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jameshazza
Feb 23rd, 2012, 04:37 AM
It seems that every match commentary is virtually identical...so what are 5 things you're guaranteed to hear from the commentators in your favourite player's matches.

SHARAPOVA:

1) "...since winning Wimbledon at 17"
2) "Highest earning sportswoman in the world"
3) continuous mention of serve and shoulder surgery
4) "...engaged to Sasha Vujacic"
5) "coached by Thomas Hogstedt since the beginning of 2011..."

Pops Maellard
Feb 23rd, 2012, 04:44 AM
Ana Ivanovic:

1. Has struggled since becoming #1 in the world.
2. Her toss is dodgy.
3. Her forehand rules.
(In Australia) 4. She's well-known here, girlfriend of our own Adam Scott.

Kəv.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 04:48 AM
Samantha Stosur

1. "After winning the US Open...."
2. "Great forehand.."
3. "Her backhand has been improving though"
4. "That kick on the serve.."
5. "...The struggle in AO."

Kəv.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 04:50 AM
Jarka

1. "She hits with a lot of power..."
2. "Her shoulders are down again."
3. "Shes trying to put less power on and everytime she does that...."
4. "Thats TJ Tisdale.."

Mikey.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 05:02 AM
Jelena Jankovic

1. Still hasn't won a slam.
2. Former #1.
3. One of the few players to be #1 without a slam.
4. One of the best (or was one of the best) defenders of the tour.
5. Lacks that one kill shot.

Kəv.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 05:12 AM
Shes not my fave, but this will be funny.

Caro Wozniacki

"Great Backhand"
"She moves around the court so well."
"She cannot create power unlike other players"
"Its like playing against a wall"
"Shes not even huffing"

So Disrespectful
Feb 23rd, 2012, 05:19 AM
Jelena Dokic:

1) Needs to get more spin on her second serve
2) Used to be ranked number 4 way back in 2002
3) Great striker of the ball
4) She's not going to stop going for her shots
5) No plan B

So Disrespectful
Feb 23rd, 2012, 05:21 AM
Daniela Hantuchova:

1) Her movement can be exploited
2) She has natural timing/rhythmic groundstrokes
3) Her favourite shot is her backhand down the line
4) Has won the grand slam in mixed doubles
5) She likes playing that dropshot

everythingtaboo
Feb 23rd, 2012, 05:25 AM
Sabine Lisicki:

1. Ankle injury in 2010.
2. Comeback at Wimbledon in 2011.
3. Weak second serve.
4. Success of women's tennis in Germany lately.
5. "A very emotional player..."

SwingVolley93
Feb 23rd, 2012, 06:10 AM
"lacks the power but her clever play makes up for it"
"little magician"
"reminds me a lot of Martina Hingis"
"Once again Radwanska anticipates so well"
"Incredible defense from Radwanska I don't know how she stays in these points"

I quoted Mary Jo Fernandez, Renee Stubbs and Jo Durie/Sam Smith :oh:
:cheer:

Mightymirza
Feb 23rd, 2012, 07:42 AM
Sania Mirza.

1) What a great forehand.
2) Serve has always been a problem for Mirza.
3) She is such a hot and cold player.
4) She has very good doubles skills.
5) Consistency has always been a problem for Mirza.
6) Also "she is such a natural ball striker off FH and can hit through the ball. you cant teach these things" (with a reference to JJ FH).
7) Frequent "there is that FH" followed by "oh dear! oh dear!!" within few minutes :spit:

Pops Maellard
Feb 23rd, 2012, 08:01 AM
"lacks the power but her clever play makes up for it"
"little magician"
"reminds me a lot of Martina Hingis"
"Once again Radwanska anticipates so well"
"Incredible defense from Radwanska I don't know how she stays in these points"

I quoted Mary Jo Fernandez, Renee Stubbs and Jo Durie/Sam Smith :oh:
:cheer:
You forgot "that second serve..."

TuxedoSlam
Feb 23rd, 2012, 08:45 AM
Kim

1) "amazing comeback after becoming a mother"
2) "can still do the splits blablablah natural athleticism"
3) "her daughter Jada"
4) "forehand can break down"
5) "was seen dancing in that Polish telecom commercial"

Petronius
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:10 AM
1) lefty
2) Wimbledon champion
3) hits big
4) extremely talented
5) still very inconsistent

DemiCrayanhan
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:19 AM
1) lefty
2) Wimbledon champion
3) hits big
4) extremely talented
5) still very inconsistent

ditto.
"that lefty serve out wide..."
"at least she waits until after the point is over to bark"
"she's on a roll....she's lost the plot"
"for a girl of such height she sure can get down for the volley"
"against maria at wimbledon....her run to wimbledon title...this one time at wimbledon"

Mike81
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:20 AM
Sabine Lisicki:

1. Ankle injury in 2010.
2. Comeback at Wimbledon in 2011.
3. Weak second serve.
4. Success of women's tennis in Germany lately.
5. "A very emotional player..."

This. As well as mention of her serve being one of the biggest in the game, even if she's been struggling with it in recent matches and they still mention her cramping against Zvonareva at FO 2011 :rolleyes:

Setsuna.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:24 AM
1) "former number 5"
2) "has been struggling with injures"
3) "brilliant/geart Backhand DTL"

Petronius
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:28 AM
ditto.
"that lefty serve out wide..."
"at least she waits until after the point is over to bark"
"she's on a roll....she's lost the plot"
"for a girl of such height she sure can get down for the volley"
"against maria at wimbledon....her run to wimbledon title...this one time at wimbledon"

Some others I've heard:

"Magnificent!"
"Wow!"
"Isn't she adorable?"

:cool:

hdfb
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:45 AM
Jelena Dokic

1. Won a bronze medal at the 2000 Olympics
2. Reached #4 as a 19 year old
3. Which country is she playing for now?
4. Another double fault
5. That 2nd serve was faster than her 1st serve!

BepaMaria
Feb 23rd, 2012, 10:03 AM
Vera Zvonareva:

"Phenomenal defense"
"She certainly has the potential to win slams or climb to #1 in the world"
"2 time slam finalist"
"Losing to Serena in that Wimbledon final..."
"She's a very emotional player"
"But it really depends on how you use those emotions, and recently she has been using those emotions positively to help her win matches"
"Great backhand"
"Has had her fair share of injuries"

The Witch-king
Feb 23rd, 2012, 10:27 AM
1. Haterade
2. haterade
3. Haterade
4. haterade
5. Haterade
and
6. haterade.

Mashabator
Feb 23rd, 2012, 12:44 PM
Dokic:
'former world number four'
'double fault'
'too many unforced errors'
'flat second serve'
'great shotmaking'

Miracle Worker
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:05 PM
Kim

1) "amazing comeback after becoming a mother"
2) "can still do the splits blablablah natural athleticism"
3) "her daughter Jada"
4) "forehand can break down"
5) "was seen dancing in that Polish telecom commercial"

It would be funny if any of well known expert say something like this :spit:

Radwanska:

"She can be #5 soon"
"She developed her serve"
"She dismisses all the mugs"

Sammo
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:08 PM
Daniela Hantuchova:

1) Her movement can be exploited
2) She has natural timing/rhythmic groundstrokes
3) Her favourite shot is her backhand down the line
4) Has won the grand slam in mixed doubles
5) She likes playing that dropshot

Pattaya City champion nowadays too :lol:

Sammo
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:09 PM
Jelena Dokic

1. Won a bronze medal at the 2000 Olympics
2. Reached #4 as a 19 year old
3. Which country is she playing for now?
4. Another double fault
5. That 2nd serve was faster than her 1st serve!

Hmmm... no she didn't, Seles defeated her in the bronze medal match :lol:

young_gunner913
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:10 PM
Queen Bethanie -

1. GOAT winners
2. The worst errors you've ever seen.
3. High Fashion
4. Choking
5. Me throwing myself out my bedroom window after she loses in 3 sets up, a break in the third.

Elwin.
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:49 PM
Krajicek

1. Former top30
2. Halfsister of Richard Krajicek
3. Wimbledon QF
4. Big service
5. Footwork

Mynarco
Feb 23rd, 2012, 01:57 PM
Kvitova :

1.Wimbledon victory against Sharapova in straight sets
2.6 tournaments victory including a slam and YEC
3.she is the one in control of the match, hitting winners all over the place
4.wide lefty serve to the ad court
5.Dismal 1r exit to Dulgheru last year

Azarenka :

1.Her slam run this year
2.Good return + Good BH
3.Improved a lot compared to her results in 2009-2010

longtin23
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:10 PM
Li Na
1. First Asian to win a grandslam
2. Last year French Open champion
3. Slump and played like shit in the second half of 2011
4. Great shots :oh:
5. Large number of endorsments

Mistress of Evil
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:19 PM
1. Grunting The Creator
2. Divine Siberian Siren
3. The Best Paid Bitch in the business
4. Camilla Belle
5. As a fragile, tender child slayed Renocka The Great on The Sacred Ground

JustPetko
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:22 PM
Every player on polish Eurosport:
1. She played with Radwanska.
2. She played with Radwanska.
3. She played with Radwanska.
4. She played with Radwanska.
5. She played with Radwanska.

miffedmax
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:32 PM
Vika:

1. Controversy over the grunt
2 Is she louder than Sharapova, or is Sharapova louder than her
3. Used to have problem with emotions but has kept them in check
4. improved fitness and footwork
5. recent run of results/#1

longtin23
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:35 PM
Peng
1. Moonball
2. Two-handed Forehand and Backhand is more powerful
3. But strange to hit when the ball is close to your body
4. Yes!!! She catch a dropshot
5. Nice net skills

Stonerpova
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:36 PM
Sharapova:
1. 3-time Grand Slam champion
2. On a comeback from shoulder surgery
3. Mentally so tough
4. Movement is a liability
5. Service yips (especially if Pam Shriver is courtside)

Ivanovic:
1. Ball toss
2. Huge forehand
3. Post-08 slump
4. Former #1
5. 2008 French Open champion

fouc
Feb 23rd, 2012, 02:52 PM
Kim

1) "amazing comeback after becoming a mother"
2) "can still do the splits blablablah natural athleticism"
3) "her daughter Jada"
4) "forehand can break down"
5) "was seen dancing in that Polish telecom commercial"

:sobbing: haven't seen it in a while, hope it's still on youtube

Ellen Dawson
Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:03 PM
"...Warrior mode..." :yawn:

hurricanejeanne
Feb 23rd, 2012, 11:57 PM
Queen Victoria:

1. The grunt.
2. Great return.
3. Used to be much moodier on court, calmed down a lot.
4. The epiphany talk with Grandmarenka.
5. Her current win streak/being number one WITH a slam.

eddyhanty
Feb 24th, 2012, 12:23 AM
Dani

1/ Former world number 5 back in 2003
2/ Won all mixed GS with 4 different partners, one of only 6 women to do so - therefore in very good company
3/ Mentally weak when close to the end of matches,(even now!),e.g usually mention of AO SF 60 20 up against AI
4/ In order to win against Daniela, you have to exploit her movement
5/ Her "long levers"

Spring Pools
Feb 24th, 2012, 12:30 AM
Dementieva:

Double Faults
Screaming at her mom
Backhand Crosscourt
Her serve KPH speeds being slow for MPH
Another choke...

Fantasy Hero
Feb 24th, 2012, 07:50 AM
Flavia Pennetta:

-"she's been the first italian women ever to break into top 10"
-"she got back stronger from Moya's cheating"
-"outstanding return with BH DTL on Stosur's serve"
-"oh she shouldn't have missed this"
-"she lost her greatest chance last here in USO QF" -italian commentators say this every match she played after :sobbing:

Battiv
Feb 24th, 2012, 08:01 AM
Dementieva:

Double Faults
Screaming at her mom
Backhand Crosscourt
Her serve KPH speeds being slow for MPH
Another choke...

Olympic gold medal
She never won a slam

Smitten
Feb 24th, 2012, 08:03 AM
Legend

1) a legend
2) world #1 for 207 weeks
3) the smartest player ever to play the game
4) very outspoken, catty, and bitchy
5) there's that cheeky grin

Singleniacki
Feb 24th, 2012, 08:05 AM
Marion...

1. An unorthodox player, hits both sides with 2 hands.
2. She is always bouncing, jumping or doing something, I wonder were she gets the energy from?
3. Tenacious, you can never count her out regardless of the score.
4. Her father Walter, has unorthodox training techniques.
5. She is deceptively fast, just seems to get there where you don't think she will.
6. At the age of 6, changed to 2 hands after watching the success of Monica Seles.
7. Wimbledon F, beat Justine Henin.

nevetssllim
Feb 24th, 2012, 08:21 AM
If Annabel Croft is commentating;

-She really tries to intimidate her opponent, doesn't she?
-Gosh - what an intimidating noise!
-She's wearing a really intimidating dress, isn't she?
-That was a really intimidating shot, wasn't it?
-Her opponent is so intimidated out there.

Big_Banana
Feb 24th, 2012, 08:28 AM
1) spent the last 8 months signing endorsements
2) poor hubby
3) always has highs&lows
4) she jokes about his (poor) hubby
5) she's very classy when she doesn't fuck things up

Chrissie-fan
Feb 24th, 2012, 09:09 AM
Belgian commentators....

"30-0, come on Kim!"
"Great shot from Kim. It landed right on the baseline, what precision!"
"Her opponent got lucky there. It was a wild shot but I think it just caught the baseline."
"Match point! Come on Kim!"

Chris Bradnam...

Before a Wozzy match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Masha match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Ana match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Serena match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Jelena match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"

Big_Banana
Feb 24th, 2012, 01:07 PM
I forgot italian commentators.

1)"if it wasn't for THAT ball called in in RG final"
2)"if it wasn't for THAT ball called in in RG final"
3)"if it wasn't for THAT ball called in in RG final"
4)"if it wasn't for THAT ball called in in RG final"
5)"if it wasn't for THAT ball called in in RG final"

fouc
Feb 24th, 2012, 01:31 PM
Dani

1/ Former world number 5 back in 2003
2/ Won all mixed GS with 4 different partners, one of only 6 women to do so - therefore in very good company
3/ Mentally weak when close to the end of matches,(even now!),e.g usually mention of AO SF 60 20 up against AI
4/ In order to win against Daniela, you have to exploit her movement
5/ Her "long levers"

lol no on says it

Craig.
Feb 24th, 2012, 02:35 PM
Belgian commentators....

"30-0, come on Kim!"
"Great shot from Kim. It landed right on the baseline, what precision!"
"Her opponent got lucky there. It was a wild shot but I think it just caught the baseline."
"Match point! Come on Kim!"

Chris Bradnam...

Before a Wozzy match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Masha match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Ana match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Serena match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"
Before a Jelena match: "Do you like the dress, Jo?"

OMG YES :bigcry:

MB.
Feb 24th, 2012, 03:36 PM
Jankovic:

1.) Sneki and her water sipping.
2.) Flair for the dramatic
3.) BH DTL
4.) Shitty serve and/or FH
5.) Former #1

BuTtErFrEnA
Feb 24th, 2012, 03:40 PM
If Annabel Croft is commentating;

-She really tries to intimidate her opponent, doesn't she?
-Gosh - what an intimidating noise!
-She's wearing a really intimidating dress, isn't she?
-That was a really intimidating shot, wasn't it?
-Her opponent is so intimidated out there.

oooo let me guess :lol:

NA-GOAT
Feb 24th, 2012, 03:57 PM
Na's Match

- she is a trailblazer
- she won RG despite sucking on clay
- when they show her husband, something about his snoring
- her slumps after deep runs in slams
- her endorsements

:facepalm:

Ellen Dawson
Feb 28th, 2012, 04:44 PM
Jankovic:

1.) Sneki and her water sipping.
2.) Flair for the dramatic
3.) BH DTL
4.) Shitty serve and/or FH
5.) Former #1

Jelly :hug: And you forgot her sliding. :p

Shuji Shuriken
Feb 28th, 2012, 05:10 PM
Legend

1) a legend
2) world #1 for 207 weeks
3) the smartest player ever to play the game
4) very outspoken, catty, and bitchy
5) there's that cheeky grin

Not so fast boo boo. You forgot cocaine http://img203.imageshack.us/img203/718/ngya84.gif