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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 04:03 AM   #1
Cybelle Darkholme
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The real absolutely Fake Maria Sharapova interview PART 2

M. SHARAPOVA/S. Kuznetsova

4 6, 6 2, 6 2

An interview with:

MARIA SHARAPOVA


THE MODERATOR: Questions for Maria, please.

Q. Match point there, how much did you have left in the tank?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: Just enough to get back to my hotel and then zoom around the
city on a shopping spree. I love my corvette and I drive it everywhere!

Q. Do you get a sense of who was feeling the heat more, yourself or your
opponent?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: It was hard to think about anything else except myself. I was
just trying to tell myself, "Maria the sun is so hot on my skin and I am
tanning so well and it feels so good."



I kept thinking back in my off season, you know, how hard it was to get a tan
because I played so many indoor matches. I thought I couldn't go on any more,
because I really need a tan to play good tennis.



Q. At what point did you first start to feel sick or feel exhausted?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: Well, from the beginning of the match, I could tell that Svelta
was oggling me like I knew she would. I am quite hot so I dont know she must
look. I was a bit lazy at the beginning of the match, asking her to put sun tan
lotion all over my body. My dad told me this would distract her.



I didn't run for as many balls because I really think I should not have to run
for balls while I am tanning on court. Did you see the one that almost hit me
while I was laying on the ad side? It could have left a mark.



You know, I was making too many errors just swinging my raket back and forth
while I tanned.



Q. Will your post match routine to recuperate change from what you normally do
after this match?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: Yeah, I'll definitely be cursing out my father afterwards for
not bringing an air condtioner on court. I told him, "Maria needs to be cool
and relaxed on court." But he said the extension cord did not reach. I did not
understand because I do not wear extensions.



Q. Where does it rank heat wise as far as matches you've played?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: I think it is I've played in hot weather, but I've never played in heat before. I know I am in heat because I have that tingling feeling down there in my woowoo. So this is a first for me.

But like I said, you've got to start somewhere, you've got to learn that even when your woowoo is tingling that you've got to find a way to get through it.

Q. Is it helpful to have a 10 minute break before the third set?


MARIA SHARAPOVA: Definitely. It's very helpful because I did some online shopping with my wireless laptop I keep in my bag. I was also able to order chinese takeout while online but it didnt come in time.


Q. Do you think they should have it at other tournaments where heat can be as high as here?

MARIA SHARAPOVA: I think all the girls are in heat, yes.

Q. Regarding the surface, Lleyton said it's as slow as clay. In the heat, did
you feel it's very slow, it's like clay?

MARIA SHARAPOVA: Didnt we talk about this yesterday? I don't worry about surfaces because I use a cammomille soap and soft water. Oh and Lleyton is the last thing on my mind when I am in heat.

Q. Is it too slow, the surface?

MARIA SHARAPOVA: Oh, hes definitely slow for me, because mr. rebound ace hasnt even called me yet. The nerve, yes?
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 04:08 AM   #2
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Funny but she will still lose!
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 04:21 AM   #3
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cybelle i realy really want that venus jen cap 2001 miami match.
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 05:17 AM   #4
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josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice josemanuel is just really nice
jajajaaj So funny!!!!!!
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 05:29 AM   #5
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Quote:
MARIA SHARAPOVA: I think it is I've played in hot weather, but I've never played in heat before. I know I am in heat because I have that tingling feeling down there in my woowoo. So this is a first for me.

But like I said, you've got to start somewhere, you've got to learn that even when your woowoo is tingling that you've got to find a way to get through it.
What's a 'woowoo'?
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 05:33 AM   #6
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Good Stuff
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 05:40 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ReeVeeDynasty
What's a 'woowoo'?
You know what a woowoo is.
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 06:00 AM   #8
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A tingly woowoo! I'm gonna tell Yuri, and He'll sit the Sharky Woowoo in a trash can full of ice!
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 06:20 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamgoddess099
You know what a woowoo is.
Ooooh...! That's coochie's l'il sister.
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 06:25 AM   #10
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MARIA SHARAPOVA: Yeah, I'll definitely be cursing out my father afterwards for
not bringing an air condtioner on court. I told him, "Maria needs to be cool
and relaxed on court." But he said the extension cord did not reach. I did not
understand because I do not wear extensions.

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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 06:54 AM   #11
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so damn funny lol
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 07:21 AM   #12
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That was pretty fun! Keep it coming with the next round, please!
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 07:22 AM   #13
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This one is really good... tops the previous one
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 07:40 AM   #14
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Thank you. God i needed a good laugh.
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Old Jan 26th, 2005, 08:09 AM   #15
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HAHA! this is hilarious!!
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