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Jan 5th, 2013, 06:41 AM
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#181
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,952
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by égalité
Sindel with her weave of destruction 
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And her scream of terror 
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Jan 5th, 2013, 07:25 AM
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#182
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procrastination
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 7,331
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Re: Coming out...
Fighterpova I wanna know the story
love happy endings
and love Sindel too 
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Jan 5th, 2013, 12:52 PM
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#183
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Leather bar
Posts: 3,460
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Re: Coming out...
Some of these stories are really inspiring. Many straight folk don't understand just how courageous it is for anyone to come out these days, regardless of the circumstances, it's a very major step and a very big deal. Good to see many of you have awesome coming out stories.
I never really came out because it was pretty much too obvious, and I got caught with gay porn on my computer at 13, and I told my grandmother I like guys at 15, I got more or less outed at a party at 16, so it was never a secret  I just lived as gay. I never actively hid it, I was never in the closet. In a way I'm sort of a lucky non-straight boy: I'm both masculine enough to not come off as "too gay" and thus offensive to the more neanderthal crowd, yet I've got enough fem in me where it's obvious I'm gay if you spend more than 20 minutes around me. So I've gotten spared a lot of the shit gay men who pass as straight and fem gays who are more "stereotypical" have had to deal with.
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Get outta my head.
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Jan 5th, 2013, 03:44 PM
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#184
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,952
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavia P.
In a way I'm sort of a lucky non-straight boy: I'm both masculine enough to not come off as "too gay" and thus offensive to the more neanderthal crowd, yet I've got enough fem in me where it's obvious I'm gay if you spend more than 20 minutes around me. So I've gotten spared a lot of the shit gay men who pass as straight and fem gays who are more "stereotypical" have had to deal with.
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Oh same here!
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Jan 5th, 2013, 07:11 PM
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#185
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Leather bar
Posts: 3,460
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Re: Coming out...
We're so much alike Dominic 
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Get outta my head.
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Jan 5th, 2013, 07:53 PM
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#186
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Out in Alaska
Posts: 10,584
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Re: Coming out...
This thread took me back to one of my most favorite disco songs......
I'm Coming Out by Diana Ross
http://youtu.be/F-mjl63e0ms
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"I USED to be Snow White....but I drifted."
MAE WEST
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Jan 5th, 2013, 08:21 PM
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#187
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 18,251
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Re: Coming out...
^ Indeed, she's one of my favorite singers! That's actually my 2nd favourite from her, my fave is Upside Down.
__________________
MIRJANA LUCIC ☢ | SAM STOSUR ☯ | MARTINA HINGIS ♚ | DANIELA HANTUCHOVA ✯ | OLGA PUCHKOVA ❤
“The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.”
Thucydices
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Jan 11th, 2013, 10:47 AM
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#188
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-
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Adult life
Posts: 26,376
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elwin.
I DID IT
Finally told my parents and sister. Still have to tell my brother though because he's in NY.
Told them to sit down, almost broke down in tears. So i told it pretty fast. I said; i have something important to tell. I'm gay. I felt so nervous and awful, but they were totally supportive.
I actually don't know how i feel right now. I feel happy, but i also feel kinda sad.
Honestly, i don't know how i managed to tell it. It wasn't planned and i still wanted to wait for a while.
I feel so weird 
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9 days since i came out of the closet. I feel like i'm in an emotional rollercoaster since i came out
And damn, i still feel so weird. I kept crying like a little girl yesterday  First time i cried since i came out of the closet. I've had some nasty reactions from friends, that has been really tough me.
I know everybody says it's a process and that things are going to get better. But it's double. The last 9 days have been the best of my life but also the worst days of my life at the same time  I really want to accept myself for who i am, but it's killing me that i still don't feel happy 
Everybody tells me that it's going to be fine eventually, but i just want this to end  It's killing me. I'm not even able to work at school or sth, such a mess.
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Last edited by Elwin. : Jan 11th, 2013 at 10:56 AM.
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Jan 11th, 2013, 11:00 AM
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#189
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Most Loved Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 10,871
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elwin.
9 days since i came out of the closet.
And damn, i still feel so weird. I kept crying like a little girl yesterday  First time i cried since i came out of the closet. I've had some nasty reactions from friends, that has been really tough me.
I know everybody says it's a process and that things are going to get better. But it's double. The last 9 days have been the best of my life but also the worst days of my life at the same time  I really want to accept myself for who i am, but it's killing me that i still don't feel happy 
Everybody tells me that it's going to be fine eventually, but i just want this to end 
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A bit surprised that some of your friends would have a problem with it.  I don't know that many Dutch people in their 20s who are still that backward. But then again I live in the Randstad.
I don't think feeling happy is a switch you turn on. Or a state that even exists. Coming out was just the first step, eventually you get used to it, and you worry less, you think about it less. And that will make your life a lot more comfortable and unrestricted.
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Jan 11th, 2013, 01:56 PM
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#190
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Leather bar
Posts: 3,460
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Re: Coming out...
It's a process Elwin. You'll feel better eventually. The friends who reject you will either find it in themselves to improve as human beings, or you find new friends. You're emotionally vulnerable and insecure because you are in a place in your life you're not comfortable in yet. It WILL get better, I promise, but it takes time.
The whole friends thing is why I know never to associate with people I'm not sure would accept my orientation and I know my several gay friends were the same. You have to test the waters before you come out to avoid negative backlash. But even with that-----you have your family and your new boy. They love you and accept you. I'm sure not all of your friends have rejected you. And you'll make a lot more new friends now that you're out. Keep positive babe 
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Get outta my head.
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Jan 11th, 2013, 02:31 PM
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#191
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Set me free, leave me be.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 15,746
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kworb
A bit surprised that some of your friends would have a problem with it.  I don't know that many Dutch people in their 20s who are still that backward. But then again I live in the Randstad.
I don't think feeling happy is a switch you turn on. Or a state that even exists. Coming out was just the first step, eventually you get used to it, and you worry less, you think about it less. And that will make your life a lot more comfortable and unrestricted.
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Definitely! There is that initial "weight off my shoulders" feeling which is just amazing but then after that there's the whole process of becoming more comfortable, as you say. So it takes a while but as long as you are surrounded by people who love and accept you for who you are, then it should eventually become much "easier" and the happier you will feel in yourself.
__________________
Official Kleenex Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
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Jan 11th, 2013, 05:28 PM
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#192
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,952
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavia P.
We're so much alike Dominic 
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 I know
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Jan 11th, 2013, 05:31 PM
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#193
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,952
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elwin.
I kept crying like a little girl yesterday  First time i cried since i came out of the closet. I've had some nasty reactions from friends, that has been really tough me.
Everybody tells me that it's going to be fine eventually, but i just want this to end  It's killing me. I'm not even able to work at school or sth, such a mess.
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Oh my what kind of reactions? That's really not cool. If any of my friends hadn't reacted well, I probably would have not wanted them as friends anymore..
Why? What's wrong? Cause you're too emotional? 
Honestly, I know for sure it will get much better, but if we can help or give advice to make it easier during this process, I'm sure you would appreciate that.
Last edited by Dominic : Jan 11th, 2013 at 05:37 PM.
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Jan 11th, 2013, 05:56 PM
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#194
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Hingistan
Posts: 11,191
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Re: Coming out...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elwin.
9 days since i came out of the closet. I feel like i'm in an emotional rollercoaster since i came out
And damn, i still feel so weird. I kept crying like a little girl yesterday  First time i cried since i came out of the closet. I've had some nasty reactions from ex-friends, that has been really tough me.
I know everybody says it's a process and that things are going to get better. But it's double. The last 9 days have been the best of my life but also the worst days of my life at the same time  I really want to accept myself for who i am, but it's killing me that i still don't feel happy 
Everybody tells me that it's going to be fine eventually, but i just want this to end  It's killing me. I'm not even able to work at school or sth, such a mess.
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Fixed
it does take time to figure out how you fit into the world. You'll find good people to surround yourself with and accept yourself more and more all the time. 
__________________
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