Here's the second part
“Oh no! Why me? What did I do to deserve this miserable fate?”
she thought having realized that she had just eaten her 12th and last Snickers bar. The day had just begun and everything was falling apart already. She decided to drown her sorrow with the sweet, majestic liquor of the gods, Coca-Cola. The taste was so good that she could almost hear the angels sing hallelujah, as she took a sip from that divine liquid; “Ah, at last, life is beautiful again”.
Now that her sugar levels were sky-high, Vika was ready to take a shower, but on her way to the bathroom, she stumbled on the coffee table. Her drama queen skills took action: she waved her hands in the air, while mimicking a dramatic slow motion fall. She considered adding loud groaning, due to the supposed pain, but there was nobody there to witness her outstanding performance, so what was the point? She would just have looked like a weird person. As she got up, while still limping (old habits die hard), Azarenka screamed desperately “Oh no, the pain is too much, I’m going to have to withdraw from this shower”.
Remembering that in today’s semi-final she wouldn't have to face the terminator, who scared the shit out of her, AKA Serena Williams, nor the hysterical, psycho, skinny though gigantic skunk, AKA Big Foot (she could never force herself to even think that bitch’s name); a sudden feeling of bliss overcame her.
She knew that the terminator would destroy her in the final, but there was a silver lining to this; seeing the humiliating defeat of her eternal enemy first. She could already hear the desperate screams and miss perfect’s royal blood spilling on the court. With these thoughts a huge grin appeared on her face as she left her hotel room. There she found Nadal waiting for the elevator too.
“Hey Rafa” Azarenka greeted him in a cheerful manner, as she couldn't hide her excitement for the bloodbath that was to come.
“Holla” Rafa answered.
“How are you doing today?” she asked.
“Yeah, I like tortillas too” he replied
“Um, okay…” Vika said, while starting to freak out a little bit.
Their conversation ended with the elevator doors opening. Azarenka was not happy to see Serena, Novak and You Know Who standing there. The feeling seemed to be mutual as Big Foot was laughing pretty loudly at something the other two were saying, but stopped abruptly at the sight of Azarenka’s face.
“Hello” Azarenka said, while entering the elevator and looking at everybody but Sharapova. Everyone greeted the newcomers, some with more enthusiasm than others.
“Oh, isn't this peachy! Obviously, the universe wasn't satisfied with me being in an elevator with a weird person who wants to spank me, and having to play it cool in front of Serena, even though I’m the definition of NOT cool at the moment. No, of course not, I also have to endure the presence of The Wicked Witch of Belarus. If only I had a bazooka with me right now!”
Maria thought trying not to look at Vika, knowing that she would get even more pissed, if that was possible.
“So guys are you stressed for today’s match, I’m really curious to see who’s going to win” Azarenka said with a smirk. Suddenly Maria started to feel the blood rushing to her cheeks “Thanks for your concern but I’m not stressed at all” she snapped at her.
“Are you sure?” Azarenka insisted - “I mean if I were you I’d be kind of stressed, well a LOT actually. How many years has it been since you've beaten her again, my memory is kind of blurry…”
“No, I’m sure that I’m fine. Thanks, again!” Maria answered a little bit louder than she had intended.
“OK girls, stop it already. It’s just a game, besides we all know who’s gonna be the winner in the end, there is no point fighting.” Serena said in an attempt to calm them down -“And either way it's not the end of the world if she loses. I mean nobody’s gonna punish Maria, it’s not like she’s gonna get spanked for it or something, right? ” she continued while laughing, trying to make light of the situation.
Djokovic burst into a hysterical though not quite authentic laughter “Why…uh…what…what are you talking about? What makes you say that? ...This doesn't make any sense! Why would anyone want to spank her…well I’m not saying she’s unspankable or something, I’m sure many people would want…uh that …it’s just that it would be so, so , SO inappropriate!”
“OK, what’s wrong with you today? Why are you talking like that?” Maria asked having freaked out completely now.
“What do you mean? I’m fine.” he answered.
“Yeah, I can see that!”
“OK, what’s happening here? What’s going on between you two?” Serena demanded.
“NOTHING!” yelled both of them at the same time.
Suddenly the lights flickered and the elevator stopped abruptly.