Justin: Well, since you have such a boring personality, and your tennis is as unremarkable as any women's tennis, I'm having a hard time selling your image to the world.
You roll your eyes.
You: So? That's your problem, not mine, now is it?
Justin: Well, we've come up with a few ideas. For starters, we're lauching a new website that will make you seem more interesting than you actually are.
You: I see.
Justin: The thing is, we don't really have any content for it. Could you like, type up your life story or something and e-mail it to me tonight?
You: What? But I need to practice?!
Justin: Blah blah. Tennis isn't a game, honey, it's a business. So get your sexy ass in gear and start writing. Stat!
He hangs up and you curse out loud, realizing that you should soon get a new PR manager.
((( Write a biography about your player. It should be at least 200 words but can be longer. It does not have to be based on the actual celebrity's life; in fact it's better if you make something up. Write it in the third person, so using "she" and not "I". Post the biography in this thread and if it doesn't completely suck you will get...
Reward: 3 stat points )))
Quest completed by:
2013 saviors of the WTA
SERENA WILLIAMS 60 60 CAROLINE WOZNIACKI 60 60 EKATERINA MAKAROVA 16 62 63 SERENA WILLIAMS 61 63
MARIA SHARAPOVA 61 26 64 FLAVIA PENNETTA 60 60 SAM STOSUR 62 63 SERENA WILLIAMS 75 67 61
VENUS WILLIAMS 62 64 ANDREA PETKOVIC 64 26 64 JELENA JANKOVIC 64 63 NA LI 62 61
Last edited by Kworb : Mar 30th, 2009 at 07:54 PM.
Janet Jackson has loved tennis from an early age, although some would argue it was the boys playing tennis that she liked. I mean, everytime she saw Jimmy Connors on the television, she would become captivated. She learned how to say Jimmy, before she could say Michael.
As Janet got older she would see her father working with her older brothers on the tennis court. They would hit balls, morning, noon, and night; but young Janet would seem to have no interest in the sport. Her father would attempt to coherse her into playing, but Janet would have none of it.
One day her brother Jermaine was on his way home from the local library. He spotted someone who resembled Janet at a public tennis center near Minute Maid Park. He thought that he would stick around, but out of site to see what Janet did in her spare time. He noticed that Janet was keeping her eye on one particular guy on the court.
Some dude named Robby. Jermaine knew the guy from around the way and had played against him in a couple of local events. (Loosing badly in both matches).............but anyway, what was she doing with Robby?
To Be Continued .....................
GV - Back From The Dead.........
Venus better have her hair fixed for the AO I'm just tired of it.
Last edited by GracefulVenus : Jan 14th, 2009 at 02:28 PM.
Whitney Elizabeth Houston was born in Newark, New Jersey. She has 2 brothers and is the third and youngest child of the Houston family. Her father, John Houston is a former college tennis player who retired and is now giving tennis coaching lessons full time. Her mother, Cissy Houston, is a gospel singer who often does back-up vocals for famed singers like Aretha Franklin.
After several failed attempts to get his 2 sons into tennis, which they fumbled badly, John Houston decided not to force tennis down her daughter's throat. Instead Cissy Houston introduced Whitney to singing.
And did Whitney sang. She shone brightly with her raw talent. Her vocals soared and her gift in singing was unmistakable. She started following her mother's footsteps, singing and touring in night clubs and performing solo. She slowly garnered attention for her vocal prowess, and was gradually making the charge towards stardom.
Only at the age of 16 did Whitney picked up a tennis racquet for the first time, despite a rich history in tennis in her family. It was later revealed that after watching Chris Evert losing to Martina Navratilova in that year's Wimbledon final, Whitney was very interested with the mechanics of the game and was keen to pick up this sport.
Being generally a hater of every other sport, it was therefore surprising that Whitney cultivated a great interest in tennis. And with the inabilities of both his sons in attaining greater competency in tennis, it came as more of a surprise for John to see her daughter wielding a tennis racquet with such effortless grace for the first time.
John realised what he has is a raw talent in the form of his own daughter. And that was further justified when just after several simple sessions of coaching, Whitney actually grew increasingly solid and was apt enough to play both from the baseline and at the net. John was convinced that her daughter had the goods to deliver and would definitely take over the tennis world by storm.
But what John didn't realise was by then, the relatively well known Whitney Houston had already signed up a lucrative recording contract to release her debut album. John was devastated and insisted that Whitney make a choice.
Torn between singing and tennis, Whitney ultimately decided not to breach the contract and went on to release her multi-platinum selling debut album. With the release of another 2 extremely successful records, Whitney established herself as a bona-fide superstar, an icon and the number 1 diva in the game. Along the way she earned various accolades and honours, and was often nick-named 'The Voice' for her supreme vocals.
The clash earlier on between tennis and singing didn't make Whitney sever all ties with the former. Though her Dad was still mildly disgruntled by her choice, it was less intense than before. And Whitney still plays tennis recreationally, meanwhile fine-tuning her game all along.
After releasing the wildly successful movie soundtrack, 'The Bodyguard', which spawned the worldwide number 1 hit, 'I Will Always Love You', Whitney Houston stunned fans worldwide by announcing her immediate retirement from the glamour circle.
Fullfilling a long time dream of her father's and hers, Whitney decided to play tennis professionally to see where her talent would take her to.
Working through Challengers, ITFs, lower-tier tournaments and various qualifying rounds, Whitney had her fair share of hardship, gruelling matches, as well as crazy and adoring fans who happen to also be her opponent across the net. Whitney dealt these with remarkable poise and all the while worked hard on her game, and eventually landed in the top echelons of the game.
Will Whitney eventually claim the top ranking in the tennis world? Will she win a majoy to cement her as a tennis great? Ultimately, as fans of hers musically or tennis wise, the question is whether Houston would be able to transform from a multi-million selling superstar to a multi-major winning champion?
Kristin Laura Kreuk was born on on December 30 in 1982. She is a Canadian actress and tennis player. She is known for her roles on the Canadian television series teen soap Edgemont and on the American television series Smallville in which she starred as Lana Lang.
Kristin was born in Vancouver, British Columbia. Her father, Peter Kreuk, is of Dutch descent; her mother, Deanna Che, is of Chinese descent, but was born in Indonesia; her maternal grandmother was born in Jamaica of Chinese descent. Both parents are landscape architects. She has a sister named Justine, who is about five years younger. Kreuk trained in gymnastics at the national level until high school but quit in grade 11 due to scoliosis. She attended Edith Cavell Elementary School and Eric Hamber Secondary School in Vancouver.
She also modelled: The executives at Neutrogena made her the spokesmodel for their new worldwide ad campaign; in this regard Kreuk followed in the footsteps of fellow teen stars such as Jennifer Love Hewitt and Mandy Moore. In 2005, she renewed her contract with Neutrogena for another two years, making her the company's longest-serving model spokesperson.
After her work for Television in the well-known series Edgemont and Smallville she decided to start a tennis career. She started to play tennis when she was 4 years old. Since then this sport is her passion. Her strengths are a good serve and a thunderous forehand.
Na LI - Francesca SCHIAVONE - Roberta VINCI
Tamira's backhand, Roby's slice, Galina's dropshot
Last edited by ViennaCalling : Jan 17th, 2009 at 03:42 PM.
Serena Jameka Williams was born September 26th 1981 in Saginaw, Michigan. She grew up in the rough area of Compton, Los Angeles. She was quickly inducted into one of the fiercest gangs in the USA - the 24the District Bladers.
By the age of 16 she was one of the best fighters in the country and was a master with both firearms and swords. She was quickly snapped up to join the Deathly Viper Assassination Squad - conmposed of the world's top class assassins.
On one mission, Serena - or Black Mamba as she was otherwise known - was sent to kill a man just known as "Kworb". However, she was persuaded to give up her killing ways by this "Kworb" character who said that with her speed, skill and precision she had what it took to be the best tennis player this world had ever seen, and she agreed to join his Tennis RPG Tour along with older sister Venus Williams.
Serena has an thunderous serve and her groundstrokes are struck with such power that all the other girls fear her. She knows she has the tools to make it to the very top and she will do everything in her power to do so
Leslie Hall (born November 15, 1981, in Ames, Iowa) might be criticized for having too many outside interests taking away from her tennis. Be that as it may, Leslie feels that her style, glamor and lady raps are the reason for her success as a tennis player.
"You know," said Hall, "My music career has absolutely helped my tennis. I am 200 pounds of Grade A Iowa beef, and executing my astronomic dance moves while wearing gem sweaters or gold spandex body suits really helps me sweat out any excess weight and keeps me looking like a prime cut. I'm filet mignon, my child."
Hall has drawn flack for not caring about her fitness, but she claims she has been working with Dr. Walter Bartoli, who has been serving as her nutritionist.
"Oh, he is a shining rhinestone in a sea of dull gems," said Hall of Dr. Bartoli, "The diet he put me on can be tough at times. I mean, there is a lot of cake, chips, dips, and pastries to eat on a daily basis, but if it will help to keep me in a prize champion glamorous lady rapper tennis queen form, I guess I'll have to make the sacrifice."
Hall is looking forward to participating in Tennis RPG, and can only hope her competition is ready for her.
"I'm here," said Hall, "To wear my gold spandex pants on the tennis court and blind my opposition with my dazzling gems of groundstrokes and blast them away with my bedazzled tennis racket of truth. I pity any mortal who dares to challenge me on the tennis court of dreams. I will become green like the Hulk and feast off the flesh of the haters."
Before leaving our interview, Hall left us a copy of her latest single, titled "Zombie Killer," saying it will not only blow our minds, but perhaps serve as an example of what might happen to her opposition on the tennis courts. We can only wish her the best on her quest, and we hope the rest of the tour is prepared.
Zooey is the daughter of billionare producer, and aising composer Bli-Ng B-ling, and mother Angelina Jolie. She has one sister by the name of Emily, also an accomplished actress who has stared in numerous productions, her greatest accoomplishment bieng the star of FOX's BONES. Zooey's parents died you when Kelly Clarckson set tthier house on fire. The girls were then sent to a music conservatory where each learned to sing dance and act.
How She Found Tennis:
At the ripe age of seven Zooey picked up her first raquet, whenshe was cast in the movie, Roman Tabakova: I can hit Underhand Serves All I want Bitch, Zooey then fell imn love with the sport becoming a dedicated athlete and tennis watch, she caught her big break when she was asked to join th RPG tour.
Hobbies other than tennis:
Zooey loves singing and acting other than tennis as those were her main goals before tennis, ooey has sang and starred in movies, Yes-man, Elf the assasination of Jesse James and Eulogy. Zooey also has a band with hwer fiance called he saidshe said.
Melanie C (born January 12, 1974) started her career as a member of the successful British girl group the Spice Girls. After they got bored with singing, since they were a group of five, they decided to become an independent basketball team until Geri Halliwell decided enough was enough. She left and soon after the group disbanded. Melanie then went back to singing and had a successful first solo album, but the second one ended up in disaster including being dropped. Being the "Sporty" one of the group, Melanie took aim at soccer to little success. She didn't find her niche until she got her hand on a tennis raquet at an Elton John fundraiser and played doubles against Elton with much success. Melanie continued on to play other celebrities in tennis and then finally decided to make a career upon it. Her first celebrity championship was against former bandmate, Victoria Beckham whom to this date has been her only opponent to play in high heels. Melanie's temper does sometimes get the best of her when she double faults she tends to say "bloody hell" or "fucking ****". Once in an interview, she was asked, "can you believe Girls Aloud is the biggest British girl group now?" she threw her raquet at the reporter and told him to "take it and shove it up his fucking ass. Girls Aloud will never be what the Spice Girls were. They're a bunch of nontalented twatheads."
__________________ V. Williams | F. Pennetta | K. Bondarenko | A. Bondarenko | S. Williams | V. Zvonareva | S. Errani | D. Cibulkova
Ello. I'm Lily Allen, one of the newest players to the tour but I definitely think that like, I'm going to be a good player and such. I think there's a lot of good players but a lot of them see like skanks but whatever. Hopefully they know already and I won't have to tell em. I know I'm supposed to write stuff like where I'm from and all that jazz but I don't want that nasty bugger trying to follow me around. Cause once they start followin you it's like you can't knock em out, you can't walk away, you try desperately to think of the politest way to say, just get out my face, just leave me alone and no you cant have my number, because I lost my phone.
The other day I was just like walking around and stuff and Janet Jackson ran up to me and flashed me her nipple. And I was like "Woah woah woah you sad cow." I mean if you walk around with your tatters floppin about the media goes craaaazzzy. Then I'm buyin my bloody chili dog and I get knocked out of line by this big fat ass that was connected to Serena Williams. And I was like "Oy, what the hell you bloody wanker." And she just rolleyed her eyes and farted and I was like totally gassed into running away. I could've knocked her out easily if she didn't wear those big stripper heels. But I guess shes gotta wear pretty big shoes to keep that nancy off the pavement.
I've had a pretty slow start on tour but I think I'm getting there. Hopefully you'll hear more from me soon. Until then, I'll spot ya later. Tally ho.