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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 12:02 AM   #1
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Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

OK, most of You saw threads in GM about Locker-room Confrontation.
I thought it would be fun if we make similar thread, but with JJ in leading role. Apart from JJ there would be other WTA or ATP players (and coaches) and other people who could be for some reason interesting to appear.
Everyone should feel free to add any new episodes or just write few dialog lines they think would be fitting.
All this should make this loooooong breaks that JJ is having more bearable and bring some positive energy and smile to our faces.
Hopefully there will be lots of hilarious happenings and lines (well, anything concerning JJ usually is like that) .
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 12:05 AM   #2
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Re: Golden Girl Starring: JJ and others

Since apparently JJ is in Miami at the moment, fittingly first episode of Golden Girl starts exactly there.
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 12:15 AM   #3
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Re: Golden Girl Starring: JJ and others

Episode #1:

MIAMI BREAK:

JJ relaxing on beach under hot Miami sun. Season is almost finished and Jelena is catching some well deserved break before YEC.
After some time she’s had enough of sun and leaves to the cabins to change her bikini in some more appropriate clothing. She approaches
one cabin that appears to be free and opens the door. But alas, cabin was already occupied and in it was no other than her
nemesis – Justine Henin!!! Jelena immediately thought in herself: “OMG, not again!!! Wasn’t that hotel-incident embarrassing enough?!!!”
Justine was stunned as hell too, but just stood in cabin like statue, unable to let her voice out.
Justine appeared to be quite busty and JJ noted that instantly.
JJ: ”Errrmm, Hi, again Justine. What you’re doing here in Miami?!!! I’m crazy, so it’s not that surprising that I traveled half a world for nothing, but you……!!!”
Justine: “So what if I came here?!!! There’s nothing wrong with indulging myself with some nice vacation.”
JJ: “I guess not. But still, I’m quite surprised for seeing you in Miami, let alone in this cabin. Anyway….what’s all that with you being so busty?!!!”
Justine: “Sorry, what?!!!!!”
JJ: “Isn’t your flat-chestiness one of most recognizable attributes of yours?!!! I mean, there’s no need for you to put socks there, honey.”
Justine: “First of all, it’s none of your business how my chests are looking. And second of all, that’s not socks! Uhmm….I mean….”
JJ: “Not socks!!!!! Then what?!!!!”
Justine: “It’s none of your business, leave me alone!!!”
JJ: “OK, let me just take a little peek, I won’t tell anyone, honest.
Justine: “NO!!! Go away!!!”
Jelena reaches for Justine’s bath-suit, pulls it a bit and…… To her astonishment tennis-ball wrapped up in sock fell out from Justine’s bath-suit. JJ controlled herself from bursting to MEGA-laughter and calmly said to Justine:
JJ: “Oh sweety, there’s really no need for such things. You should be proud of your body, you’re very fit and not having any bust isn’t a big deal”
Justine: “Just shut up, flat-face! I’m leaving and don’t try to accidently bump on my door in hotel!!! Or else….!”
JJ: “OK, no need to be offensive. Have a nice day (bitch).”
So, Justine left to her hotel and JJ finally had cabin all to herself. JJ put her bikini on the cabin-wall and continued changing her clothing. Suddenly a hand appeared above from cabin next to Jelena’s and took her bikini. JJ didn’t noticed that, being busy with changing clothes, but after few seconds she looked up to take her bikini and pack it into her bag and it was missing. She immediately ran out of cabin and spotted what appeared to be blond girl dressed in bathrobe running away with her bikini. JJ without hesitation started chasing a thief (despite complete fatigue due to 237185 matches she played this year). After 200m Jelena finally was able to stop blondie, so she threw herself on to blondie and they both fell on ground. Still not knowing the thief’s face, cause blondie was lying faced down to ground, Jelena started screaming on her:
JJ: “Are you crazy?!!! Why did you stolen my bikini?!!!”
Jelena rolled over poor girl to see who is she talking to, but…
JJ: “Bloody hell, WTF?!!!!! It is you Pierre Yves!!!!! You freak, what are you trying?!!!!!”
Pierre Yves, totally embarrassed tried to say something in his defense but JJ continued to scream at him:
JJ: “Are you insane?!!! No wonder Justine divorced from you! Who knows what you’ve been doing to her when she now puts tennis balls in her bath-suit. Just give me my bikini back and SCRAM!!!! You sicko!!!!”
Fittingly, Sneki was coming out from local store with mineral water at that time. JJ saw her and they both leaved back to hotel.
Sneki: “Who was that person in bathrobe?”
JJ: “Uhmmm, no one. Some beggar asking for money.”
Sneki: “Really, cause it looked like some blond girl to me. Anyway, sweety how was your day today? (gulp, gulp)”
JJ: “Errrrmmm, well quite normal for my standards.”
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WAIIIITTTT...Queenus BITCH!!!! She looks great and she seems excited. BITCHHHHHH...slay my pussy
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 08:21 AM   #4
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

LOL!
Great start Ivan!!
Once I am over my hangover... I'll have a go at Episode II!
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 11:28 AM   #5
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

Quote:
(gulp, gulp)
Is this like : Sneki drinking water ?
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 03:59 PM   #6
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustDoIt View Post
Is this like : Sneki drinking water ?
Yep
I couldn't resist not to put her in, even if she appeared only in last couple of sentences
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WAIIIITTTT...Queenus BITCH!!!! She looks great and she seems excited. BITCHHHHHH...slay my pussy
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 06:25 PM   #7
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

Hihihihi

Great stuff Ivan.
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"We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Australia, in France, in Great Britain and in the United States, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence (mental) and growing strength (physical) in the air (serve and volley), we shall defend our lovely Island (Jelena), whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches (clay-courts), we shall fight on the landing grounds (hard-courts), we shall fight in the fields (grass-courts) and in the streets (WTAworld), we shall fight in the hills(reaching the top) we shall and we will never surrender.“ GO JJ.........AMEN
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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 08:09 PM   #8
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

ROAD TO WIMBY 07– A Speculation on the strange world of Mixed Troubles (Based earlier in the year - March 2007)

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (1)
SOUND of bustling TALKING on radios

FADE IN

EXT: MIAMI Combined ATP/WTA Tournament: Exhibition/Party staff walking back and forth – organised chaos setting up the red carpet area; hassled staffers from ATP/WTA tours with flapping lanyards hurrying around, looking stressed

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (2)

FADE IN
EXT: Series of cuts of executive cars/limos arriving with various tennis stars getting out; hassled lackeys leading them to a bank of cameras

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (3)

FADE IN
EXT: 3 young men clamber from a car to be greeted by an ATP Staffer – all tall, one blond and rangy, the other two with unruly mops of hair

CUT TO
EXT: Red Carpet Area – looking out onto banks of photographers and endless flashes

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (4)
EXT: The 3 guys stand, waiting their turn. The blond guy is exuberant and making sure that the girls having their pictures taken can hear him.
The younger of the 2 paler guys is begging the other to help him get a beer as he’s older…

ERIC TALKING to JAMIE who is equally being distracted by ANDY on the other side of him

ERIC
Come on – seriously – the Bryan boys have marketed themselves on this whole “frat boy” element – I think we need to do the same… I guarantee it’ll score us some action

ANDY
Oh come ON… Mum need never know – just the one beer – I’ll make it last all evening, honest… please, Jamie and I promise I won’t go on about how I now thrash you at every thing we do


Jamie looks across to the Red Carpet area for a moment and catches the eye of the next person to face the photographers… a striking looking girl with unmistakable features, who strikes a pose while flashing a genuine smile
She happens to look over to where these guys are clamouring for Jamie’s attention and briefly smiles at him


JAMIE
Andy – you have got to be kidding, seriously – mum is right over there. Go get a coke and have done with it.


He looks over and smiles at the girl

ERIC
(follows his gaze)
You have NO chance – what you think you – shy Jamie could just walk up to her and say – hey chick… fancy a round of doubles with me later?
I’ll show you how it’s done…

ANDY
(also looking over)
Heh! Yeah – I’ll win a Wimbledon title long before you’d ever be able to charm someone like her…
(Sees that Jamie is completely taken in by this girl, and a little taken aback by Eric's actions...leans in to whisper in his brother’s ear as ERIC bounds over to the cameras)
But seriously bro – go talk to her anyway – before Eric sweeps her off her feet


Jamie and Andy follow Eric on to the Red Carpet for their photos to be taken.
Eric is being boisterous and looking over to make sure he has the girl’s attention… but notices she keeps looking past him

CUT TO
Jamie and Andy standing casually as they have their photos taken together
Eric has now positioned himself next to Jelena and is hollering mock abuse at the Murray boys

JELENA
Hi – I’m wondering whether you can help me…

ERIC
Sure – hey why don’t we go get a drink and discuss whatever you need over there out of the way…

JELENA
(cranes away slightly, looking confused)
Oh no… I was just going to ask – who’s that guy with Andy Murray… I see him sometimes practicing and watching, sometimes carrying his rackets… is he a tennis player?

ERIC
Sure is – he’s actually my tennis partner – we’re gonna be the new Bryan brothers.
I’m marketing us as Booty & Stretch (I’m Booty by the way) and we’re the frat-boy invasion. He’s Andy’s big brother… but again… let’s chat over a…

JELENA
Stretch? That can’t be his name?


CUT TO
An amused older woman striding towards the Murray brothers – on closer look she seems to be related to them
She pretends to clip the older Murray across the ear

JUDY
JAMIE! Did you honestly think I’d let you get away with trying to get a beer for Andy?

The three of them walk towards the waiting Eric and Jelena
Eric starts to follow them as they progress towards the party and Jamie looks back, just once and flashes Jelena a grin

JELENA
(being ushered to the WTA buffet by a WTA staffer)
Jamie… Jamie Murray…

FADE OUT

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Old Oct 26th, 2007, 08:32 PM   #9
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others



Can't wait for the next episode!

Fantastic guys!!
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Old Oct 27th, 2007, 10:06 AM   #10
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

wow that's brilliant!
and i'm sure that there's actually an element of truth somewhere...
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Old Oct 27th, 2007, 11:49 AM   #11
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

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Can't wait for the next episode!

Fantastic guys!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by ornagesky
wow that's brilliant!
and i'm sure that there's actually an element of truth somewhere...
Hee! The pressure on the creative mind...
What's the next step - he saw her for definate in Miami (I think this year) ... ok so the next installment needs to be with his agent contacting her about playing at Wimbledon and then of course that famed meeting in the car park!

And she herself said that their playing was like a movie-script...

Hmm must go find that article somewhere...
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Old Nov 12th, 2007, 08:13 PM   #12
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

ROAD TO WIMBY 07– A Speculation on the strange world of Mixed Troubles (Based earlier in the year - June 2007)

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (1)
VOICEOVER (VO)
Previously, on Road to Wimby
JELENA
Hi – I’m wondering whether you can help me…

ERIC
Sure – hey why don’t we go get a drink and discuss whatever you need over there out of the way…

JELENA
(cranes away slightly, looking confused)
Oh no… I was just going to ask – who’s that guy with Andy Murray… I see him sometimes practicing and watching, sometimes carrying his rackets… is he a tennis player?

ERIC
Sure is – he’s actually my tennis partner – we’re gonna be the new Bryan brothers.
I’m marketing us as Booty & Stretch (I’m Booty by the way) and we’re the frat-boy invasion. He’s Andy’s big brother… but again… let’s chat over a…

JELENA
Stretch? That can’t be his name?


CUT TO
An amused older woman striding towards the Murray brothers – on closer look she seems to be related to them
She pretends to clip the older Murray across the ear

JUDY
JAMIE! Did you honestly think I’d let you get away with trying to get a beer for Andy?

The three of them walk towards the waiting Eric and Jelena
Eric starts to follow them as they progress towards the party and Jamie looks back, just once and flashes Jelena a grin

JELENA
(being ushered to the WTA buffet by a WTA staffer)
Jamie… Jamie Murray…

FADE OUT

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (2)

FADE IN

EXT: PARIS – ROLAND GARROS Practice Courts
ERIC and JAMIE stroll towards a free court, through a linkway.
ERIC stops in his tracks and whistles over to one of the courts
The girl practicing looks over and momentarily frowns, then recognises JAMIE, smiles and sketches a wave

ERIC
Right here will do fine


ERIC and JAMIE set up to practice on the court next to JELENA
ERIC acts boisterously to make sure he’s noticed (not least by other courts who stare over in irritation).
They are joined by LOUIS who starts to take them through drills

LOUIS
OK Jamie – get up to the net – let’s do those volley drills


LOUIS and ERIC begin to pelt tennis balls from close and longer range at JAMIE who begins reflex volleying them away
JELENA stops her practice to watch for a while

CUT TO
EXT: Side of the practice court – ERIC and JAMIE pausing for a break during their practice
JELENA walks behind their chairs and kit – having finished practicing


ERIC
So any time you want to join me in pelting balls at my freckly mate here, you just let me know

JELENA
(To Jamie)
You know, I should improve this part of my game but what you do – that’s too scary
(Chuckles, but doesn’t take her eyes off him)

JAMIE
(Smiling)
Well maybe one day you can join me in pelting someone else

JELENA
(Smiling)
Maybe…
OK Perhaps I will see you around in the Players Lounge?

JAMIE
Sure…except Eric here thinks that clay is something you mould into ashtrays for relatives you don’t particularly like!
We’re hoping to better here than we have done on clay but we’ll see


JELENA laughs at this, gently lays her hand on JAMIE’S arm as she walks by, fails to notice a look of indignation on ERIC’S face at being made fun of, and waves as she walks away

CUT TO
EXT: The completion of a tennis match – JAMIE and ERIC playing the losing point of their R16 match.

CUT TO
EXT: The Womens Singles Semi Final – Justine Henin closes out a 6-2 6-2 victory against JELENA

FADE OUT

FADE IN
INT: PATRICIO’S office (the agent to both JAMIE and ANDY MURRAY)

TELEPHONE RINGS and is ANSWERED

PATRICIO
Hello…
Ah yes, thanks for returning my call

Yes that’s right…Jamie is a doubles specialist
He was just enquiring if…

Yes oh yes – it’s usually just seen as late evening fun at Wimbledon

They tend to put the bigger names and/or Brits on the larger courts – people often will stay to watch

OK so I’ll let him know that it’s a…

OK I’ll tell him maybe, depending on the draw.
OK thanks then


PATRICIO dials out

PATRICIO
Hey Jamie, it’s Patricio…
Yeah – just heard back from her agents…

Well it’s a maybe…


FADE OUT
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Old Nov 12th, 2007, 08:30 PM   #13
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

OMG, OMG what will happen NEXT.............
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Old Nov 13th, 2007, 11:35 AM   #14
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

Yes, Yes Episode 2 is as good as episode 1 and episode 1 was good, really good. I can't wait for episode 3
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Old Nov 16th, 2007, 08:43 PM   #15
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Re: Golden Girl *** Starring: JJ and others

ROAD TO WIMBY 07 PART 3– A Speculation on the strange world of Mixed Troubles (Based earlier in the year - June 2007)

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (1)
VOICEOVER (VO)
Previously, on Road to Wimby

INT: PATRICIO’S office (the agent to both JAMIE and ANDY MURRAY)

TELEPHONE RINGS and is ANSWERED

PATRICIO
Hello…
Ah yes, thanks for returning my call

Yes that’s right…Jamie is a doubles specialist
He was just enquiring if…

Yes oh yes – it’s usually just seen as late evening fun at Wimbledon

They tend to put the bigger names and/or Brits on the larger courts – people often will stay to watch

OK so I’ll let him know that it’s a…

OK I’ll tell him maybe, depending on the draw.
OK thanks then


PATRICIO dials out

PATRICIO
Hey Jamie, it’s Patricio…
Yeah – just heard back from her agents…

Well it’s a maybe…


FADE OUT

BLACK SCREEN – Titles (2)

FADE IN

EXT: QUEENS – BBC TV Footage
ERIC and JAMIE are warming up for their doubles match

INT: Commentary box
DAVID (MERCER)
And of course Jamie, older brother of Andy, is getting noticed and not just for his doubles skills – rumour has it apparently that Serbia’s Jelena Jankovic is rather keen on him
(Chuckling in the box from his co-presenter)

FADE OUT

CUT TO ORDINA OPEN – JELENA receives the runner’s up trophy
CUT TO NOTTINGHAM OPEN – ERIC and JAMIE win the tournament

CUT TO
EXT: An open Centre Court at Wimbledon as the Hertz vans start to bring the tennis players through to the practice courts.

DOOR SLIDES OPEN
JELENA gets out, lifting her racquet bag as another van pulls up
JAMIE gets out of this van and they recognise each other

JAMIE
Hey – So well done for Birmingham – pity you lost out at 's-Hertogenbosch

JELENA
(puts down bag briefly)
Yeah – well you know Ordina was also an ATP event – where were you guys?

JAMIE
(Smiling)
Oh you missed us?
Actually we stayed in the UK after Queens, we went up to Nottingham and we won there

JELENA
You know – my agents told me that you asked about the Mixed Doubles?
I am not so good with doubles – I don’t take it seriously, you know?
For me, it’s like practice, for sure

JAMIE
Look it’s just a bit of fun – often you can get really good crowds – the Brits love their tennis, especially if throws together strange combinations

JELENA
(laughs)
You think I’m strange?
You could ask anyone, Jamie – why are you asking me?

JAMIE
(also laughing)
Nah – but to be honest I hadn’t thought to ask anyone else – sure if you need to concentrate on the singles here – that’s fine…
I just think we could play really well together y’know

JELENA
Wait – where’s Eric? Isn’t he normally near by?

JAMIE
He’s staying elsewhere so he’ll be along in one of the cars in a minute

JELENA
You are not at the same hotel?
Oh or are you staying with Andy?

JAMIE
No – a friend who lives near by.
To be honest – all that ever happens is people ask me about Andy – so it’s nice to come “home” y’know

JELENA
For sure – for my mum and me, I have rented a small place nearby too


The two carry on chatting, cars are arriving all the time but they seem not to notice…

JAMIE
Look – I need to go meet Louis… will you play? Go on? You’ll have a laugh?
(Laughing out loud)
You get to spend hours hanging out with just me – no Eric
(smiles)
Look no pressure – let’s just go out and have some fun playing tennis in the evenings – I have no expectations at all here… just, y’know… give it a try?
(Laughs openly again)
Heh – for all we know we could win it!

JELENA
(Also laughing)
Yeah, but you know – we might go out in the first round!


PAUSE – one beat – they just stand looking at each other, smiling for a moment

JELENA
(softened smile)
OK go and sign
I am not good with this – I think you are making a mistake in asking me, but OK, I will play

JAMIE
(Smiles)
OK – deal
Let’s have a hit once the schedules are out…
Good luck in your match – see you later?
If you’re in the players lounge or something, maybe grab something to eat?

JELENA
OK – if I see you around, that would be nice
When is your match?

JAMIE
Hopefully we play tomorrow but, y’know - the weather.
I’ll see you


JAMIE heads off with a wave, but pauses to look back
JELENA – also pausing, waves back
They continue to their courts


FADE OUT
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