Me: What you mean?
Necee: Taruy had called me this morning and he said that he was headed up to the church house. Can you talk?
Me: Now what's going on?
Necee: Yeah, Taruy was saying something about you and him having to talk to Deacon Brown about something with Jarian. He didn't really go into detail but he was hinting some things. But I know how Taruy is. He just messy. So I just wanted to ask you.
Me: Taruy is something else. Look, I'mma call you later on today. I just got a lot to do. You know my mom is in jail right?
Necee: Omg! I'm so sorry.
Me: Yeah, so Eric and I are putting things in storage today and tomorrow because we gotta be out by Monday. But I'll call you later alright?
Me: Bye [CLICK]
What is he trying to do? Ruin my life?
I drive home and go into the house. I start boxing things and working on areas that hadn't been touched. My room will be last.
I call my brother Eric to see if we can use his dad's van to put the stuff in.
3:20pm] Hey Dante
Me: Hey can we use your dad's van?
Eric: I already got it covered. My dad took me to rent a U-Haul truck this morning. He said he needed his van. I'm still working with him though. I gotta go.
Me: When are you coming?
Eric: Around 5:30 or so. Gotta Go! [CLICK]
Well that's good. That'll make it much easier.
I walked into the living room when it suddenly dawned on me. Where's my dog gonna go? Well I'll just move with my granny for a month or so and work a temp job to save money. Princess can come with me there. And then I'll move to Dallas and Join CFC. I just need to make sure that it's okay with Granny.
I go and answer the door.
Greg: Damn, what the fuck is going on in here?
I noticed Kardar with him as they walked in.
Me: You don't remember? Mom is in jail and we can't afford to stay here. So we gotta move.
Greg: Oh yeah that's messed up.
Greg looks at Kardar.
Greg: Well, aren't you gonna speak nigga?
Kardar: Oh Waddup Dante. [he said looking at me]
Me: What's up Kardar.
Greg: Well I just came to get some grub. Then we out ya'lls way.
Me: Oh there's some left over burritos from Rosa's in the refrigerator.
Greg: Dat's wassup. I'll be back
He went into the kitchen and left Kardar behind.
I continued to work on things in the living room
Kardar: Hey Dante.
Me: Wassup? [ I said as I continued working]
Kardar: I'm sorry bro.
Me: Oh you good dude. It's cool.
Kardar: Naw farreal. I'm sorry for how I been treatn you.
I turn towards him and give him my undivided attention.
Kardar: Yo brother was telln me about you. He said that you're a church boy and shit. That you be reading the bible and praying and shit. He said you even prayed for him while he was locked up. I respect that. My granny be tryna get me to go to church but I ain't ready for all that shit. So I got mad respect for you ya feel me? I'm really sorry man.
Me: Hey I forgive you.
He walks towards me and gives me dap. He pulls me in for a slight hug.
At the same time Greg walks in.
Greg: What the fuck I tell you about puttn yo hands on my brother?
Me: Greg, it's okay. He was just apologizing to me.
Greg: Oh aight. Well we out then Dante.
As they were walking out the door I get a text msg.
I look at my phone. Jarian.
5:13pm] Who is this?
Me: It's Dante lol. Ya phone trippn?
Me: What's up.
Jarian: Omg who were you talking to on my phone?
Me: What you mean? Weren't you texting me this week?
Jarian: Naw, I been grounded from my phone and I just got it back like an hour ago. My parents had my phone. I saw how they were trying to erase all these text msgs, but they didn't do a good job. What did you say?
Me: I mean, I was just trying to see when I had to meet your dad at the church. That's all. I didn't say nothing extra.
Jarian: Well I hope not because my dad is being extra nosy now. Well hey gotta go. I'm not suppose to be talking to you. Bye [CLICK]
Wow, so his dad was texting me the whole time! I hope I didn't say something off the wall!
I search through the phone to make sure I didn't text anything inappropriate.
As I was doing that I got a text msg........Lamonte.
5:22pm] Hey Dante. I've been waiting on you to text me or call me all day. You're probably still mad or you've noticed that a page from your notebook has been torn out. Well I can explain. If you will just give me a chance. Let me know when you get this.
I take a deep breath. I really just wanted to forget about all of this. But I just can't resist. I'm trying, but I have to text him back.
5:30pm] Hey Lamonte. I got your text msg.
Lamonte: Dante! Can you talk for a minute?
I really didn't want to answer but I did.
Me: What's up.
Lamonte: Listen. I know that you're probably upset with me. And I know you're going through a lot right now. And I'm sorry for tearing that page out of your notebook.
Me: Why did you do that!?
Lamonte: Dante, calm down okay?
Me: No I'm not going to calm down! You don't understand Lamonte! This is not easy to deal with!
Lamonte: Well let me just talk to you.
Me: Okay...go ahead!
Lamonte: Dante, let me come and get you so I can e--
Me: NO LAMONTE! Tell me now! Tell me why you putting me through this! Why did you tear that out of my notebook! Why are you making me feel this way! JUST TELL ME!
Me: You're suppose to be my friend! I've been nothing but a good friend to you! I never did anything less than that! So tell my why!
Lamonte: [a slight pause and deep breath] Dante. Please Calm down okay? Listen. Just let me come and Get you and--
Me: [I started speaking over him] NO I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT! Just Leave Me Alone And I'll Leave You Alone! [I could feel my voice quivering]
I fell to my knees and start crying and praying to God.
"GOD! Please Hear My Cry! I Want To Live For You! I'm Trying to do the right thing! I'm soo confused right now! I want to Live Holy And Be Pleasing To You! I really Like Lamonte, but I Felt Like I Had to Do that To Please You God! But It Didn't Feel Good!
Why God!? Why Does It Feel Right To Talk To Him, But It's Soo Wrong!?
Please Answer Me God!?
I get no Response......