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Old Jan 28th, 2012, 12:04 AM   #61
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Originally Posted by Christina Cha View Post
Question for you guys that have social anxiety:

Has the internet helped you get over it OR has it made it worse OR has it had no effect on your social anxiety?


Thanks.
I'd probably say it has made it worse, though I find it very comforting to find others with similar problems online.
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Old Feb 25th, 2012, 02:49 PM   #62
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Old Feb 25th, 2012, 09:19 PM   #63
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

It's definitely not easy to live as a shy silent person.

Last week I had one embarassing moment. I was walking down the streets early in the morning in Luxembourg city and came across a bus station where I saw a couple of people standing. I just wanted to pass as quick as possible because these kind of situations scare me.

Then there was a person out of these "strangers" coming straight to me and talking to me. At this moment I was in real panic and my heart beat accelerated. (That trauma comes from two attacks I have had at railway stations years ago by the way).

Then suddenly I recognized the girl standing in front of me. It is a girl who is with me in a class for job preparation courses. I was really embarassed at that moment that I was in such a panic and that it took me a few seconds to recognize her. I stuttered "Sorry but I didn't recognize you", so embarassing furthermore that I really love this girl.

She's a real sweetheart and one of the rare persons I've met who seems to accept me as a calm introverted person. She has studied psychology by the way.

The majority of people consider you as a strange person with no real character when you are very calm. I need my time to get accustomed to new people and make conversations with them, usually many people don't give you the needed time but just consider you as an outsider or whatever.

A few weeks ago there was a Christmas party in the office I'm going to work where all the new trainees have been presented to the stuff - this is just the real nightmare for every person with social phobia and god was I nervous before that day.

Thank god that girl was present there too, she is a fellow trainee, and she was like "Let's go to that room and meet new people." I only talked to these people when they were directly talking to me. A real challenge is to start a conversation on my own with people I don't know. I am always so nervous inside even when speaking to people I know longer.

The main reason of my social phobia comes from being a twin. I have been in the same classes like my brother until 15 years, maybe that was a bit too long. I have always been a shy person but was more talkative when being with my twin brother who is a lot more extroverted by the way. I felt protected in his shadow and lost without him.

I don't dare to talk too much with people about my problems because I am afraid of their reactions. The social phobia hinders me in my life and it makes me depressive.
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Old Feb 26th, 2012, 01:08 AM   #64
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Old Feb 26th, 2012, 01:33 AM   #65
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

I've never really told anyone but I used to have it, it was probably at it's worst when I was about 20 but I managed to change and have pretty much rid myself of it totally.

I remember back then aside from School / College I wouldn't leave the house out of fear. I was even too scared to post on this forum for a long while. So even socializing online was out of the question at that stage.

This is my first post here in over a year and I've not really been active since 2009 because I've been busy getting on with my life and being social offline

If you want to change enough you can and you should not be afraid to get proper help in doing so
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Old Feb 29th, 2012, 10:36 AM   #66
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Definately I can relate to almost everybody in this thread.

I go to university now and it's really hard on me. I'm in second year and have to do alot of presentations and stuff right now and I also have to find a place to do an internship for 6 months.
However I always sit in the back of the class, NEVER say things out loud when teacher asks questions even when I know the answer and I always walk with me face down because I have 0 confidence about how I look etctera
.
I feel like people in my class think I'm boring because I'm silent, I must say I do have some "friends" right now where I hang out with and sometimes we do stuff after school which I really enjoy.

However they are not the kind of friends that I can tell stories of my private life, such as my dad having a huge depression and sitting home for 6 months and wanting all my attention when I come from school. also he fights alot with my mother and sometimes he removes the internet so I can't do my homework and have to make excuses at school which is really hard. because I do everything with projectgroups and my classmates are merciless.
and everytone thinks I'm just a silent geeky guy. Then I also have a very rare disease which totally ruins my life.

Honestly I do melt away in feeling sorry for myself and then I think: You only live once, YOU HAVE TO enjoy it"

And then I just get so angry! that there are so many people that make life so hard for people that are shy, silent and different...
I am very proud of myself for being openminded, I respect everyone and don't judge ever because I know how it is to be judged and bullied because you are not standard or normal..
It does comfort me in a way that there are other people like me, even though I don't wish it to anybody.

I can say alot more but I think this is to much already
This is exactly like me, even tonight sitting in class, I know the answer, yet I won't say anything.

We have to do a lot of presentations, and I hate them. I get so, so nervous waiting to go up and and talk. Last week I went up there and the nerves just built up the entire time I had to wait. In the end my talk was a disaster, I really struggled, messed up words, and after I sat down I was thinking to myself whether ANY of it even made sense, even though I was prepared. It's a horrible feeling while talking wondering whether people notice your absolute fear, which I'm sure they do. That is the worst part, wondering what others are thinking of you while you're a wreck.
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Old Mar 3rd, 2012, 02:13 PM   #67
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Old Mar 4th, 2012, 01:38 AM   #68
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Old Mar 21st, 2012, 08:35 AM   #69
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

I have found this forum.

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com

I just create an account there and thought that others would join too.
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Old Mar 27th, 2012, 10:30 AM   #70
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

Feeling really emotional today. I told my Mum that I wanted to perform at my old school, and that entering the music biz was my dream. I didn't really say that one of the reasons for doing it would be to get some recognition and attention that I crave. Not sure my Mum knows how unhappy I am, deep down. On the surface I'm OK.
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 10:31 AM   #71
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

Had a rough time of it lately. I'm in that mood where I could just disappear and nobody would care . I give up trying to be social at all. It's never going to happen. Basically my hope is resting on very thin ice. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to get through this life with things as they are, and I don't see them changing either...
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 03:52 PM   #72
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

I like being anti-social in real life because it means I can boost my post count on here.


I love you guys.
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 05:09 PM   #73
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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I would venture that social phobia is heavily over diagnosed.

What ever happened to just being nervous ?
Comparing any anxiety disorder to "just being nervous" is akin to calling serial killing "having a rough day."

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikey. View Post
I mean, I can go to a party or something if I really want to, but the whole process is just so traumatic and exhausting for me. [...] I feel like I have wasted most of my life hiding away from most social situations and worrying about what other people think of me.
I'm clinically diagnosed with anxiety disorder and social anxiety disorder. A lot of Mikey's posts in this thread (particularly the parts above and below) are exactly what it's like. It's a lot easier to cope when you have a solid routine; it's a cycle which repeats from "assessing the problem" to "having confidence to cope." The hard parts are dealing with last-minute interactions. It's a constant exhausting struggle to try to adapt to even moderate changes in routine that require spontaneous new engagement with other people. It becomes paralyzing.

Quote:
One thing I actually find quite funny about this problem is how I'm so sensitive to negative criticism and judgement, while at the same time any clear and honest compliments cause me just as much harm.
This is quoted for serious truth -- and this is why it's not "just being nervous." Why would anyone paying a compliment to you/liking you/enjoying your company make someone nervous unless you have a condition which prevents you from dealing with it?

I've always said the worst day for someone with social anxiety is his or her birthday. Attention from others for "no reason" compounds the anxiety with sheer senselessness. Any holidays involving the giving of presents just for being alive are strange.

Therapy works. Meds work but I don't want to get fat. Obviously being more of a hermit than other people can also compound the issue because then I feel that others are judging me for being asocial, but it sure helps when you can defend it by saying "I make good money so I DO WHAT I WANT BITCH." This is almost definitely why I throw myself into my work.

To say anxiety has crippled my achievements would be the understatement of the century, but every year I get better at dealing with it. By the time I turn 100 I should be ready to live a normal life and am very excited about that.

TMI. The End.
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 06:52 PM   #74
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

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Had a rough time of it lately. I'm in that mood where I could just disappear and nobody would care . I give up trying to be social at all. It's never going to happen. Basically my hope is resting on very thin ice. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to get through this life with things as they are, and I don't see them changing either...
Gosh I can't even tell you how bad I was when I was younger, 4 or 5 years ago I barely had friends, or even get out of my house, couldn't even go to school, now I still have work to do but social anxiety isn't an important problem now, I can say I'm a regular guy with caring friends, a job, a happy life. Don't lose hope!
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 09:33 PM   #75
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Re: Who here has Social Anxiety/Phobia or exhibit the symptms of it?

to all of you in this thread. Though I gotta say, looking at the post count of some people, it is hard to imagine they are leading "normal" lives. Especially because it appears most of them have Twitter accounts and such.

I've had such problems, but not as serious as most you have it. I've matured a lot in the few years and gradually lost most of my silly fears, insecurities and illusions.

@dsanders: You've become very nice over the course of the last few months. I hope it's more because of your improved social life rather than Sharpie winning RG

@ Diamondtieva: you must be the sweetest poster here I've never seen you spilling hatred towards player or posters, despite spending quite a lot of time here.


Oh, I even have a silly advice: you guys should try to spend some time with children. They certainly won't judge you in the manner adults do, so you can feel more relaxed talking to them. They will constantly ask you something, frustrate you, make you laugh, force you to express your feelings...
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