[Cajka]

Originally Posted by Kart

Without diagnostic criteria, how could you be sure it's under reported ?

I agree with your last sentence. Though I will freely admit that I reserve my sympathy on this matter for people that can't function in day to day life because they're so anxious.

As I indicated above, I doubt many people that claim to be socially phobic fit into that group.

The fact is that everybody gets stressed and nervous at times. It's part of normal life and I'm against labelling normal behaviour as pathological.

Of course. Anxiety disorder is a serious problem. Anyone who had any form of panic attack knows that it's one of the worst thing that you can experience. It's much worse than being nervous or simply scared. When it comes to diagnosis, I think it's actually easy to recognize phobias, because the common fears are not even close to real phobias.

[Kart]

My take on the psychiatrists is that they have a difficult job - assessing mood, risk and response to treatment must be extremely subjective.

That said, I suspect it's no different from other branches of medicine - ie. pattern recognition. You make a diagnosis, treat it and then if things get better then you carry on. If they don't then you re-evaluate.

To some extent, I suppose it doesn't matter so much if you understand what's going on underneath as long as people get better.

[dsanders06]

I have similar problems, but I'm not sure mine is really a social anxiety as such... it's more a deeper insecurity which probably comes from when I had clinical depression when I was 16. Unlike other posters in this thread, I actually am pretty talkative/confident with new people/in big groups/at parties, etc... basically, I don't really worry too much what people I've just met / people I'll never see again think of me, the fear/insecurity is more what they'll think of me once they get to know me more and know my personality more intimately. And it's been REALLY debilitating for me, to such an extent that I had to drop out of university in March this year after only 6 months. I'm just RIDICULOUSLY sensitive to criticism - like, last year when I first started at uni, there was a big of group of us in the block of flats I was in who always hung out together, and even though I was getting on with most people, there was one person who I thought I was picking up that he didn't like me or thought I was annoying, and just the thought of that one person not liking me was enough to drive me crazy in my head for weeks (I think subconsciously the fear was that everyone would soon think like he did). And there'd be loads of seemingly-trivial incidents which I'd totally blow out of proportion in my head... like one time just before last Christmas, a group of us were watching X Factor, and a girl who I wasn't even THAT close to just said "shut up" to me (I was talking while someone was performing I think, or something like that), and just that cut so deep that I spent the next two days isolating myself from everyone and staying alone in my room It was only really months later when I was at counselling that I could start to see these types of things more rationally and put them in proper proportion.

Eventually, towards the end of my time there, I was becoming such an insecure mess that the relationship I was in was just totally destroyed (ironically, the fact I was so insecure and fearful about him rejecting me and constantly seeking reassurance, actually itself led to him rejecting me because he just couldn't cope). And then I spent the next few months feeling so depressed I didn't socialise AT ALL... it's only really been the last couple of months that I started gradually rebuilding my life and going out occasionally with schoolfriends, etc. I'm hoping to restart at uni next September.

To anyone else suffering from something similar, I'd definitely advise them to go to counselling asap... I know from my experience that the longer you leave it, the more bad habits you create/entrench and the harder/longer the process to undo them is. Also, don't expect immediate results from counselling either - it really took me 4-5 months of sessions to get anywhere, because we really had to go through basically my whole childhood and last couple of years in order to really understand why and where it developed it from, before we could figure out how to move forward.

[Apoleb]

Originally Posted by Kart

To some extent, I suppose it doesn't matter so much if you understand what's going on underneath as long as people get better.

I think it matters in the sense that 1) the subjectivity in the diagnosis is one of the results of having no clue of what's going underneath. If the pathogenesis and etiology are found out, we will probably have a very different list of psychiatric diseases with a much more organic way of formulating them and find out who has them and who doesn't 2) in terms of moving the treatments further in research.

Of course I'm not slighting psychiatrists because of many of them are in this field for this very purpose (at least the academic ones), but I personally am not too hung up at this moment about what constitutes "major depression" or "social phobia".

[Shadowcat]

Yes I agree with some these posters here, help is important if not it will continue and eat you alive!

[kaiafan]

I've always been a nervous person.I'm not able to talk properly without sweating or stuttering in front of people.Yet this frightens me of going school. But last year I had a serious mental illness(psychosis).I was cured in a mental hospital for a month.Used Zyprexa and now I'm using Abilify.Since then I've become more nervous in social situations and also it turned to a social phobia.When I'm outside even with my family or friends,I'm getting frightened of other people as if they might do me harm.It's not always but causes me not wanna go outside of home.Sometimes I feel I'm getting better but also think if I don't go school or outside,I can't get better.

I somehow think my anxiety in social situations is about I pressurized myself so much.Never showed people the real me.One of the reasons is I'm gay and in childhood other ones made fun of my feminin behaviour(and now the traces are hardly found).I thought too much about what people was thinking about me,still doing.There is also another handicap in the future.That's about the military service.Since our politicians are not really ambitious about cognizing 'conscientious objection', I have to do military serve after age of 20.And I'm brooding about it.School is both my saviour and my killer.

My doctor is saying about my anxiety in social situations,that it's my natural behaviour and I don't have to change it.But how can I live with this?Maybe I should get used to it and cliché but maybe time is the best medicine.

[Barrie_Dude]

I am one who suffers from this as well

[Q-Jo]

I do have it, unfortunately.

[Nicolás89]

I always thought I had this huge problem with social anxiety but now that I get to read your experiences and see how much some of you struggle in your everyday life with it I think I have a mild form of anxiety compared to you.

I'm 22 and I do avoid some social interactions and get nervous in time to time when I meet new people but when it comes to hanging out with friends, family, coworkers, giving presentations in college or for clients I don't have a problem. I really get nervous in parties sometimes though and I tend "self medicate" with alcohol to feel more confortable. My problems get better or worse depending on my moods because I'm bipolar but I don't directly relate my anxiety to it I much relate it to my naturally shy personality.

[Pops Maellard]

I wrote this on Facebook just earlier:

I don't have many people I'd call a friend but even if I did I'd still feel no different. The problem is I don't love myself or believe deep down that I deserve happiness.

"Everyone has heard that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you."

[Shadowcat]

Originally Posted by FlameOn

I wrote this on Facebook just earlier:

Are you okay? Do you want to talk?

[Pops Maellard]

Originally Posted by Shadowcat

Are you okay? Do you want to talk?

Nah I'm OK. I just need to figure out how to love myself that's all .

[cowsonice]

I think I have social anxiety or anxiety in general. I'm fine with public speaking, but I hate hanging out with friends because I got very self-conscious about my mannerisms and looks when I was younger. I think I have an avoidant personality, above everything else.

My mom always criticized me for not doing this or not doing that (basic social graces in her eyes) and always compared me to my friends & peers, or whenever I felt bad because of a messy friendship, my mom would always say "Look at you. There's a reason why your friend did that. You're ________." So then I decided that friends were far less important than my studies, and so the topsy-turviness of my priorities have manifested to me becoming the biggest worrier among my peers which alienates me even more .

Now I (unsuccessfully) find ways to skip school and to avoid interaction because I dread dealing with people.

[Shadowcat]

Originally Posted by FlameOn

Nah I'm OK. I just need to figure out how to love myself that's all .

I have the same problem too. You will never happy about anything if you are not happy with yourself.

[Mikey.]

Originally Posted by FlameOn

I wrote this on Facebook just earlier: