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View Full Version : If you had to have sex with one of them


Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 07:55 PM
Which one would you select. You are locked in a dungeon and you have to make a decision: one of the three. Suicide is not an option. I'm tired of all these serious, downer political threads, so this is an alternative. So, which one would you select?

Jetta
Sep 16th, 2002, 07:57 PM
Originally posted by Helen Lawson
Suicide is not an option.

awwwwww damnit. :(

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:02 PM
Ok, I will start. Saddam Hussein is not going to happen. The fact that he has been with a prostitute is even more disgusting. So, I'm left with Tony Blair or "W." Personally, I think W is cute in strange sort of way, I mean, compared to the others. I always have thought that Blair probably has bad body odor and perhaps athletes foot. So, put it all together, and "W" is my selection.

Zamboni
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:06 PM
Tony Blair, but that's a negative choice, cos I really really hate Bushbush, and I hate Saddam too.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:12 PM
This is the type of analysis I am looking for! Thanks, adnil.

Come on posters. I think many of you are leaving the dungeon when you know those are NOT the rules. It is not like you actually have to sleep with the person, it is just a game. And I notice someone selected Hussein! So, what was the reasoning?

Cybelle Darkholme
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:16 PM
This is totally unreasonable! Tony Blair! George Dubya Bush! And Saddam! Why not throw a three legged goat in the mix! Hell bring on the goat I say! Better yet let them make quality time with the goat, poor thing.

I say we fill the cell with water and let the chips fall where they may.

griffin
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:17 PM
I think I have been scarred by the very idea.

(cybelle, I am reporting you for cruelty to goats)

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:25 PM
The goats would give all of you too easy an option. I am trying to totally gross people out and at the same time force them to make a really rough decision. I see Tony Blair has garnered another vote and has taken the lead. Physically, he is probably the least "yucky" but I cannot get over my personal belief that he smells.

G-Ha
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:31 PM
OK, OK...I selected Hussein. What?! I prefer dark-haired guys...although I'm not sure I could get beyond the big, wooly moustache.

George W. seems like he'd be a complete bore in the sack...I'd probably fall asleep. Although, being unconscious may not be such a bad thing considering these three as options. And I can't even picture Tony Blair having sex with anyone, let alone me.

Hurley
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:47 PM
I selected Blair. He's the least repulsive-looking, -acting, -thinking etc. He cleans up pretty nice, though I agree with Helen -- a bath first. Or better yet, a steam-cleaning.

[fires up the power washer] Hold still! :D

Scotso
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:48 PM
I would have to go with Blair. He's the least minging of the group.

Josh
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:53 PM
I'd rather stay locked in the dungeon.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:54 PM
Well, I see Mr. Blair has taken and maintained the lead. He's our very own Serena Williams! I knew Blair might be too easy an option for the easily-grossed out. But I thought "W" v. Saddam would be just too, too cruel.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:56 PM
Ok, staying locked in the dungeon is not an option either. If you cannot make a decision, then you are stuck in a four-way.

veryborednow
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:56 PM
Tony Blair's a catholic and doesn't believe in contraception, hense the 4 kids.

but I guess the 4 kids means he's gotta be doing something right ;)

just imagine the pillow talk though ... *shudders*

Monica_Rules
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:58 PM
LMAO!

Josh
Sep 16th, 2002, 08:58 PM
Originally posted by Helen Lawson
Ok, staying locked in the dungeon is not an option either. If you cannot make a decision, then you are stuck in a four-way.

LMAO, omg, all my fantasies are coming true! :rolleyes:

Cybelle Darkholme
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:00 PM
But Griffin, I love goats! I truly do! Goat curry in jamaica is absolutely to die for!

Keith
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:09 PM
I chose George W. I dont know why. The lesser of the three evils

*Izzy*
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:21 PM
Is there an "I'd rather poke out my eyes with razors and drink ammonia" option?

No?

Ok then, Blair :p

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:29 PM
Perhaps a way to make this less terrible is to imagine them as normal people, not politician/head of state/despot. Imagine being at a bar and the three of them are there and they are "normal guys." I know, a little hard to picture. If you toss out whatever dislike you have for them as politicians and all, I do think neither Hussein, Bush, nor Blair are really "bad" options just on a physcial plane. None is obese, ancient, or hideously ugly. Certainly not a score to brag about to friends, but not "take this one to my grave" either.

YSL
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:30 PM
I'd make sure that I wasn't in such a position in the first place..

That not OK?

Erm, it'll have to be Blair.. But I'd have to lie back and think of someone attractive at the same time :p

griffin
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:31 PM
Originally posted by cybelledarkholmexx
But Griffin, I love goats! I truly do! Goat curry in jamaica is absolutely to die for!

Currying is one thing, handing the poor beast over to the above mentioned is another :(

;)

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:34 PM
What if I had not included Tony Blair, but inserted Ronald Reagan (pre-illness) instead. Crueler option, or equally cruel?

Cybelle Darkholme
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:35 PM
Hmm you have a point. I think we should all pool our resources and hire that girl from alias to take them all out. She kicks ass in stiletto heels while wearing hot pants and flawless makeup! she rules.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:38 PM
I bet at least one of our choices has a fetish for hot pants and stilettos. Yuck, can you even imagine one of those guys begging you for it as you wear hot pants and stilettos?

YSL
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:38 PM
The non-suicide option was the cruellest of them all...

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:42 PM
Ok, I have an "out" for some of you, should you select it. You can by-pass these three lovelies, but you have to "do it all" with either Teddy Kennedy or Marge Schott.

YSL
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:45 PM
oh gawd...

Even Ann Widdecombe seems more appealing

Crazy Canuck
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:49 PM
Tony Blaire, no contest.

For too many moral reasons I couldn't sleep with Saddam (I'm against pretty much everything he beleives), and doing Bush would be on par with doing a 90 year old senile man.

Blaire it is.

veryborednow
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:51 PM
Even Ann Widdecombe seems more appealing
pre - or - post dye job?

angele87
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:53 PM
I'd have to go with Blair :o

LucasArg
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:55 PM
In South Park movie, Saddam was Satan's lover.

He looked very intensive:p

Blair and Bush are soooooooooooooo unsexy:rolleyes:

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 09:59 PM
See, if Bush was a normal guy, he might be "mercy fuck" material in that he seems sort of lost and all and innocent, and feature for feature he is not terrible looking.

Bush is getting more votes than I thought. Too bad I didn't stick Teddy Kennedy and Marge Schott into the original poll!

YSL
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:03 PM
Originally posted by veryborednow

pre - or - post dye job?

I don't think it'll make a difference, I'll have poked my eyes out by then..

G-Ha
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:07 PM
Thank you...I see someone has finally joined me in doing Saddam (threesome?). I agree with you LucasArg, at least we know he'd be intense, if nothing else.

Sorry, Helen, adding Teddy and Marge wouldn't sway my vote. In fact, those two are enough to make me run towards Saddam's open arms.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:10 PM
LOL! No one can accuse me of not providing enough choices. ;)

Mitzi
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:11 PM
Tony :drool: :drool: :drool:

Double Fault
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:13 PM
It would have to be Saddam Hussein. He'd scream all his secrets out (like where he's hiding all those nasty old weapons)

I'd do it for HUMANITY, but I'd settle for an oil well or two.

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:30 PM
Ok, I was thinking I needed more "options" for our straight men and lesbians here. Ok, I have ONE last option. You can by-pass Hussein, Bush, Blair, Kennedy, and Schott. BUT, to do so, you have to do a three-way with Imelda Marcos and Leona Helmsley, and I mean a "thorough" one. These are the nastiest-looking women I can think of who have no redeeming qualities to their personalities and do not have youth on their side.

Double Fault
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:35 PM
I'd take the Marcos woman. I'm glad you didn't include that horrible wench Maggie Thatcher. Imelda is an angel compared to that monster. I'm off to bed now to dream about Imelda!. What a woman!!!

Helen Lawson
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:42 PM
Do not forget, you have to run off with Leona Helmsley also, she's a package deal with Mrs. Marcos.

I thought about Thatcher, but I thought maybe she'd have some fans or something and she is not really hideously ugly or obese, so I tossed her out as an option!

Jetta
Sep 16th, 2002, 10:51 PM
Originally posted by YSL
The non-suicide option was the cruellest of them all...


LMFAO! so true, so true. ;)

Pamela Shriver
Sep 16th, 2002, 11:04 PM
....well at least BJK isn't on the list <shudder>

Monica@53
Sep 16th, 2002, 11:28 PM
oh dear... i think the answer to that one came too easily for me.... how embarassing!

Josh
Sep 16th, 2002, 11:35 PM
Please share! :D

King Satan
Sep 17th, 2002, 12:05 AM
Give me a six pack and a viagra and i'll do all three of them LOL:D

Monica@53
Sep 17th, 2002, 02:49 AM
NUH-uh-uh-uh Josh, I refuse to divulge...... i'd have to kill you otherwise ;)! geez, what is plain shocking is that I didn't even need time to think about it! hmmmmm..... maybe I have some sort of repressed feelings for this particular political power player who remains nameless (ok, it wasn't saddam, i'll give you that much).... or maybe it's just been too long since I've had a good f*ck!!!! ;)

Crazy Canuck
Sep 17th, 2002, 08:26 AM
I am relieved to see that Tony is getting the most votes, but a wide margin.

Saddam is a little too fanatical for my liking, and Bush is also a little too fanatical for my liking :p

Sadly, one of them is intelligent and the other is less so.


If nothing else, Tony has the brittish accent on his side :D

Mateo Mathieu
Sep 17th, 2002, 01:09 PM
Err... Tony Blair :o

Sam L
Sep 17th, 2002, 01:14 PM
George W. Bush! He is the most powerful man in the world supposedly :rolleyes: I mean in this list he is anyway, Tony is George's little puppy and Saddam could be in a grave any day. So of course Bush!

Barrie_Dude
Sep 17th, 2002, 01:47 PM
This is a fate worse than death! I'd much rather listen to Kathy Lee Gifford sing! (shudders at the thought!):eek:

Helen Lawson
Sep 17th, 2002, 01:51 PM
Maybe we could arrange to pipe in Kathy Lee's music into the dungeon for extra effect. Hey, I have everyone some alternatives, so no one can say there are not enough!

Barrie_Dude
Sep 17th, 2002, 01:52 PM
Originally posted by Helen Lawson
Maybe we could arrange to pipe in Kathy Lee's music into the dungeon for extra effect. Hey, I have everyone some alternatives, so no one can say there are not enough!


:eek: You Are A Cruel, Depraved, Lunatic!:eek:

Helen Lawson
Sep 17th, 2002, 02:00 PM
I cannot say I am surprised by Tony Blair's landslide victory here. I was concerned he would be "too easy" a choice. I guess he was, I must have overestimated the body odor factor or something. I should have stuck Ronald Reagan in there, and seen how the numbers turned out!

Aloysius
Sep 17th, 2002, 04:49 PM
Confession: I've had a crush on Mr. Anthony Blair since I first laid eyes on him. :o ;)

Helen Lawson
Sep 17th, 2002, 05:16 PM
Gross! But at least you were honest. Now I really need someone to confess to having a crush on one of our others.

Barrie_Dude
Sep 17th, 2002, 05:31 PM
Originally posted by Helen Lawson
Gross! But at least you were honest. Now I really need someone to confess to having a crush on one of our others. LMAO! Like who would admit to having a crush on Sadamm Hussein?

Helen Lawson
Sep 17th, 2002, 06:14 PM
By the way, Barrie Dude, you did not make a selection! It is against the rules to visit the dungeon and then not make a choice. I am willing to waive the Kathy Lee music, but time is running out to select. Take one for the team and go with Marge Schott or if you are gay/bi/curious, then experiment with Teddy Kennedy. I know, what a choice. What will they think if no one selects them? If Marge reads this and people have selected a three-way with Leona Helmsley and Imelda Marcos over her, that is sort of the end of the line for any woman, agreed?

ys
Sep 17th, 2002, 06:24 PM
Marcos, as she was 30 years ago could be a treat..:)

Helen Lawson
Sep 17th, 2002, 06:41 PM
Hot stuff! If you have a shoe fetish, then she is you woman.

No, it's the present day Mrs. Marcos. Plus, you have the present day Mrs. Helmsley with her. See, I try to make it fair/equally disgusting for any option.

Big Fat Pink Elephant
Sep 17th, 2002, 07:26 PM
Tony :o