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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Billie Jean King is an icon, a legend in womens tennis and a martyr to women athletes around the globe. But now, she can be called DIVA! Billie Jean has transformed herself and put out what critics believe may be the HOTTEST record in years! Given Billie Jean's popularity is at an all time high, now is the perfect time to release her new CD! Even though Billie Jean's racy and steamy video, "Fed Cup Life" was pulled from the airwaves, Billie Jean's song has been racing up the charts!

It's a fact, BJK is BIGGER THAN EVER. And her music is great, too!



Her first single's lyrics are set to the tune of Madonna's AMERICAN LIFE:

Do I have to change my name?
Will it get me far?
I think I need to lose some weight!
Am I gonna be a star?

I tried to be with a boy,
I tried to be with a girl
I tried to be a mess,
I tried to be the best
I guess I did it wrong,
That's why I wrote this song

This type of tennis life - Is it for me?
This type of tennis life - Is it for free?
So, I went into a bar looking for sympathy
A little company - I tried to find a friend
It's more easily said it's always been the same
This type of tennis life -Is not for me?
This type of tennis -Is not for free?

Fed Cup life
I live the Fed Cup dream
It's the best thing I've seen,
And I get to be really mean

Fed Cup life
I live the Fed Cup dream
It's the best thing I've seen,
And I get to be really mean

I tried to be with a boy,
I tried to be with a girl
I tried to be a mess,
I tried to be the best
I tried to find a friend,
I tried to stay ahead
I tried to stay on top...

Fuck it...


I'm drinking a Soy latte
I fired Capriati
It goes right through my body
And you know I'm satisfied,
I married a man named King
but I did not want his ding-a-ling
So I went to get my haircut
And you know I'm satisfied
And the schedule is full of hotties
So I'm checking out the bodies
And you know I'm satisfied
I'm hanging onto my power trip
No players on my team give me lip
And if all this can give me hope
I should be regarded higher than the Pope
You know I'm satisfied
I got a Venus and Serena
At least to do one round
So I'll fuck over those other clowns
Alex Stevenson is on the bench
No one goes against me, that fuckin wench
that's right I invented tennis
So what If I never eat the lettuce
All the WTA should thank my ass
I have the most titles on grass
So what If I bend my rules
I'm a legend, I ain't no fool
Do you think I'm satisfied?
I fucked over Gigi, Amy, Lisa and Jennifer too
I can never be wrong, I have power, I really do
They gave me Fed Cup because It's unpopular
But at least I got to a ride in Jen-Jen's Ferarr(i)
I started the WTA, thank you Virginia Slims
A cig before a match, I just thought It fit.
Do you think I'm satisfied?
I'd like to express my extreme point of view
I'm not Belgian and I'm not a Jew
I'm just living out the Fed Cup dream
And I just realized that nothing Is what it seems

Here are the other songs on this hit record!
 

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well what can i say???

beyond funny...this is roll on the floor funny!

love those opening lines "i think i need to lose some weight" and the parts "i tried to be with a boy, tried to be with a girl"!

and the rap part is so funny...every part...love the Stevenson on the bench part....

i drink a soy latte
i fired capriati! ROTFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

if I hadnt already slobbered all over you with rep points...i'd give more RIGHT NOW...but i cant...i am on way to best buy to pick up my own copy of Fed Cup life!
 

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man, i still cant stop laughing...i just adore that opening 'news brief' type thing...the part where is says shes now a DIVA! so funny...and how the video was pulled from the airwaves! ROTFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLllll

this is the funniest stuff since Jen's cd hit # 1 (i'm a grand slam champion so fuck you)
 
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insane in the membrane! :p
 
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The graphics on Jens cd were exceptional only because she gave us so much material to begin with! jen and her crazy ass!

LOL
 

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darren cahill said:
The graphics on Jens cd were exceptional only because she gave us so much material to begin with! jen and her crazy ass!

LOL
her crazy, sexy ass! ;) :lick: i thought this was great!! LMAO :D now i know what rhymes with Capriati! :D
 

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Discussion Starter #12
darren cahill said:
The graphics on Jens cd were exceptional only because she gave us so much material to begin with! jen and her crazy ass!

LOL
I'm sure BJK wanted a simple, toned down look... ya know- Billie, plain and tall.
 

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wow, 2 words i'd NEVER call billie jean-----plain and tall...more like pasty and stumpy! (but i did get the joke there)

but i like your idea of a toned down, more simple look.... ;)
 

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Keith said:
Billie Jean King is an icon, a legend in womens tennis and a martyr to women athletes around the globe. But now, she can be called DIVA! Billie Jean has transformed herself and put out what critics believe may be the HOTTEST record in years! Given Billie Jean's popularity is at an all time high, now is the perfect time to release her new CD! Even though Billie Jean's racy and steamy video, "Fed Cup Life" was pulled from the airwaves, Billie Jean's song has been racing up the charts!

It's a fact, BJK is BIGGER THAN EVER. And her music is great, too!



Her first single's lyrics are set to the tune of Madonna's AMERICAN LIFE:

Do I have to change my name?
Will it get me far?
I think I need to lose some weight!
Am I gonna be a star?

I tried to be with a boy,
I tried to be with a girl
I tried to be a mess,
I tried to be the best
I guess I did it wrong,
That's why I wrote this song

This type of tennis life - Is it for me?
This type of tennis life - Is it for free?
So, I went into a bar looking for sympathy
A little company - I tried to find a friend
It's more easily said it's always been the same
This type of tennis life -Is not for me?
This type of tennis -Is not for free?

Fed Cup life
I live the Fed Cup dream
It's the best thing I've seen,
And I get to be really mean

Fed Cup life
I live the Fed Cup dream
It's the best thing I've seen,
And I get to be really mean

I tried to be with a boy,
I tried to be with a girl
I tried to be a mess,
I tried to be the best
I tried to find a friend,
I tried to stay ahead
I tried to stay on top...

Fuck it...


I'm drinking a Soy latte
I fired Capriati
It goes right through my body
And you know I'm satisfied,
I married a man named King
but I did not want his ding-a-ling
So I went to get my haircut
And you know I'm satisfied
And the schedule is full of hotties
So I'm checking out the bodies
And you know I'm satisfied
I'm hanging onto my power trip
No players on my team give me lip
And if all this can give me hope
I should be regarded higher than the Pope
You know I'm satisfied
I got a Venus and Serena
At least to do one round
So I'll fuck over those other clowns
Alex Stevenson is on the bench
No one goes against me, that fuckin wench
that's right I invented tennis
So what If I never eat the lettuce
All the WTA should thank my ass
I have the most titles on grass
So what If I bend my rules
I'm a legend, I ain't no fool
Do you think I'm satisfied?
I fucked over Gigi, Amy, Lisa and Jennifer too
I can never be wrong, I have power, I really do
They gave me Fed Cup because It's unpopular
But at least I got to a ride in Jen-Jen's Ferarr(i)
I started the WTA, thank you Virginia Slims
A cig before a match, I just thought It fit.
Do you think I'm satisfied?
I'd like to express my extreme point of view
I'm not Belgian and I'm not a Jew
I'm just living out the Fed Cup dream
And I just realized that nothing Is what it seems

Here are the other songs on this hit record!
You know the funny thing is that her and Elton John are friends and he wrote "Philedephia Freedom" with her in mind!
 

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Goooooo BJK! :worship:
 

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Ooh Keith, thank you so much for letting everyone know about this. I've been away doing some promotion work for the record. I've been in some amazing places around the world. My manager has had me visit places as exciting as Delaware, Kuwait City, Swansea and lots of other places I can't remember the names of, but they had nice McDonalds.

My manager tells me that I have a BIG following, and no, that isn't my backside I'm referring to. This record is expecting to make me a star in the music world, as well as being a living legend in women's/men's/what am I looking like today? tennis.

So please, buy my record and make me money to go and spend at Burger King.
 

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Keith thats just brill!!
 
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