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View Full Version : Would you date a transsexual?


moby
Apr 4th, 2011, 02:55 AM
I'm most interested in answers by gay men. Would you guys date an FTM man?

Some explanation would be helpful.

LeRoy.
Apr 4th, 2011, 03:38 AM
What percent of FTM transexuals want to sleep with men ? Most of them are into women, right ?

moby
Apr 4th, 2011, 03:49 AM
What percent of FTM transexuals want to sleep with men ? Most of them are into women, right ?I don't know if "most" are into women, but I believe that there is a sizable percentage who are into men.
Just as there are many MTF transsexuals who identify as lesbian following their transition.

new-york
Apr 4th, 2011, 03:52 AM
I've seen some pictures of FTM and boy there were some handsome specimens.

I guess we'd need to work out some technical issues but why not.

I'd be curious about his personality. Knowing that he was previously a woman, i'd prolly notice or actually try to spot fem characteristics and stuff.

Has he still got mental boobs? :oh:

That's be interesting. Not sure how it would end up, but yes, i'd def give it a shot.

LeRoy.
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:23 AM
From wiki

The sexual orientation of trans men is usually expressed with respect to male identity. Therefore a trans man who prefers female partners is considered heterosexual (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heterosexual).[17] (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trans_man#cite_note-16) Some transpeople identify as heterosexual, some as homosexual or bisexual, and some refuse to use conventional sexual orientation labels to describe to whom they are attracted.[11] (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trans_man#cite_note-IJSO-10) One study suggests that prior to transition, female-to-male transsexuals tended to base their sexual orientation identities more on their gender identities and affectional preferences than on their sex identities, physical preferences, or sexual practices. After transition, female-to-male transsexuals who were sexually active were additionally able to make use of their gender identity role to base their sexual orientation identities on their sex identities. Forty percent of participants who were 10 or more years post-transition reported having been sexually attracted to gay men.[18] (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trans_man#cite_note-17)


Wow. That seems like a high percentage!

LeRoy.
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:29 AM
To answer the question, if the FTM looked like Bradley Cooper, yes, I would date them. And yes I am shallow. :D

Stamp Paid
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:33 AM
omg.
if im being honest, no. :lol:

Drake1980
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:38 AM
Honestly no but I would be friends with one for sure.

LeRoy.
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:41 AM
So lets say Mauresmo as a FTM transitions and starts looking like Feliciano Lopez or Tommy Haas, would you guys not date him ?

PatrickRyan
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:42 AM
no, I don't think I would.

Stamp Paid
Apr 4th, 2011, 04:43 AM
So lets say Mauresmo as a FTM transitions and starts looking like Feliciano Lopez or Tommy Haas, would you guys not date him ?What does a FTM post-op dick look like?
*googled it*
nah uh. :lol:

Smitten
Apr 4th, 2011, 05:26 AM
What does a FTM post-op dick look like?
*googled it*
nah uh. :lol:

I can't take.

stevos
Apr 4th, 2011, 06:57 AM
Well, there's this really REALLY sexy FTM guy I know who I would probably hook up with (as in I really want to). But this particular guy I don't think I'd want to be in a relationship with, just personality wise.
The sex part does scare me, to be honest. Just because I wouldn't know the particular insecurities/wishes of that person in their identification, or comfort in the way people want to be seen/touched especially when they are recently transitioned. A friend of mine dated an FTM guy and she said that at first she had difficulty feeling comfortable going down on him, but eventually their sex was great (which seems pretty typical of any relationship, to be honest).

So yeah, depending on the person, I probably would. The only other issue is I'm such a bottom. Hmmm. That is a tough one.

Miss Atomic Bomb
Apr 4th, 2011, 09:16 AM
If they feel like a guy (this is more important, since I am not attracted to guys only because of their physical features), look like a guy and have a big cock then why not?

I havent been attracted to the FTMs that I have come across so far.

Kart
Apr 4th, 2011, 09:35 PM
Yes. I can't see a reason why I wouldn't if I found them attractive.

You thinking about having an operation moby?

Moveyourfeet
Apr 4th, 2011, 09:37 PM
I would not. Reason: I like my men xy.

égalité
Apr 4th, 2011, 09:52 PM
What does a FTM post-op dick look like?
*googled it*
nah uh. :lol:

yeah that's the first thing I thought :tears:

not saying it's gross, it's just not for me :tape:

Darop.
Apr 5th, 2011, 12:49 AM
No less than I'd date any other man I'm attracted to.

I'd be a bit turned off if they have a really weird post-op penis :unsure: but no more than I'd be kind of turned off by any other type of weird penis. Plus, if I really like someone I tend not to care/notice what their penis is like, but that's just me.

delicatecutter
Apr 5th, 2011, 01:51 AM
I don't think modern medicine has been able to create a penis that works, or else men would be lining up by the millions.

moby
Apr 5th, 2011, 03:04 AM
Yes. I can't see a reason why I wouldn't if I found them attractive.

You thinking about having an operation moby?Being stuck in a female body is taking a toll on my emotional life, yes.

cellophane
Apr 5th, 2011, 03:05 AM
No, I wouldn't

Novichok
Apr 5th, 2011, 03:58 AM
If they feel like a guy (this is more important, since I am not attracted to guys only because of their physical features), look like a guy and have a big cock then why not?

I havent been attracted to the FTMs that I have come across so far.

I don't think there are any FTMs with big cocks. I'm not a size queen but I don't think I could be satisfied by what they're offering.

Kart
Apr 7th, 2011, 10:51 AM
Being stuck in a female body is taking a toll on my emotional life, yes.

Well now you know that I'd date you*, what are you waiting for?














* Pending prior provision of a detailed list of financial holdings.

moby
Apr 7th, 2011, 09:35 PM
Well now you know that I'd date you*, what are you waiting for?

* Pending prior provision of a detailed list of financial holdings.Kart, I'm too young to have money, but I believe with the right career choice, I have much potential.*


* I can take care of you in your dotage.

Certinfy
Apr 7th, 2011, 10:13 PM
Not gay, but no I wouldn't.

Helen Lawson
Apr 8th, 2011, 12:16 AM
I like rough looking guy-guys, not sure a FTM can capture what I'm after, most of the ones I meet look like tomboy/dykes, not my thing. I'm open to it conceptually, no problem, but practically, I'm not sure one exists. But the right personality to melt my heart, of course.

hablo
Apr 8th, 2011, 09:12 PM
Being stuck in a female body is taking a toll on my emotional life, yes.

hhmmm ... I always thought you were a guy?

Anyhow, what made you think of this question anyway?

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 24th, 2011, 02:28 AM
A few years ago I'd have said no, but honestly if I felt a connection to the person and I was sexually attracted to them, yes I would. But like, they'd have to be really convincing. Not that it's their job to convince me or anyone of anything, but I like men for a reason.

Watching series like QAF and The L Word legitimately opened my mind up about this kind of thing. Not to mention I've recently become good friends with a transgendered person and I admire her greatly. Anyone with courage like that deserves a chance in my eyes.

Sp!ffy
Nov 24th, 2011, 02:57 AM
Hmm, I always thought moby was a guy as well.

Honestly, I don't see myself dating one. I'm really attracted to extremely boyish, cocky, bratty guys--not saying that a trans can't be all that--but I only think a naturally born male could fulfill what I want. Actually, I think I'm only attracted to straight guys and it drives me insane.

moby
Nov 24th, 2011, 03:21 AM
^ I am a guy, and you will grow out of it.

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 24th, 2011, 03:29 AM
and you will grow out of it.
Yeah. Also, one's taste can and likely will change at least slightly over the course of their lifetime. There are things I found sexy once upon a time that are kind of a turn off to me now, and things that I used to not be into that I now have an appreciation for.

As for straight guys - I'll always have a bit of a soft spot for them. It's in my gay DNA. :sobbing:

Sp!ffy
Nov 24th, 2011, 03:39 AM
Hopefully I'll grow out of it. I'm nearly an adult now...:tears:

moby
Nov 24th, 2011, 04:25 AM
Hopefully I'll grow out of it. I'm nearly an adult now...:tears:Not a girl, not yet a woman. Still a gayby.

Sp!ffy
Nov 24th, 2011, 04:28 AM
:haha::haha::haha::haha:

Gayby.....:happy::happy:

shap_half
Nov 24th, 2011, 04:48 AM
As for straight guys - I'll always have a bit of a soft spot for them. It's in my gay DNA. :sobbing:

Isn't this the case for most gay men? The unattainable?

Dominic
Nov 24th, 2011, 04:50 AM
Honestly no but I would be friends with one for sure.

This

Dominic
Nov 24th, 2011, 04:54 AM
As for straight guys - I'll always have a bit of a soft spot for them. It's in my gay DNA. :sobbing:

OMG me too, as soon as a straight guy is hot and sweet, it's stronger than me, I always end up getting really close friends with him and getting a crush on him it's inevitable. And then try in vain to make him do gay stuff with me :oh: (not necessarely sexual), although alot of the times it ends up working :lol:

moby
Nov 24th, 2011, 05:16 AM
Isn't this the case for most gay men? The unattainable?It's the whole "wanting to be straight" transmuting to "wanting a straight" + heterosexist media and societal portrayal of attractive men. Ultimately gay men just want to be "one of the boys", right?, after a whole lifetime of being told they are not.

shap_half
Nov 24th, 2011, 05:23 AM
I know an FTM, and if he just stood there, I would never guess he weren't a biological male. But then some of his actions and affectations reveal that he used to be a woman.

Honestly, I don't think I can, but I've been attracted to some of the most random of people, some of whom I would never admit to being attracted to never mind having had relations with, so who knows?

shap_half
Nov 24th, 2011, 05:25 AM
It's the whole "wanting to be straight" transmuting to "wanting a straight" + heterosexist media and societal portrayal of attractive men. Ultimately gay men just want to be "one of the boys", right?, after a whole lifetime of being told they are not.

Maybe it's subconscious, because never in my adult, out life have I ever wanted to be straight.

Dominic
Nov 24th, 2011, 05:34 AM
It's the whole "wanting to be straight" transmuting to "wanting a straight" + heterosexist media and societal portrayal of attractive men. Ultimately gay men just want to be "one of the boys", right?, after a whole lifetime of being told they are not.

Hmm for me it's more about wanting every man to be gay :lol:

Apoleb
Nov 24th, 2011, 05:59 AM
TF in full gay mode. :cheer:

I used to be attracted to straight guys. Now they just bore me. :shrug:

LoveFifteen
Nov 24th, 2011, 06:29 AM
A FTM takes male hormones, which causes the clitoris to grow in size and develop a more prononced head. As you may know, the clitoris does get erect during arousal. So basically, a FTM can fuck you will his clitoris. If I were a top and the FTM were a bottom, I'd consider it. But since I like well-hung tops, I just don't think I could be satisfied by a "clenis". Or is it called a "penoris"?

Miss Atomic Bomb
Nov 24th, 2011, 09:16 AM
TF in full gay mode. :cheer:

I used to be attracted to straight guys. Now they just bore me. :shrug:

+1

The moment I realise a guy is straight, the attraction goes out of the window.

Sp!ffy
Nov 24th, 2011, 09:51 AM
How do you really know they're straight? They're just confused.

Fighterpova
Nov 24th, 2011, 10:54 AM
Hmm, I always thought moby was a guy as well.

Honestly, I don't see myself dating one. I'm really attracted to extremely boyish, cocky, bratty guys--not saying that a trans can't be all that--but I only think a naturally born male could fulfill what I want. Actually, I think I'm only attracted to straight guys and it drives me insane.

Ugh, me too :( :lol:
I actually agree with everything you said.

Fighterpova
Nov 24th, 2011, 11:04 AM
I could only date real men with real dicks :lol:

McPie
Nov 24th, 2011, 11:18 AM
date dunno :shrug:

talk okay :p

Novichok
Nov 24th, 2011, 01:17 PM
TF in full gay mode. :cheer:

I used to be attracted to straight guys. Now they just bore me. :shrug:

This.

I have no desire now to be with a straight guy.

Sammo
Nov 24th, 2011, 01:49 PM
Holy shit no :spit:

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 24th, 2011, 06:15 PM
I used to be attracted to straight guys. Now they just bore me. :shrug:
The moment I realise a guy is straight, the attraction goes out of the window.
Show me the way. :sobbing: LOL

Miss Atomic Bomb
Nov 24th, 2011, 06:56 PM
Show me the way. :sobbing: LOL

I just imagine if they would be able to rock the splooge-on-face look as well as the gay boys, and the answer is usually NO!

But in all seriousness, I think its got to do something with being sexually attracted to a person who is sexually attracted to me. I have been with 'straight guys', and most of the time it was a use and abuse (not the bad kind) kind of scenario. Kind of over it now.

Dominic
Nov 24th, 2011, 07:12 PM
Show me the way. :sobbing: LOL

Or you could just turn them gay :cheer:

shap_half
Nov 24th, 2011, 09:15 PM
I just imagine if they would be able to rock the splooge-on-face look as well as the gay boys, and the answer is usually NO!

:lol: What??

mykarma
Nov 24th, 2011, 11:46 PM
I just imagine if they would be able to rock the splooge-on-face look as well as the gay boys, and the answer is usually NO!

But in all seriousness, I think its got to do something with being sexually attracted to a person who is sexually attracted to me. I have been with 'straight guys', and most of the time it was a use and abuse (not the bad kind) kind of scenario. Kind of over it now.
Just checking but doesn't that either make them bi-sexual or a liar?

Onjanae.
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:16 AM
I find this such an odd question (in a slightly interesting way). I hope the OP won't mind my contributions if they are way off base, but maybe someone struggling with transsexual life may take some positives from this.

Before I get into this I have to ask if the inspiration for the thread is an enhanced understanding of the nature of attraction or something more personal (someone did ask, but received no answer).

Anyway, asking gay IDENTIFIED men if they would date a transman is like asking a vegetarian if they would drink a solution of purified inorganic minerals obtained from animal/human flesh. Instinctively we can guess the answer would be - no, why would I have that when I can have the real deal (natural stuff). Analogies aren't perfect but I think most respondents in the thread said No, which is really to be expected.

Overlooking the possibility that you asked the question purely out of curiosity about gay preferences, what gets in the way of a really satisfying discussion about attraction etc, is that gay identified men/women are not the niche market for transsexuals. Bisexuals are (broadly speaking).

Now here is where I over step my bounds. Darling if you are Trans and you're struggling with locating an environment that has people that will find you desirable (including all that you have become or plan to) - they are out there in large numbers. Unfortunately hetrosexist society bands LGBT all as one and so many believe gay establishments cater for all, but that's not accurate. Take for example the "Ballroom scene" in the US. There are videos on Youtube showing an environment with many many men that seem hetro (and may even identify as so publically) often lusting over trans female performers.

To round this up, it dawned on me a while back that bisexuality isn't well understood. We often think of bisexuals as those who like either men or women, but some like male and female features at once. Boobs and dick or Pecs and Vagina broadly speaking.

As I said earlier I could be totally off base but if this is personal to you, just know that there is more than one person at least who will adore you as you are in mind and body. For heavens sake if Pete burns can get a man, why can't anyone.

Ps. in case you are wondering I am NOT a transsexual myself. Just learned some stuff along the way. If this info is meaningless to you, someone else might find it of interest. I just hope I am not made to regret putting in this effort. :D

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:19 AM
I just imagine if they would be able to rock the splooge-on-face look as well as the gay boys, and the answer is usually NO!
:sobbing:

But in all seriousness, I think its got to do something with being sexually attracted to a person who is sexually attracted to me. I have been with 'straight guys', and most of the time it was a use and abuse (not the bad kind) kind of scenario. Kind of over it now.
Yeah, I know what you mean. I've done 'it' before too (not full on sex, just fooled around) but as mykarma implied, it kind of puts everything into question once you actually get there. :lol: I think for me it's not so much an attraction to straight guys as much as it is an attraction to men who possess what would stereotypically be considered 'straight' personality and physical traits, and despite the fact that people tell me all the time that men like this exist everywhere within the gay community, I very rarely seem to meet or come across them. :lol: But like, I love it when I can't tell what their sexual preference is based on their voice or physical mannerisms, terrible as that sounds. Nothing at all against effeminate gays, it's just a matter of sexual attraction.

Honestly though, and to touch on something that was brought up earlier, tastes definitely do change, or at least, they broaden with experience and coming to terms with one's self. The guy I'm seeing now doesn't really fit the description I just mentioned at all, and I've never been more attracted to someone on any level, physically or otherwise. Which is why I definitely think a relationship with a transgendered person would be a possibility for me if the circumstances were right. Luckily I'm versatile so I wouldn't have to rely solely on getting clit-fucked. :sobbing:

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:22 AM
I find this such an odd question (in a slightly interesting way). I hope the OP won't mind my contributions if they are way off base, but maybe someone struggling with transsexual life may take some positives from this.

Before I get into this I have to ask if the inspiration for the thread is an enhanced understanding of the nature of attraction or something more personal (someone did ask, but received no answer).

Anyway, asking gay IDENTIFIED men if they would date a transman is like asking a vegetarian if they would drink a solution of purified inorganic minerals obtained from animal/human flesh. Instinctively we can guess the answer would be - no, why would I have that when I can have the real deal (natural stuff). Analogies aren't perfect but I think most respondents in the thread said No, which is really to be expected.

Overlooking the possibility that you asked the question purely out of curiosity about gay preferences, what gets in the way of a really satisfying discussion about attraction etc, is that gay identified men/women are not the niche market for transsexuals. Bisexuals are (broadly speaking).

Now here is where I over step my bounds. Darling if you are Trans and you're struggling with locating an environment that has people that will find you desirable (including all that you have become or plan to) - they are out there in large numbers. Unfortunately hetrosexist society bands LGBT all as one and so many believe gay establishments cater for all, but that's not accurate. Take for example the "Ballroom scene" in the US. There are videos on Youtube showing an environment with many many men that seem hetro (and may even identify as so publically) often lusting over trans female performers.

To round this up, it dawned on me a while back that bisexuality isn't well understood. We often think of bisexuals as those who like either men or women, but some like male and female features at once. Boobs and dick or Pecs and Vagina broadly speaking.

As I said earlier I could be totally off base but if this is personal to you, just know that there is more than one person at least who will adore you as you are in mind and body. For heavens sake if Pete burns can get a man, why can't anyone.

Ps. in case you are wondering I am NOT a transsexual myself. Just learned some stuff along the way. If this info is meaningless to you, someone else might find it of interest. I just hope I am not made to regret putting in this effort. :D
:worship: T4P.

Onjanae.
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:24 AM
It's the whole "wanting to be straight" transmuting to "wanting a straight" + heterosexist media and societal portrayal of attractive men. Ultimately gay men just want to be "one of the boys", right?, after a whole lifetime of being told they are not.

Also, I think you are way off here. There are as many motivations as there are people, or at least a number of patterns/reasons. Certainly not one reason alone, however general.

For instance, I think attraction isn't along one dimension. Some people focus on visual appeal, some on feel. For some it's predominantly psychological (relationship dynamics).

Or maybe I've just become allergic to simple answers :lol:

Onjanae.
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:26 AM
:worship: T4P.

:hearts: You are so kind. I had second thoughts about posting but I feel better now :D

WhatTheDeuce
Nov 25th, 2011, 12:49 AM
:hearts: You are so kind. I had second thoughts about posting but I feel better now :D
I'm glad you posted it, it's a really interesting POV and not something I would have thought of myself when contemplating this topic. :)

For instance, I think attraction isn't along one dimension. Some people focus on visual appeal, some on feel. For some it's predominantly psychological (relationship dynamics).
Another great point. I've developed attraction to people who I wasn't initially attracted to at all. After getting to know them on a deeper level, it kind of changed everything. Physicality becomes a non-dominant factor in cases like this.

One of my best friends is dating a guy nearly twice her age, and he's kinda got this stereotypical old-mannish way about him, especially physically. Like, he really looks his age, put it that way. If I passed him in the street I probably wouldn't look once, let alone twice. After I met him the first time briefly, I couldn't see what she saw in him, and frankly the idea of sexual contact with him was revolting. But after I sat down with him during a social gathering and actually got to know him, something changed, I was all of a sudden really curious and fascinated by him. Maybe it was the fact that we discussed him being well-hung, or maybe the fact that despite his age and the generation he's from, he still had very modern & open-minded views on gay rights and issues. But it was a complete 180.

I think some people who are answering no to this question aren't taking into account the fact that attraction can be developed, and it can stem from non-physical traits in some circumstances.

shap_half
Nov 25th, 2011, 05:22 AM
Luckily I'm versatile so I wouldn't have to rely solely on getting clit-fucked. :sobbing:

:lol:

I love TF when I need a break from work.




Another great point. I've developed attraction to people who I wasn't initially attracted to at all. After getting to know them on a deeper level, it kind of changed everything. Physicality becomes a non-dominant factor in cases like this.

One of my best friends is dating a guy nearly twice her age, and he's kinda got this stereotypical old-mannish way about him, especially physically. Like, he really looks his age, put it that way. If I passed him in the street I probably wouldn't look once, let alone twice. After I met him the first time briefly, I couldn't see what she saw in him, and frankly the idea of sexual contact with him was revolting. But after I sat down with him during a social gathering and actually got to know him, something changed, I was all of a sudden really curious and fascinated by him. Maybe it was the fact that we discussed him being well-hung, or maybe the fact that despite his age and the generation he's from, he still had very modern & open-minded views on gay rights and issues. But it was a complete 180.

I think some people who are answering no to this question aren't taking into account the fact that attraction can be developed, and it can stem from non-physical traits in some circumstances.

I've met guys who I was at first really not attracted to and after getting to know them developed what I thought was an attraction but after really thinking about it was just unresolved residue from having developed a liking for them. That's one of the things I used to struggle with when I meet guys in a situations that could potentially lead to intimacy. I was often gauging everything for that purpose only to the point where I completely loose track of everything.

It's like, "Oh gosh this David sure is ugly and doesn't have table manners; I can't wait for my friend to come back with drinks." Then 10 minutes later after he and I have spoken about the fact that we have the same taste in books, and I've felt up what seems to be really solid arms, I'm thinking, "Oh gosh this David needs to drag me to the bathroom immediately!" But after spending more time with this kid, I realize that there was nothing there.

Dominic
Nov 25th, 2011, 03:37 PM
I think some people who are answering no to this question aren't taking into account the fact that attraction can be developed, and it can stem from non-physical traits in some circumstances.

Sure, I know what you mean, but IMO there has to be at least a tiny bit of physical attraction in the first place for there to be potential to grow even more. For example, some of my friends, I find dog ugly :tape: and when our relationships developped, I really discovered alot to be admired about them but there is no way any sexual attraction could appear there unless their looks improve.

On the other hand, at the gym where I work, a couple months ago I came across this client, every now and then, I didn't think much of him, just said hi.. I thought he had nice arms, cute face but nothing more, and now that he's been working at the gym for a couple months and we have gotten very close, I can pretty safely say that I have this giant crush on him :hearts: and now see him as almost perfect physically... And he's one of the fucking straight guys I was :o talking about

Miss Atomic Bomb
Nov 25th, 2011, 05:44 PM
:lol: What??

you know it girl!

Just checking but doesn't that either make them bi-sexual or a liar?

Not necessarily, I have slept with a couple of girls and I am gay.

sammy01
Nov 25th, 2011, 05:54 PM
being a top it is probably easier to say yes and that i would sleep with them/date them, as most people look ok from behind lol.

melodynelson
Nov 25th, 2011, 07:10 PM
you know it girl!



Not necessarily, I have slept with a couple of girls and I am gay.

That's one of the things I never understood...how can people who are gay have sex with people of the opposite sex and vice versa? I know sexuality is fluid, but if you consider yourself gay and "only" gay how does this happen?

To answer the thread question, I doubt it.