RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats' - TennisForum.com
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Old May 17th, 2014, 10:30 AM   #1
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RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

A Tale Of A Moo





Prehistoric species of Moo. Origins and evolution unknown. It is said that its predecessor was the white-tailed deer.

Early signs of Moo power shown. The emergence of Cow-on-Ice.

Peak Cow-on-Ice Moo. Being clumsy, awkward, and stomping around the court like a trucker.

Wounded Moo. A Moo whose fighting through pain led it to a duel with Daniela Sanowa, a duel that was almost won, however, it was not meant to be.

Warrior Moo. A Moo whose perseverance led it closest to the hole grail than ever before, yet its conquest was shattered by a neanderthal.

Disaster Moo. A Moo that was dressed like a goddess and destined for greatness, yet had a 2006 Déjà vu.

Comeback Moo. A Moo that demonstrated what 'a fighter' really means by overcoming all its shortcomings and prevailing only based on sheer will power.


A Poetry-In-Motion Moo. A Moo that was an artist on the court, an epitome of grace, finesse, and class.

The birth of Claypova. A Moo who established itself as a force to be reckoned with.

Triumphant Moo. A Moo who became a legend. After years of failure and hardships, this Moo fulfilled its quest for glory and ascended on the throne.

Bridesmaid Moo. A Moo that fiercely fought to defend its reign, yet fell into battle and was forced down from its throne.

Mystery Moo. A Moo who has succumbed to Scrubulkova, Babyfat, Giorgi... even Ivanovic in recent times. Which kind of Moo will emerge on the battleground known as Roland Garros is an enigma.

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Old May 17th, 2014, 10:31 AM   #2
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

As requested by my lesbian paramour.



Will update and actually do the opening post after Monday.

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Old May 17th, 2014, 11:05 AM   #3
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'



Maria Antonia Yuryevna Sharapova
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Old May 17th, 2014, 11:20 AM   #4
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Good luck Maria.
Hopefully a decent draw here.
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Old May 17th, 2014, 11:29 AM   #5
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

This tread is legendary already.

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Old May 17th, 2014, 12:07 PM   #6
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

A French title, I feel good vibes
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Old May 17th, 2014, 12:11 PM   #7
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'



come on Maria!
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Old May 17th, 2014, 02:05 PM   #8
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Let them eat bagels and breadsticks Maria.
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Old May 17th, 2014, 02:29 PM   #9
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Awesome thread
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Old May 17th, 2014, 03:04 PM   #10
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Allow them some samples of Sugarpova.
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Old May 17th, 2014, 03:49 PM   #11
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

je'l adore

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Old May 17th, 2014, 04:37 PM   #12
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'


Damn you beat me to it
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Maria is the Queen of getting my hopes up, and then ripping out my fucking heart and stomping me to death.
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Old May 17th, 2014, 04:38 PM   #13
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Good luck Maria!
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Old May 17th, 2014, 06:01 PM   #14
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

how dare you start this thread
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Old May 17th, 2014, 06:21 PM   #15
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Re: RG'14: La Renaissance de Moo: 'Shoving Cake Down Peasants' Throats'

Maria comes into this years FO with a good chunk of clay court wins and 2 championships. I hope she's been praticing her serve and Sven has been helping her figure out how to get off to better starts. Despite that recent loss of Ivanovic, she should be feeling confident to make a good run here. I'm not predicting anything, but I wish our girl the very best. Hopefully she can claim a second title at Roland Garros. That would be splendid!
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