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Shafanovic.
Jun 14th, 2009, 12:35 AM
Today I told my family that I don't want to go to uni after high school, that I want to go to Tafe for cooking.

Everyone was fine with it. Except my grandma who started crying.

The view in my family is that if you don't go to uni, you're fucking dumb. Well then in that case I'm a fucking idiot.

WHY DOESN'T SHE JUST LET ME FUCKING LIVE MY FUCKING LIFE!? IF I WANT TO FUCKING JUMP IN FRONT OF A TRUCK OR JUMP OFF A FUCKING CLIFF, THEN FUCKING LET ME!!!

In The Zone
Jun 14th, 2009, 12:39 AM
People have expectations, whether they be valid or not. You only gave your family a few minutes to get used to this new idea, albeit it was your decision all along.

Try not to judge people's reactions today but wait to see how they feel in a few months -- that will show how they truly feel. Either way, feel comfortable knowing that you made the right decision for yourself.

drake3781
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:00 AM
Chances of having a higher standard of living after attending college are much better than tech school. Your grandma wants the best for you.

Talk to her, let her know that you know she cares a lot, and you understand her reaction. Make sure she knows you intend to FINISH. And talk about what plans you have after graduation. There are many ways to use your cooking school education. Let her know what you will do with it.

And your reaction is really childish. She is letting you live your life. You are overreacting. Ask yourself why... that may help to resolve everything.

Lin Lin
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:05 AM
Oh no,probably you are still too young athough you think you are an adult:hug:They definitely love you so much,they just tell you something that they have in their life experience,which apparetly you lack of I think.:)

And,if you think you life is only about youself,I don't agree with you.Blood is thicker than water.You are all connected.:)

And I doubt a decision made by oneself is always a right decision.For a 18-something years old boy or girl,they generally don't make a right decison when they look back 5 or 10 years later.

My suggestion is:you can now participate in works for one or two years then make a decision whether you need to go to university or not.:)But I am not sure if you want to go to university 1 year later, whether you will have the opportunity:(.

Sean.
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:20 AM
You just said they were fine with it (apart from your Grandma) but then also said they wont let you live you life the way you want. At the end of the day it could have been a lot worse, the majority of your family is supporting you in what you want to do and you should be greatful for that. Grandparents tend to be the most stubborn because things were different in 'their day' but I doubt she will actively try to stop you doing what you want to do :shrug:

Cat's Pajamas
Jun 14th, 2009, 02:15 AM
I'm sure your emotions are high right now, let things cool down and go from there. But remember, you only have one life, live it for yourself.

eck
Jun 14th, 2009, 03:10 AM
It's sad that your grandmother doesn't see it the way you do, but hey, you can't please them all. But I reckon she'll come around and be supportive.
I told my sister that I wanted to go to TAFE, but my sister said that if I told my dad he'd have a fit.
I don't think not going to uni doesn't mean your dumb, it just means you chose to do something else rather than what majority might have done.

Good luck in TAFE. Cook some good stuff, and maybe you can be on MasterChef or those shows ;)

RenaSlam.
Jun 14th, 2009, 03:16 AM
Just live your life. EYEYEYEYEYEY.

Elske
Jun 14th, 2009, 03:24 AM
Don't be such a drama queen, the others are fine with it. She'll learn to live with it.

Sally Struthers
Jun 14th, 2009, 03:25 AM
who cares what your grandmother has to say? She's not hte one raising you and paying the bills is she? Cooking is a fine profession. Some people just are not cut out for school. Better to know what you want to do now and pursue it while you are young than try to please others and wait.

Ciarán
Jun 14th, 2009, 03:55 AM
My dad is such a pusher. So I do everything in my power to fuck him off :bigwave:

Harvs
Jun 14th, 2009, 07:11 AM
lol... i think your making this out to be bigger than it is. although i am saying that after reading a 200 word summary.

SM
Jun 14th, 2009, 07:15 AM
just do what makes YOU happy, its that simple. you dont want to be working in a job you HATE for 40 years, do you?

you should only go to uni if its a prerequisite for a certain job or field of work you want to get in to, and never just go for the sake of going or for your grandmother.

Serenita
Jun 14th, 2009, 07:56 AM
she loves you.

-Ph51-
Jun 14th, 2009, 08:17 AM
Okay Gordon! :tape::devil:

Slutiana
Jun 14th, 2009, 08:54 AM
That makes you a failure? :tape:

FORZA SARITA
Jun 14th, 2009, 09:02 AM
That makes you a failure? :tape:

indeed :spit:
i was quite in a same position last year but i didn't care of my parent's opinion because life is mine and nobody have the right to take decisions for me....you have a brain,use it :wavey:

ce
Jun 14th, 2009, 12:00 PM
its your life,your decisions :)

Direwolf
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:20 PM
Gosh
get a life you selfish idiot!!
think about others before yourself

if you want to get your own fucking life
get out of the house
and live independently

what a disgrace to your family

Kart
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:28 PM
At some point in life, you'll have to form and be comfortable with your own views, not those of your family.

Now would be a good time to start reconciling.

Though it's worth saying that your grandmother's emotional blackmail is probably coming from a place of love so don't be too hard on her. Older people have lived through, observed and made their own share of mistakes so it's understandable if they try to guide you with the benefit of their experience - even if it's not always relevant.

Renalicious
Jun 14th, 2009, 01:40 PM
Chris, I think this is the wrong place to start a thread like this...you're gonna get some opinions that will offend you and that make you even more pissed.

Anywho, if you insist on posting...like a lot of people have said here...your Grandma is only one person and if you focus on the positives - you'll see that everybody else thought it was okay. Would you rather everyone think it was not okay, and your Grandma thinking the only one it was okay? This is not a bad situation - your family is behind you, albeit apart from your G. Mother but that's okay, she'll come around! Hope things cool off. :)

woosey
Jun 14th, 2009, 02:07 PM
Today I told my family that I don't want to go to uni after high school, that I want to go to Tafe for cooking.

Everyone was fine with it. Except my grandma who started crying.

The view in my family is that if you don't go to uni, you're fucking dumb. Well then in that case I'm a fucking idiot.

WHY DOESN'T SHE JUST LET ME FUCKING LIVE MY FUCKING LIFE!? IF I WANT TO FUCKING JUMP IN FRONT OF A TRUCK OR JUMP OFF A FUCKING CLIFF, THEN FUCKING LET ME!!!

i just wanna give you a bit of a different perspective.

i don't have a problem with cooking school. i'm a bit of a food obsessed person and i've known people who have gone to cooking school. but, they also got their bachelor's degree - undergrad degree - don't know what you guys call it and went to cooking school after they worked a bit.

i'm someone who really believes in getting an education and believe if you can go to college you should. i would encourage you to think of the bigger picture in a way.

i'm looking at this economy right now. one of the main areas affected are the service industries. restaurants are struggling. in fact, i went to a place last night and the kitchen closed a couple hours early because there weren't that many people there. this industry in particular depends on people having discretionary income to spend. so when the economy is down, these places will be the first hit and among the first with layoffs.

although there are no guarantees, having an undergraduate degree might really help you make a decent living and give you more flexibility if there was a problem like we're having now. in the increasingly competitive world we live in, it's best to have more education. a degree will never hurt you.

rather than be so hostile to college/uni, has it occurred to you that you might come across all manner of courses that could help you pursue your cooking career? what if you decided to major in hospitality admnistration or business or food systems/policy or agriculture or something else that could only enhance cooking school?

in the us two well-regarded schools that offer undergrad and grad degrees is johnson and wales university and cornell university hospitality school. cornell is ivy league. emeril lagasse went to johnson and wales.

i'm just saying that it's good to have a back-up and a degree is just that. it is not a waste of time at all.

also, i was looking at the website for tafe. is that some sort of school like the university of phoenix in the us? one of those schools with lots of different locations and is out to make money? not so good.

make sure whatever place you attend has a good reputation. if you really wanna get some idea of things and have perspective, arrange to talk to restaurant industry professionals. seriously. you can call up some restaurants a few nice ones you like and talk to the manager or a chef - it's just like an informational interview. set up an appointment. look nice when you go and politely pick their brain. seek advice from people who are actually in the profession. i'm curious about what they'd say given the economy we're in.

rada
Jun 15th, 2009, 03:20 AM
Just do what makes you happy :)

Langers
Jun 15th, 2009, 06:44 AM
Today I told my family that I don't want to go to uni after high school, that I want to go to Tafe for cooking.

Everyone was fine with it. Except my grandma who started crying.

The view in my family is that if you don't go to uni, you're fucking dumb. Well then in that case I'm a fucking idiot.

WHY DOESN'T SHE JUST LET ME FUCKING LIVE MY FUCKING LIFE!? IF I WANT TO FUCKING JUMP IN FRONT OF A TRUCK OR JUMP OFF A FUCKING CLIFF, THEN FUCKING LET ME!!!
Mate, no offence but who cares what you're grandma thinks, and I think crying is taking a little bit too far. ;)

Uni is overrated. I know a lot of people who never went to uni and they are doing fine. I know a lot of people who started out doing uni and they quit, even in the 3rd year of their course. A lot of people start doing one course, end up doing another. And a lot of people just drop out full stop to start working.

You're only just leaving high school which means you're extremely young, 17 or something. At that age a lot, a LOT of people have no idea at all what they want to do or what they want to become, I didn't have a clue and still don't really.

And before anyone calls me an idiot and says I'm not smart enough to do uni, I am current at uni. I just think at times it's the biggest load of rubbish ever. :wavey:

Scotso
Jun 15th, 2009, 07:36 AM
Why do you not want to go to university? It's not an either/or thing, you can go to university and go to culinary school.

They just want what's best for you, and yes, despite what some people here are saying, that does include continuing your education. If you can go to university, you should.

Scotso
Jun 15th, 2009, 07:37 AM
And before anyone calls me an idiot and says I'm not smart enough to do uni, I am current at uni. I just think at times it's the biggest load of rubbish ever. :wavey:

As with all things, it's what you make of it.

supergrunt
Jun 15th, 2009, 07:38 AM
we can't all be winners like me

Langers
Jun 15th, 2009, 07:52 AM
As with all things, it's what you make of it.
Seems a lot of people make uni out to be stupid. I guess we can't all be unreasonable?

mariahdg
Jun 15th, 2009, 09:17 AM
choose the one there are tons of :weirdo: :cuckoo: :woohoo::haha:

Well, imo, cold heart wears higher education clothes is epic fail than others

Andreas
Jun 15th, 2009, 10:01 AM
What is tafe?

McPie
Jun 15th, 2009, 10:04 AM
shaddup, man :p cause you are not a failure ;)

























































......................compare to me :lol:

Dani12
Jun 15th, 2009, 11:00 AM
I know what you mean, societal expectations about uai's and university's are very strict. I'm going through the same thing right now, I am going to try and get into university but my marks are a worry. Just know that all of this isn't the be all of end all, opportunities will arise, you can go through back doors and most of the time things work out for the best.

Golovinjured.
Jun 15th, 2009, 11:47 AM
I was expected to go to uni straight after highschool and do medicine or law, by all my family - but didn't.

I wasn't ready, I'm still not ready. This is my second year out of highschool and I'm still not committed to it so I left it. I'm planning to do medicine, but I'm leaving it until I can commit myself and until I have enough money saved so that it's not something I need to worry about.

Not all of my family agrees, but who cares. As long as you can asure URSELF that you're doing the right thing it shouldn't be affecting you as much as it is.

There are worse things in life. :shrug: