 3 mins walk from the players area). We started taking bets after that on how late she or she and Paola, (in dubs), would be for their matches! :p


"HANTUCHOVA-HUSAROVA d. MOLIK-SERNA

Well, the Dani-show again. Serna sucked. Husarova was amazing, she kept hitting lob winners."

lol! Poor Magui, I don't think doubles ever will be her thing!! I'm sure she was trying though, bless!! :p Was she trying to hit every ball herself and hitting Alicia all the time, as usual?!?! ;) How I love watching Magui pay dubs!! :p

Thanks for the report!! :D :worship:
 

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I was there watching all the matches you watched. Everyone stayed to watch hantuchova play her doubles match (just to get something signed) because the match was rather un-eventful...Hantuchova just signed three balls and a hat I think :( . Petrova was really nice (I stood 2 feet away) she was one of the few player to speak to her fans and not just 'ignore them'

One question...If she is injured...why the hell did she play doubles later in the night?
 

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That was a great report! I loved it!
I don't know why Lena doesn't have a huge following either. She's unique among tennis players.
I think if IMG would have grabbed her in 2001, she would be their first priority.
And great Nadia stuff too!
 

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martamagica said:
Lena had mononucleosis, and she lost over 20 pounds because of it.

Don't make remarks like that about her again, because I will stick up my foot up your fucking ass if you do again. Thanks.
WOW, calm down...... calm down. It'll be alright, I promise.
 

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"When Hantuchova makes a mistake she looks like a silent movie actress in total despair -- even when she's way ahead"

ROFLMAO!!! fUNNY ASS HELL
 

· SMUstang,
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DA FOREHAND said:
"When Hantuchova makes a mistake she looks like a silent movie actress in total despair -- even when she's way ahead"

ROFLMAO!!! fUNNY ASS HELL
svetlana krivencheva does this too its funny
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 · (Edited)
martamagica said:
Lena had mononucleosis, and she lost over 20 pounds because of it.

Don't make remarks like that about her again, because I will stick up my foot up your fucking ass if you do again. Thanks.
Forgot to mention that I saw Bovina on the 2nd day as well. She was doing a play-with-kids thing on Court 4. She spotted me and said, "Hi, Samantha L!"

My jaw dropped so hard it bruised my toes.

BOVINA: I know it's a fake name -- we have detailed files on all board members because some of the fans are psycho freaks we have to look out for.

For those of you who might not speak English that well, "about five pounds from eating disorder rumours" means:

1) a person is very, very thin.

2) DOESN'T look like she has an eating disorder.

I would also describe Sharapova, Srebotnik, MYSELF and a quarter of the girls (non-players) at the tournament that way.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
bis2806 said:
LOL great report hahaahaa... btw please tell us more about the dokic-widjaja match :)
I was impressed with Widjaja, but she didn't have much to threaten Dokic with.

Baseline rallies could go either way, but when Dokic decided to take a step inside the baseline the point would be over in a hurry.

Dokic served great.

We taped the match to see if we were on TV...Dokic is prettier and FITTER-looking in person. TV somehow makes her look soft.

Afterwards they brought out Clijsters for a big-nothing ceremony advertising the fact they had the new #1 at the tournament. I think the red spots on Clijsters' cheeks aren't acne, they're cold sores from the millions of people she kisses. Dokic made a point of kissing her on the way out.
 
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