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Cam'ron Giles
May 12th, 2005, 03:21 PM
I know we don't know any of these kinds of people.



>1) You lie on an application to get a job and then get up and testify

>that "God made a way out of no way!"

>

>2) You get mad at a visitor and call them out for sitting in YOUR seat.

>

>3) You tell the preacher to baptize you from the neck down because you

>just got your hair did!

>

>4) You take 2 hours to get ready for church, get there late, and leave

>early!!

>

>5) You open your Bible and you cough from the dust that flies out.

>

>6) Your wedding song is 'Secret Lovers'.

>

>7) You do not lift your hand during worship because your acrylic nail is

>broken.

>

>8) The only time you like to sing in the choir is when they let you

>sing "your" song.

>

>9) You do not tithe because you say, "the preacher might be crooked and

>stealing the Lord's money, s! o I don't want to give it to him."

>

>10) After you've done wrong and someone has rebuked you, you don't

>repent but you say, "Well the Lord knows my heart".

>

>11) If you have ever said, "Show me in the Bible where it says, thou

>shall not smoke".

>

>12) Your favorite part of the service is the benediction.

>

>13) You buy "hot" merchandise and testify the Lord blessed me with a TV,

>jewelry, clothes, etc.

>

>14) You overheard someone say, "We got fed today at service" and you

>asked if they served chicken.

>

>15) You just got finished smoking on the outside of the church and then

>try to lead a song, get choked up, holding your throat and say to the

>congregation, "The devil don't want me to sing this song."

>

>

>Pass this on to let others know the signs of a "ghetto" Christian.



Keep The Faith, and

The Faith will K! eep you

SelesFan70
May 12th, 2005, 03:35 PM
:lol: Those apply outside the ghetto, too!

Kelly
Jun 10th, 2005, 02:25 PM
not been to church for years....im so ashamed

Cariaoke
Jun 10th, 2005, 04:05 PM
I haven't been to church since I was a young child but I laughed at these because I've witnessed a few of them, most notably #10! That's happened so many times! :lol:

DemWilliamsGulls
Jun 10th, 2005, 04:13 PM
#3 funny as hell...I'm guilty of #4 and #9....my old preacher a crooked SOB....I woulnd't give a foodstamp in his service.

Kelly
Jun 10th, 2005, 04:19 PM
number 15 made me laugh just reminded me about my grandmar who according to her 'tried to avoid the devil and vampires as they are not nice people'

number 8 is kinda appropriate...i only sing the songs i like. not good enough to lead

controlfreak
Jun 10th, 2005, 04:45 PM
Some of these are funny... some are probably true for a lot of people... some are too obscure to register with my religion-free upbringing.

Thanks for posting anyway!

alexusjonesfan
Jun 10th, 2005, 05:43 PM
If it helps to know, it's common across all religions. Some Hindus take offerings to the temple and leave them for the gods. Well some of our family get their cooks to make lots of food while they're fixing their makeup so that when they arrive at the temple, they're the ones looking the best and with the biggest offering

Szymanowski
Jun 10th, 2005, 06:40 PM
Some of those, when true, can actually be really sad. I mean I know some people who lead pretty false and pathetic lives, and pretend to be worshippers, because it looks good. They may or may not believe. But I'm not sure they even know. They just can't really be bothered. It's sad.

rightous
Jun 10th, 2005, 06:48 PM
Some of those were hilarious, but as Dave commented there is nothing worst than someone who pretends to be something they are not

CooCooCachoo
Jun 10th, 2005, 06:52 PM
Well, I think at least one of these, in some way, applies to every Christian, or in fact every religious person out there, in whatever way.

I am glad to be an atheist and I believe there are many hypocritical sides to religions. I respect everyone's choices and beliefs, as long as they are not going against my principles, but there are many good weather believes out there as we call them in The Netherlands. This means that they are religious when it comes to the positive sides of having a religion (this is about the superficial sides only, i.e. days off and certain holidays), but then show now signs of believing at other times (e.g. Muslims that smoke and drink).

So as funny and witty as this list may seem, there is a lot of truth in it.

Cariaoke
Jun 10th, 2005, 07:46 PM
Regarding religion, I think there's a fine line between thinking for yourself and letting someone else think for you. I believe religion is a guideline on how people should lead their lives and with each guideline, the individual must choose to adhere to it or make a decision to think for his or herself. I don't have a problem with religion, itself, but rather people who think that believing in one makes them better than a person who doesn't and the hypocritical nature that follows such thought.

Dana Marcy
Jun 10th, 2005, 09:35 PM
:lol: Those apply outside the ghetto, too!

They surely do. It's not a socio-economic thing. It's a human thing. The list is funny, by the way.

Dana Marcy
Jun 10th, 2005, 09:37 PM
#3 funny as hell...I'm guilty of #4 and #9....my old preacher a crooked SOB....I woulnd't give a foodstamp in his service.

Foodstamps to church is hilarious. The thing that makes it even funnier is that I'm sure people actually do it (with the best of intentions, they're just a little short on cash that Sunday).

Dana Marcy
Jun 10th, 2005, 09:40 PM
Some of those, when true, can actually be really sad. I mean I know some people who lead pretty false and pathetic lives, and pretend to be worshippers, because it looks good. They may or may not believe. But I'm not sure they even know. They just can't really be bothered. It's sad.

It is sad because these people you're referring to are good at heart but they are trapped by guilt. If they could accept that they are human and that they will be forgiven then religion wouldn't be such a handcuffing issue. I also think that people shouldn't go to church because "they have to". That's another problem also.

controlfreak
Jun 10th, 2005, 11:56 PM
Just a personal comment about Christians: while I would never go near any religion with a bargepole, and will never be able to take any of their spiritual beliefs seriously, I have to say that several of the nicest people I have ever met have been devout Christians.

If you cut out all the stuff about God, Jesus, Heaven & Hell and all that, Christianity seems to be based on a fundamental set of morals which mostly correspond with the basic morals I was taught as a youngster. Maybe that's why I have got on well with Christians in the past. Then again, I have never asked any of my Christian friends about their views on homosexuality, so maybe we are not as "in tune" as I think... who knows...

ceiling_fan
Jun 11th, 2005, 12:31 AM
That is like the Christians i know that screw around and have sex because they know God will 'save them' afterwards and forgive them and also like those who are meant to be Christian but swear and are violent in songs/lyrics.

Anyway that was funny!

Andy Mac
Jun 11th, 2005, 12:32 AM
Some of those, when true, can actually be really sad. I mean I know some people who lead pretty false and pathetic lives, and pretend to be worshippers, because it looks good. They may or may not believe. But I'm not sure they even know. They just can't really be bothered. It's sad.
with ya there mate

CooCooCachoo
Jun 11th, 2005, 05:14 AM
Just a personal comment about Christians: while I would never go near any religion with a bargepole, and will never be able to take any of their spiritual beliefs seriously, I have to say that several of the nicest people I have ever met have been devout Christians.

If you cut out all the stuff about God, Jesus, Heaven & Hell and all that, Christianity seems to be based on a fundamental set of morals which mostly correspond with the basic morals I was taught as a youngster. Maybe that's why I have got on well with Christians in the past. Then again, I have never asked any of my Christian friends about their views on homosexuality, so maybe we are not as "in tune" as I think... who knows...

Of course there are many types of Christians. There are strict Christians, open-minded Christian, heck even gay Christians. I agree that some of them are very nice people, but other people are just narrow-minded.

In that sense, Christians don't really differ from the average human being.

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 10:03 AM
CooCoo exactly every group is representive of the entire human race, there are hyprocrites, open-minded people in every group. I think alot of people get a little frustated with Christians is that not every group puts forward a view of being self-righteous.

Also I once met Mother Teresa, a few years before she died and I have never been in awe of another human being in my life, she had such faith, such determination and such love it should be an example to us all, she should be talked about instead of so-called celebrities

Kelly
Jun 11th, 2005, 10:29 AM
thats very true rightous....but unfortionatly 'good' people dont get written about these days. which is a shame. i think religion is very contradictory...they say one thing...do the opposite. like the new pope saying that condoms should not be used to help aids/hiv in africa but they should abstain...i know its the catholic way not to have sex b4 mariage but to say contraception is wrong is not the way to tackle the issue.

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 10:35 AM
I think the Catholic church has alot to answer for especially in relation to the spread of AIDS in Africa. I think it is completely irresponsible for the Church's stance on this issue, they should be tackling the problem not adding to it

Lord Nelson
Jun 11th, 2005, 02:12 PM
I think the Catholic church has alot to answer for especially in relation to the spread of AIDS in Africa. I think it is completely irresponsible for the Church's stance on this issue, they should be tackling the problem not adding to it
hey, Africa has only 30% of its population that are Catholics. Africans are also Muslim, other Christian denominations or animists. India and China also have one of the highest number of people who have aids. Are you going to blame the Catholic Church for that too? India is mostly Hindu and China is officially atheist. Latin America and Europe where a lot of the nations are Catholics don't suffer as much from AIDS as in Africa. It is a cultural issue. The Anglican Church in England is pretty liberal unlike in Africa which remains quite conservative. In other words if the Catholic church becomes less conservative in Rome, this won't have an impact in CAtholic church in Africa. Last but not least, Africa suffers from many other diseases which should be as imoprtantly taken care of as AIDS.

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 02:40 PM
Lord Nelson while I respect your views perhaps you could also show other people a little of the same respect. In relation to what you are saying while I am not saying that Africa does not have a cultural mix, the catholic church has not helped in preventing the spread of AIDS. In fact my couisin who was a catholic missionary (in areas where there were not African Catholics) was told by the catholic church to tell people not to use condoms as there were holes in him and that it was a sin. The other balance is that the catholic church as done some brilliant work in Africa but its conservative views are not entirely helpful. I very much hope you respond to this is a respectful and non-aggressive fashion

Also AIDS is a major issue but as you said others are important, for instance river blindness and Concern for instance has tried to help reduce the number of people infected by this horrible disease

Lord Nelson
Jun 11th, 2005, 02:51 PM
ok, sorry there. But It is less the Catholic Church that impedes progress against AIDS. It is primarily a Cultural thing. Go to South America and you will see that the authorities are dealing better with AIDS than in Africa.

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 02:59 PM
Nelson very true and your point is a valid one. National government's have a vital role in educating individuals and providing healthcare support, and in Latin America (which I have been to) there is a more obvioua attempt to do this than in alot of African countries I think it would be aided greatly by the support of religious institutions such as the Catholic Church, or tribe leaders in the case of Africa.

alexusjonesfan
Jun 11th, 2005, 02:59 PM
ok, sorry there. But It is less the Catholic Church that impedes progress against AIDS. It is primarily a Cultural thing.

I'd have to disagree. The idea of contraception being taboo isn't indigenous to the parts of Africa where AIDS is spreading fastest. It's an idea brought about by the missionaries who've remodeled these cultures on their own beliefs. Yes I know the argument is that if these people are pious enough to not use condoms, why do then break other rules and have sex outside marriage. But of course it's about selective belief in what's convenient and what's not. AIDS has only been around for 30 years at the most so it can't have been something that's in the 'culture' of any of these populations. They only way they saw how to deal with it was that which was taught to them: i.e. HIV+ women are unclean and impure among other things.

Lord Nelson
Jun 11th, 2005, 03:09 PM
I have Indian heritage as you do. There, use of condoms is not a common thing. India as you know is mostly Hindu, (I'm Catholic). In Latin America and Europe, use of condoms is much more than in India and China which is really suffering from AIDS but where the authorities tend to hush it up.

alexusjonesfan
Jun 11th, 2005, 03:18 PM
I have Indian heritage as you do. There, use of condoms is not a common thing. India as you know is mostly Hindu, (I'm Catholic). In Latin America and Europe, use of condoms is much more than in India and China which is really suffering from AIDS but where the authorities tend to hush it up.

I agree with your point, other religions are just as conservative in matters of contraception. I think what most people here are upset about is the advocacy of the Catholic church against condoms when they've been shown to reduce the risk of catching HIV. Most people in this thread have more experience (I'd imagine) with the Catholic church than any other religion so you can see why that's being brought up more.

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 03:22 PM
I agree with your point, other religions are just as conservative in matters of contraception. I think what most people here are upset about is the advocacy of the Catholic church against condoms when they've been shown to reduce the risk of catching HIV. Most people in this thread have more experience (I'd imagine) with the Catholic church than any other religion so you can see why that's being brought up more.

exactly viggen most members probably have more personal ecperience of Christianity than other religions.

Lord Nelson
Jun 11th, 2005, 03:24 PM
Ok you have a point, thanks for your feedback.

harloo
Jun 11th, 2005, 04:09 PM
Wow, this thread was supposed to be funny. It seems most posters turned it into an anti-christian thing. Most Christians don't think they are better than anyone else, and certainly they should not be expected to be perfect. They are human like anyone else, and the bible says judge ye not. :angel:

Peace:D

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 04:11 PM
Harloo hey bro' its part of WNTP

Cariaoke
Jun 11th, 2005, 04:24 PM
I agree with your point, other religions are just as conservative in matters of contraception. I think what most people here are upset about is the advocacy of the Catholic church against condoms when they've been shown to reduce the risk of catching HIV. Most people in this thread have more experience (I'd imagine) with the Catholic church than any other religion so you can see why that's being brought up more.
Precisely.

Regardless of how conservative the religion is, the leaders of said religion have to face reality that some of their followers will sin and have sex before marriage. It's irresponsible to say condoms and other contraception is against God.

harloo
Jun 11th, 2005, 05:16 PM
Harloo hey bro' its part of WNTP

What up rightous! What is WNTP?;)

rightous
Jun 11th, 2005, 05:23 PM
Hey Bro how is your weekend going, any partying this weekend??

WNTP = WTAworld's Next Top Poster, obviously I am going to be the winner, although there is tough competition from, rokkstar, control freak, viggen, kelly, Dana, Silas its tough bro

controlfreak
Jun 12th, 2005, 10:25 AM
Wow, this thread was supposed to be funny. It seems most posters turned it into an anti-christian thing. Most Christians don't think they are better than anyone else, and certainly they should not be expected to be perfect. They are human like anyone else, and the bible says judge ye not. :angel:

Yes, I suppose some of the traditional "rules" of christianity/catholicism are quite controversial in today's world. People overlook the fact that many Christians do not adhere strictly to all these rules and beliefs. The ones I have met are simply nice well-balanced people with sensible morals and some degree of belief in God. I think a more liberal stance is prevalent among younger Christians and it tends to be the older generations who get classed as "Bible-bashers" in some parts of the world.