PDA

View Full Version : Why do we put ourselves through it? Relationships and Love?


The_Pov
Feb 7th, 2007, 09:35 PM
Valentines Day has to be the worst day in the whole world! Why can't we just be like animals, for them it's just wham bam thank you m'am?

I've stupidly asked someone over to my house for Valentines, I've liked this guy for so long and he split up with his girlfriend a few months back, but I was involved with someone. Now we're both single my friend said I should go for it. I don't even know if he remembers me asking him, we were drunk and he described it as a "sad lonely hearts slitting wrists session."

I have no idea if he likes me, I only invited him as a friend to watch movies. But it makes me feel sick inside just thinking about it or him, I get so nevous and I just want this feeling to go away. He doesn't even go for girls like me, I'm so not his type. Why am I putting myself through this? Everyday I start having doubts and I want to just stop myself. My mind is divided one part wants him so bad and the other knows this will all end in my tears and I should save myself from that now.

This is the first time I felt this way about anyone, usually I'm persued and I come round to liking them. This is a whole new territory and I hate it!

Why do we put ourselves through this pain?

antonella
Feb 7th, 2007, 09:38 PM
[QUOTE]Why do we put ourselves through this pain?[QUOTE]

Alcohol..

LoveFifteen
Feb 7th, 2007, 09:39 PM
Why do we put ourselves through this pain?

Because having sex with someone that you're in love with is the best thing in the world. :hearts:

tennisIlove09
Feb 7th, 2007, 09:45 PM
We do it because we all want that one person to love and to love us back.
Believe me, even if you guys DO get together, there will still be trying times. Relationships are about work. If you never have to work at it, then you dont have a relationship. You have to talk and communicate and be there for each other, and understand that some days will be bad days and some days will be good days.

Maybe you should ask him again and see what he says. The worst thing that can happen is he will say no ... but then you can move on. The best thing that can happen is that he will say yes ... and things can progress from there.

We put ourselves out there at the risk of getting hurt, but the feeling of being in love is worth the risk.

LudwigDvorak
Feb 7th, 2007, 09:55 PM
Relationships on a platonic/professional level, so I don't lose my mind from complete sanity, that's why I keep those. I don't do the love thing--yet. I figure, I'm 18 and stupid, why bother? Much more important things right now.

Kart
Feb 7th, 2007, 10:26 PM
Why do we put ourselves through this pain?

Because the alternative is worse.

Couver
Feb 7th, 2007, 11:56 PM
Valentines Day has to be the worst day in the whole world! Why can't we just be like animals, for them it's just wham bam thank you m'am?

I've stupidly asked someone over to my house for Valentines, I've liked this guy for so long and he split up with his girlfriend a few months back, but I was involved with someone. Now we're both single my friend said I should go for it. I don't even know if he remembers me asking him, we were drunk and he described it as a "sad lonely hearts slitting wrists session."

I have no idea if he likes me, I only invited him as a friend to watch movies. But it makes me feel sick inside just thinking about it or him, I get so nevous and I just want this feeling to go away. He doesn't even go for girls like me, I'm so not his type. Why am I putting myself through this? Everyday I start having doubts and I want to just stop myself. My mind is divided one part wants him so bad and the other knows this will all end in my tears and I should save myself from that now.

This is the first time I felt this way about anyone, usually I'm persued and I come round to liking them. This is a whole new territory and I hate it!

Why do we put ourselves through this pain?

Cause when it comes to romance and love human beings are idiots, and I think like to pu themselves through hell. :lol:

Good luck with the guy though, I so totally know how you feel btw.

LoveFifteen
Feb 8th, 2007, 12:08 AM
Why do we put ourselves through this pain?

Because it's hard getting tricks to toss my salad! :sad:

The_Pov
Feb 8th, 2007, 12:46 AM
It's so good to know others go through the same thing, even though my friends give me advice and are there for me, I feel all alone, because when it comes down to it, I have to do it all alone. It'll just be me and him on wednesday and in whatever happens after.

alelysafina
Feb 8th, 2007, 12:47 AM
Because the alternative is worse.

:worship: :worship:

AJZ.
Feb 8th, 2007, 12:53 AM
Because... we all want to find our one and only. It's out there for everyone... but you have to stumble and fall, and rise again before you find it. I imagine there's no feeling better... than being someone's one and only.

Because... it'll be worth it some day.

~Eclipsed~
Feb 8th, 2007, 02:33 AM
Wow i'll admit the alcohol thing was not that surprising considering your a girl who probably tends to get hung up over stuff too much.

but YOU having a problem getting a guy truly baffles me! :shrug:

¤CharlDa¤
Feb 8th, 2007, 03:21 AM
We put ourselves out there at the risk of getting hurt, but the feeling of being in love is worth the risk.

Well said Dallas :kiss: Totally true.

SJW
Feb 8th, 2007, 03:39 AM
I know exactly what you mean...this guy and I have been in "awkward" territory for about a year now. I knew he liked me at one point, but it was bad timing for me. He knew I liked him at one point, but it was bad timing for him. Now the tension between us is suffocating.

I do catch myself wondering "what if...?" but oh well. Why don't you think you're his type, you're gorgeous :)

switz
Feb 8th, 2007, 05:20 AM
Unless you're really close friends and can't afford to lose the friendship then you've just got to make a move.

If you're as good looking as people are saying there aren't many blokes who wouldn't at least give you a chance. Don't say the things you're writing on here because that could freak him out but at the same time don't sit around fearing rejection because that's no way to live. it's good for a person to get the taste of rejection once in a while because it makes you a more empathetic person.

switz
Feb 8th, 2007, 05:21 AM
that's not to say you'll be rejected of course.

i'm horrible :o

The_Pov
Feb 8th, 2007, 10:32 AM
I know exactly what you mean...this guy and I have been in "awkward" territory for about a year now. I knew he liked me at one point, but it was bad timing for me. He knew I liked him at one point, but it was bad timing for him. Now the tension between us is suffocating.

I do catch myself wondering "what if...?" but oh well. Why don't you think you're his type, you're gorgeous :)

I'm not his type because all his past girlfriends are short blonde and very english looking, totally different to me. I know I shouldn't measure myself against them but I find myself analysing everything just to try and a find a way to stop myself.

Hope it eventually works out with you and your guy!

controlfreak
Feb 8th, 2007, 10:47 AM
To be honest I think you are making a bad move trying to Valentines-rebound onto this poor guy. It is only by reverting to singledom for an unspecified period that you will conquer your emotional pain and emerge strong enough to start a new relationship. It's like you have a broken foot and are taking painkillers to run a marathon. The foot would be better served by resting until it heals.

God I sound like one of these self-help gurus trying to sell you his book.

Kart
Feb 8th, 2007, 10:49 AM
^ Is that your first serious post on here controlfreak ?

SJW
Feb 8th, 2007, 11:41 AM
I'm not his type because all his past girlfriends are short blonde and very english looking, totally different to me. I know I shouldn't measure myself against them but I find myself analysing everything just to try and a find a way to stop myself.

Hope it eventually works out with you and your guy!

Well maybe he feels like you're out of his league :lol: I say go for it.
Re. "my guy", I'm not totally sure i WANT it to work out eventually. It seems like that ship has sailed. I just wish it wasn't awkward.

égalité
Feb 8th, 2007, 01:24 PM
Because we need to feel loved. And have hot monkey sex :hearts:

controlfreak
Feb 8th, 2007, 02:36 PM
^ Is that your first serious post on here controlfreak ?

No. I was deadly serious when I insulted the Pope in 2003.

"Sluggy"
Feb 8th, 2007, 02:39 PM
Ur probably all gitty about him cause he's one of the only guys in range. same thing happened to Jan in the Brady Bunch, she fell in love with Peter cause he was the only guy her age around. Good luck though, where your tighest pair of jeans and get him some stuff he likes, bat your eyebrows and wiggle your hips! good luck.

Kart
Feb 8th, 2007, 04:26 PM
No. I was deadly serious when I insulted the Pope in 2003.

I missed that one :(.

So it's like every four years or so between them is it - I look forward to 2011.

meyerpl
Feb 10th, 2007, 02:06 AM
Tonight, as I was driving my 13 year-old son home from a school dance, where he gave a girl flowers for the first time, I told him, "Girls will be the cause of both the best and the worst feelings you'll ever have. I guess you can't have one without the other."

miffedmax
Feb 10th, 2007, 03:12 AM
Tonight, as I was driving my 13 year-old son home from a school dance, where he gave a girl flowers for the first time, I told him, "Girls will be the cause of both the best and the worst feelings you'll ever have. I guess you can't have one without the other."

I would have said beer, but I think your answer is good, too.

Couver
Feb 10th, 2007, 04:50 AM
It's odd though. I always thought it would get easier to avoid these feelings as one got older, but it's been the opposite for me. For many reasons I always knew early on I'd be alone for the better part of my life, and from high school onward I had the most impenetrable ice queen persona ever! I never fell for anyone, I didn't even really reach out to befriend anyone. Then just last year, just whack I fell for this guy, and nothing came of it, and now it happend again this year but much stronger. And of course for many reasons nothing will happen with this guy either.

But I'm like WTF, what happend to me? I'm going to have to try to get back my old self this summer. If for nothing else but my sanity.