TennisForum.com - Reply to Topic

Thread: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment! Reply to Thread
Title:
Message:
Trackback:
Send Trackbacks to (Separate multiple URLs with spaces) :
Post Icons
You may choose an icon for your message from the following list:
 

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the TennisForum.com forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



  Additional Options
Miscellaneous Options

  Topic Review (Newest First)
Jun 30th, 2015 04:15 AM
VeeJJ
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Tindr* is basically snap chat for guys you're interested in. It has all the potential to be good. But at the end of it you're left with guys who can't have a conversation or are just on it to waste time. Live meets and stuff are always gonna trump this online bs. Sorry bouts it.
Jun 29th, 2015 06:41 PM
Bismarck.
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Has anybody here actually had success with Tinder?
Jun 9th, 2015 03:15 AM
Mikey.
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam L View Post
Really? How do you know? Let me PM you.
Because I know what they look like! I've even seen them in the pic thread.
Jun 9th, 2015 02:41 AM
Sam L
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikey. View Post
I match with so many people on Tinder but hardly anyone ever talks.

I've seen some TF people on there too.
Really? How do you know? Let me PM you.
Jun 9th, 2015 02:35 AM
Mikey.
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

I match with so many people on Tinder but hardly anyone ever talks.

I've seen some TF people on there too.
Jun 9th, 2015 12:51 AM
Sam L
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Tinder is for gays too? Maybe I should get on tinder.
Jun 8th, 2015 10:38 PM
moby
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Rant: My match percentage on Tinder is like under 1% of the people I swipe.
Jun 2nd, 2015 04:49 PM
Nicolás89
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Med.Nico View Post
That's exactly what I meant, he needed it. You didn't do him any harm, the complete opposite

About him saying that "he wants me forever in his life but just as a friend" and that he couldn't offer me a relationship and blah blah blah, like he expected me to fall in love with him and doesn't want to hurt my feelings (?), I honestly thought out lout "Who does he think he is?" That's normal. He just doesn't want you to keep ignoring him. He is not upset by what happened, he is rather upset by how you have dealt with it
I haven't done anything really drastic though. This incident happened 2 weekends ago. He wanted to go out this weekend and I declined, I don't think one week without seeing each other is such a big deal, I've been only just avoiding discussing the topic because I don't feel there's more to it than just what it was.

Honestly I'm way more upset that he believes I am in love with him or that this incident means more to me than just something naugthy we did, I hate being put in a situation where I might be seen as vulnerable, I know it is shitty of me to think like that but it is what it is.

Anyway, we both want to clear the air, so hopefully this would make our friendship even stronger
Jun 2nd, 2015 04:04 PM
Suspiciousalpaca
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicolás89 View Post
I would like to point out that we hooked up in a very emotional date for him, he broke up with his bf a couple of months ago and that night was going to be their 3 year anniversary and also it was his birthday. Personally I think he was feeling lonely and vulnerable and I was horny and drunk. This makes things weirder for me.
That's exactly what I meant, he needed it. You didn't do him any harm, the complete opposite

About him saying that "he wants me forever in his life but just as a friend" and that he couldn't offer me a relationship and blah blah blah, like he expected me to fall in love with him and doesn't want to hurt my feelings (?), I honestly thought out lout "Who does he think he is?" That's normal. He just doesn't want you to keep ignoring him. He is not upset by what happened, he is rather upset by how you have dealt with it
Jun 2nd, 2015 03:43 PM
Nicolás89
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kasey View Post
What is the truth gurl?
I thought hooking up could be used to describe what I said in the first post?

We most definitely didn't have sex.
Jun 2nd, 2015 03:30 PM
Kasey
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicolás89 View Post
I fooled around with a very good friend of mine, we didn't have sex but there was touching and stuff
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicolás89 View Post
I would like to point out that we hooked up in a very emotional date for him.
What is the truth gurl?
Jun 2nd, 2015 04:12 AM
Nicolás89
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

I would like to point out that we hooked up in a very emotional date for him, he broke up with his bf a couple of months ago and that night was going to be their 3 year anniversary and also it was his birthday. Personally I think he was feeling lonely and vulnerable and I was horny and drunk. This makes things weirder for me.
Jun 2nd, 2015 03:55 AM
Nicolás89
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by shap_half View Post
You need to use this as an opportunity for personal growth. Get over yourself and go back to being friends with this dude. If he's a very good friend, perhaps you would value that relationship more than whatever awkwardness currently exists between the two of you. But, hey, it's not so easy. It happened with a colleague of mine. We hooked up. He got super weird. I finally called him out on it. And he's still being super weird every time we see each other. We hooked up in 2013.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jameshazza View Post
Tbh like shap half I've mainly only ever been on the other side of the coin. I had a class mate towards the end ofmy school years that couldn't bring himself to speak to me, or even to give me a slight nod when I walked past. We ended up drunkenly doing stuff after my 18th birthday party.

Personally speaking I was over it as soon as it happened really, I understood though that he was maybe struggling with his sexuality, even reached out, but ultimately the awkwardness was out of my control. If you're the one that has the issue, you're the only one that can deal with it really.

First advice would be to break the ice, if you ever hang out together alone, I would arrange to do some of that. Any awkwardness won't go away if you keep avoiding him. You'll just have to swallow the bullet. It might take a few times for any awkwardness to go away. Can I ask why you're embarassed? Takes two to tango, if you do really want to keep him as your friend you'll just have to put it behind you. Also, I wouldn't try to discuss it with him really, if you're both trying to maintain your normal relationship, then it's really better off not discussing it. Some things don't need said.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Med.Nico View Post
Sexual "episodes" have weired up a few friendships of mine. Sure things will be a bit weird, but if it happened, that means that there was a prior sexual tension between you two, it will be only another kind of weirdness. Another point, if you say that he "he says he doesn't want things to get weird between us and wishes things could be as normal as always," please don't be self-conscious about that and about yourself. That only means that he needed this moment and that you did good (maybe even great )
Well, thank you for sharing your experiences. I know a handful of friends who have been through something like this, so it's nice to know that it's not the end of the world and that I'm not a whore.

Regarding what you've said, one of the reasons why I feel weird is because I'm afraid of what other people might think of me if they find out, you know how judgemental people is, some friends saw us kissing so I'm afraid of gossiping. However, the main reason why I feel weird is because literally yesterday my friend wrote me this extensive facebook letter telling me that "he wants me forever in his life but just as a friend" and that he couldn't offer me a relationship and blah blah blah, like he expected me to fall in love with him and doesn't want to hurt my feelings (?), I honestly thought out lout "Who does he think he is?", it upset me his attitude, definitely a side of him I didn't want to know.
Jun 2nd, 2015 02:45 AM
Suspiciousalpaca
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicolás89 View Post
So, a couple of weeks ago I fooled around with a very good friend of mine, we didn't have sex but there was touching and stuff. I had fun, I admit it but I inmediately regretted what happened when I went home the next day, now I've been trying my hardest to avoid him because I'm embarrased, he says he doesn't want things to get weird between us and wishes things could be as normal as always and I wish that too, but I'm such a complex person it's really hard for me to separate the physical and the emotional, though that doesn't mean I want to pursue a romantic or even a physical relationship with him, I like him as my friend.

Thoughts?
Sexual "episodes" have weired up a few friendships of mine. Sure things will be a bit weird, but if it happened, that means that there was a prior sexual tension between you two, it will be only another kind of weirdness. Another point, if you say that he "he says he doesn't want things to get weird between us and wishes things could be as normal as always," please don't be self-conscious about that and about yourself. That only means that he needed this moment and that you did good (maybe even great )
Jun 2nd, 2015 02:44 AM
jameshazza
Re: Dating Thread - Ranting, Bitching, Story-telling, Advice, and of course Judgment!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicolás89 View Post
So, a couple of weeks ago I fooled around with a very good friend of mine, we didn't have sex but there was touching and stuff. I had fun, I admit it but I inmediately regretted what happened when I went home the next day, now I've been trying my hardest to avoid him because I'm embarrased, he says he doesn't want things to get weird between us and wishes things could be as normal as always and I wish that too, but I'm such a complex person it's really hard for me to separate the physical and the emotional, though that doesn't mean I want to pursue a romantic or even a physical relationship with him, I like him as my friend.

Thoughts?
Tbh like shap half I've mainly only ever been on the other side of the coin. I had a class mate towards the end ofmy school years that couldn't bring himself to speak to me, or even to give me a slight nod when I walked past. We ended up drunkenly doing stuff after my 18th birthday party.

Personally speaking I was over it as soon as it happened really, I understood though that he was maybe struggling with his sexuality, even reached out, but ultimately the awkwardness was out of my control. If you're the one that has the issue, you're the only one that can deal with it really.

First advice would be to break the ice, if you ever hang out together alone, I would arrange to do some of that. Any awkwardness won't go away if you keep avoiding him. You'll just have to swallow the bullet. It might take a few times for any awkwardness to go away. Can I ask why you're embarassed? Takes two to tango, if you do really want to keep him as your friend you'll just have to put it behind you. Also, I wouldn't try to discuss it with him really, if you're both trying to maintain your normal relationship, then it's really better off not discussing it. Some things don't need said.
This thread has more than 15 replies. Click here to review the whole thread.

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome