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louisa.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 01:45 PM
Royal Court, Maria's Orchestra, Don't Knock the Dok... blah blah blah.
Time for us to join in the fun :devil:

Pick a title and put it in your sig. :) Simple as that.
The title you choose will have to fit in with the theme of Clinic; ie. mental institution, physio, hospital. :p
Edit: We have now expanded this to include spas and beauty salons.
Have fun :angel:

Titles:

schorsch - Official Masseur of the Jelena Clinic
Princeza - Official Psychiatrist of the Jelena Clinic
Ellery - Official Respiratory Therapist of the Jelena Clinic
Mikey. - Official Kleenex Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
louisa. - Official Morphine Injector of the Jelena Clinic
justine schnyder - Official Trainer of the Jelena Clinic
Wayn77 - Official Manicurist, Pedicurist and Towel Tidier of the Jelena Clinic
MaBaker - Official Glitter Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
Associated - Official Laboratory Consultant of the Jelena Clinic
дalex - Official Plastic Surgeon of the Jelena Clinic
MagicMilan - Official Gynaecologist of the Jelena Clinic
lepa brena - Official Tranquilliser Tester, Guinea Pig and Euthanizer of the Jelena Clinic
iheartjelenaj - Official Immunologist of the Jelena Clinic
Kampi - Official Guru, Sensei and Sigmund Freud of the Jelena Clinic
ivanban - Official Hawk-Eye Specialist Optician of the Jelena Clinic
Oneofakind0490 - Official Pre Match Hair & Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic
Optima - Official Chocolate Chip Cookie Baker of the Jelena Clinic
Wrekin – Official Air Ambulance Pilot of the Jelena Clinic
Hashim. - Official On-Court Medical Timeout Doctor of the Jelena Clinic
VirginMary - Glamour Overdose Nurse of the Jelena Clinic
Ian Aberdon – Official Condom, Porsche and Haggis Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
JustDoIt - Official Tampon Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
~Kiera~ - Official Picnicographer of the Jelena Clinic
josic – Official Acting Instructor of the Jelena Clinic
Пепи. - Official Drama and Dancing Queen of the Jelena Clinic
Tashi - Official Alcohol Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
Michael27 - Official Hairspray and Banana Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
JadeFox - Official Bitchslapper and Ghetto Therapist of the Jelena Clinic
jj_625 - Official Supplier of Matching Nail Polish for the Jelena Clinic
Wyna - Official Pharmacist of the Jelena Clinic
Јована – Official Water [Vodka] Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
Kim’s_Fan_4ever - Official Mascara Malfunction Specialist of the JJ Clinic
ms_nut - Official Heart Transplant Doctor of the Jelena Clinic
Foon_JJ - Official Chocolate Supplier of the Jelena Clinic
Chrono - Official ER Docter of the Jelena Clinic
orinocoy – Official Nutritionist and Hotel Room Guide of the Jelena Clinic
Illusionist - Official Feet Guardian of the Jelena Clinic
charlieluvtennis - Official Launderette Service Provider of the Jelena Clinic
oneandonly - Official Good Luck Charm of the Jelena Clinic
pica_pica - Official Accompanist of the Jelena Clinic
Bruno71 - Official Bonebreaker of the Jelena Clinic
Caralenko - Official Diva Cup of the Jelena Clinic
kikiriki - Official Sneki's Water Bottle of the Jelena Clinic

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 01:53 PM
I'm gonna be her official masseur :devil::hehehe:

Princeza
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:00 PM
Psychiatrist :unsure:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:01 PM
ok :lol:

Ellery
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:02 PM
Hmm. Interesting question.

Ellery
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:03 PM
Got it.

Can I be the official Respiratory Therapist?

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:06 PM
Ellery :lol:

Mikey.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:06 PM
Official Kleenex Supplier :D

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:10 PM
hopefully at least somebody gets my joke in terms of Jelena Clinic :sobbing:

louisa.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:14 PM
I will be... the official morphine injector :devil:





:secret: thank you schorschie :angel:

Ellery
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:16 PM
Ellery :lol:


Helping revive fainted JJ fans :p

justine schnyder
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:16 PM
I'll be the official trainer!!!1 :angel:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:29 PM
HEY, I am the masseur :mad: :sobbing: maybe you could be her foot cooler :sobbing: she needs it this days :lol:

justine schnyder
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:30 PM
Wayn :lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:33 PM
Or pedicurist in general...
and then in your sig : Now AO special: Foot Cooling Deluxe
:bigcry:

louisa.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:33 PM
Yah sorry Wayn, Schorsch's already nabbed the masseur position :sobbing: would you like to be the manicurist and pedicurist instead?

MaBaker
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:43 PM
Holy crap, I needed 5 minutes to understand what's this thread about :weirdo: :weirdo:

Can I be the official glitter supplier ?

justine schnyder
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:44 PM
MaBaker :lol: :worship:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 02:59 PM
mabaker :sobbing:

wayn :awww:

Snex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 03:51 PM
I would like to be Official care taker of her sneakers and socks. She surely needs someone for that. Especially to paint her old Reebok sneakers to look like her new Anta sneakers. "Green teeth" :lol:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 03:57 PM
Official Plastic Surgeon of the Jelena Clinic

MagicMilan
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:09 PM
official gynaecologist :D

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:17 PM
:rolls: I LOVE all your titles!!
I'll be the Official Tranquilliser Taster, what else? :shrug:

iheartjelenaj
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:17 PM
Official Immunologist

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:21 PM
Geez Wayn, will you have the time to be all that? Leave sth for other Jankobitches...:rolls:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:22 PM
:rolls: I LOVE all your titles!!
I'll be the Official Tranquilliser Tester, what else? :shrug:

Anesthesiologist or Painkillers Supplier would fit you just fine...;)

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:24 PM
Anesthesiologist or Painkillers Supplier would fit you just fine...;)

No, I help the jankobitches, not Jankobitch and what we need are the best tranquillisers.
edit: Oh, I know - I'll be the official guinea pig!

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:32 PM
What does guinea pig have to do with clinic? :lol:

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:38 PM
What does guinea pig have to do with clinic? :lol:

well, you test stuff on them, no? I can test the painkillers, massages, pedicure...
But I changed my mind...I'll be the official euthanizer and my job will be to put JJ down when her games gets too painful to watch.

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:43 PM
Ah, that guinea pig! :haha:

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:48 PM
Ah, that guinea pig! :haha:

:smash:

Kampi
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:51 PM
I'm the official Guru, Sensei 先生 (http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E5%85%88%E7%94%9F) and Sigmund Freud of Jelena Clinic.

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:58 PM
Wakarimashta Kampi-sensei.

Dalex and Priva :sobbing:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 05:58 PM
:smash:

What? I thought you might be one of those guinea pigs they have in waiting rooms or sth like that. :lol:

OMG Markus, you are so our guru & sensei! That position fits you perfectly.

Kampi
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:00 PM
What? I thought you might be one of those guinea pigs they have in waiting rooms or sth like that. :lol:

OMG Markus, you are so our guru & sensei! That position fits you perfectly.

I slightly expanded it.:lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:04 PM
Oh Kampi in this case Ana reads you like a book :devil::angel:

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:04 PM
OK, I wanna be Official Hawk-Eye Specialist Optician :cool:

Or Official Psychiatrist specialized for picnic-pathology :cool:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:08 PM
Ivanban :sobbing:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:08 PM
Oh Kampi in this case Ana reads you like a book :devil::angel:

:rolls:

I liked it better with no extensions, Markus. ;)

Kampi
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:13 PM
:rolls:

I liked it better with no extensions, Markus. ;)

But I like it that way, haha......wait, wait, wait I'm trying to analyse what your avatar tells us about your spiritual life......hmm, butt addiction...maybe.....no wait, Jelena addiction, yesss....that's it. Wait, OMG I think I'm having the same mental issue.:scared::lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:14 PM
Put it in your sigs :awww:

Oneofakind0490
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:18 PM
Hmmm. IDK what to be. Official Drama Director of the Jelena Clinic? Doesn't really work with a clinic. Maybe Official Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic?

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:19 PM
Wait, OMG I think I'm having the same mental issue.:scared::lol:

We should set up an appointment with Princeza (The Psychiatrist). :lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:21 PM
Hmmm. IDK what to be. Official Drama Director of the Jelena Clinic? Doesn't really work with a clinic. Maybe Official Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic?

Ya, the second one ;) maybe even "Pre-Match Make-Up Artist" :haha:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:22 PM
We should set up an appointment with Princeza (The Psychiatrist). :lol:

Just for the record, you two cant set up an appointment with me :haha:

Optima
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:23 PM
I wanna be either..Official Nail Polisher or Official Chocolate Chip Cookie Baker, can't decide.

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:24 PM
Maybe Official Hair & Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic?

Or a nurse...

Or pick sth from here:
http://www.alec.co.uk/free-career-assessment/medical-career-list.htm

Kampi
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:26 PM
We should set up an appointment with Princeza (The Psychiatrist). :lol:

I hope we can make an appointment asap....because it seems to be very serious.:eek::help::unsure::lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:27 PM
dalex :bigcry:
so glad I came up with this crazy thread :bigcry:
and btw everyone :worship: louisa. for running it :sobbing:

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:28 PM
a question for the native speakes and everyone else who lnows the answer: is it euthanizer or euthanasist?

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:28 PM
Just so for the record, you two cant set up an appointment with me :haha:

Like we would want to :ras:. We need to test your massage skills on a guinea pig first (like Zoja suggested :haha:).

MaBaker
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:30 PM
OK, I wanna be Official Hawk-Eye Specialist Optician :cool:

Now I want this :bigcry:

Wrekin
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:31 PM
Put me down for taxi driver

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:34 PM
What the hell!?! How dare you :mad: !?!

I have golden hands!!!!!!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
,
(but only because that stupid glitter of jj's always gets stuck on my hands and doesnt go off :bigcry: )

Optima
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:34 PM
Ok, so I wanna be Official Chocolate Chip Cookie Baker :angel:

I would be official "Puppy trainer and groomer", although that's a little too harsh. Ana :hug: You're not so bad.

MaBaker
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:38 PM
(but only because that stupid glitter of jj's always gets stuck on my hands and doesnt go off :bigcry: )
What what what :speakles: Stupid glitter ? :armed:

Optima
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:40 PM
Oh snap, I didn't realize it had to be within a "hospital" theme - but hey, someone has to keep Jelena munching on goodies, right? :hehehe:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:43 PM
oh noes, now i am in trouble :tape:
*quickly thinks of excuse*

MaBaker, I didnt want to tell you this, but... yes, JJ is seeing another.... GLITTER SUPPLIER!!! I am so sorry :bigcry: I didn't want to hurt you, so I kept it to myself.
For what it's worth his glitter is the one that's not of good quality and stupid. And dont worry, she stopped seeing him, but you know the glitter is still stuck on my hands :sobbing:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:47 PM
:rolls:
How can JJ be seeing another glitter supplier when Ma is the OFFICIAL one!? :haha:

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:48 PM
Now I want this :bigcry:

You can be Official Lip-Gloss Supplier of JJ Clinic :shrug:

MaBaker
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:52 PM
MaBaker, I didnt want to tell you this, but... yes, JJ is seeing another.... GLITTER SUPPLIER!!! I am so sorry :bigcry: I didn't want to hurt you, so I kept it to myself.
For what it's worth his glitter is the one that's not of good quality and stupid. And dont worry, she stopped seeing him, but you know the glitter is still stuck on my hands :sobbing:
Oh, I see...Come on Sugiyama :rocker2: :angel:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:54 PM
Well, (damn damn... fast gotta think of something :o ) you know I didn't think she would betray MaBaker either and nobody actually would have ever thought so obviously, but she did it behind everyone's back.
You know, but MaBaker's glitter is of such good quality, that during one of the massage sessions I was able to tell them apart right away and you know she then confessed.
I told her how you know she had to stop seeing him and she did.. so you know...
It was just a silly mistake, she learnt her lesson by now..

*sweats profusely by now :scared:*

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:55 PM
No one applied for Official On-Court Medical Timeout Doctor :bigcry:

Hashim.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:56 PM
Official On-Court Medical Timeout Doctor :p:angel::lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 06:57 PM
No one applied for Official On-Court Medical Timeout Doctor :bigcry:

Not true, we have a trainer :) Thats what they call them on tv :p

Hmmm, I suppose we should distinguish between Doctor and Physio/Trainer then :lol:

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:01 PM
JJ will surely need an Epidemiologist for Life-threatening Cases :scratch:

Marilyn Monheaux
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:03 PM
Glamour overdose nurse :drool:

Wrekin
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:04 PM
Oh snap, I didn't realize it had to be within a "hospital" theme - but hey, someone has to keep Jelena munching on goodies, right? :hehehe:

Oh, OK, make it ambulance driver then :lol:

ce
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:06 PM
i cant think of anything :(

Hashim.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:07 PM
i cant think of anything :(

me too:o:lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:09 PM
Oh, OK, make it ambulance driver then :lol:
ya thats good :worship:

or how about ambulance helicopter pilot? :lol: :sobbing:

Danilo is making us all wait with his choice, I'm getting nervous :scared:

ce
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:11 PM
official shoes changer ?

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:13 PM
I'm sure JJ will need PR Manager for her new clinic

Wrekin
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:19 PM
a question for the native speakes and everyone else who lnows the answer: is it euthanizer or euthanasist?

euthanizer I should think :)

It's not actually legal in this country :lol:

euthanize Definition

transitive verb euthanized -·nized′, euthanizing -·niz′·ing
to put to death by euthanasia

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:20 PM
Dignitas :tape:

Wrekin
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:26 PM
or how about ambulance helicopter pilot? :lol: :sobbing:



OK, I'll go with that

(We call them air ambulances)

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:27 PM
:p but keep away from anything that has 18 on it.

Ian Aberdon
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:35 PM
Euthanasia:

I know the correct term Zoja.......but I'd have to kill ya! :lol:

Princeza
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:35 PM
Appointments needed? :angel:

Princeza
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:36 PM
Euthanasia:

I know the correct term Zoja.......but I'd have to kill ya! :lol:

:haha: @yours

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:44 PM
Rich, :haha:

@Princeza
Markus and I are addicted to JJ. Is there a cure?

Ian Aberdon
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:46 PM
You asking me? I'm only the bloody condom supplier!!! :haha:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:47 PM
:haha:

Optima
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:57 PM
:spit:

dalex, best ever :yeah:

Princeza
Jan 22nd, 2009, 07:59 PM
Rich, :haha:

@Princeza
Markus and I are addicted to JJ. Is there a cure?

Hmmm first I would have to determine the clinical diagnosis and the state in which you both are. From what I read you seem to suffer from delusional disorder also know as “The JJ GS victory hallucination”. There are cures, if you WANT to be free from this. Give me your symptoms and I will make a deeper analysis to save you.

Oneofakind0490
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:04 PM
I like the Official Pre Match Hair & Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic. Thanksidea guys :D

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:09 PM
oh noes :sobbing:

Ian aberdon :haha:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:12 PM
Thanks Princeza, but I've decided that I don't wanna be cured. :angel:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:18 PM
who does :angel: ?

Ian Aberdon
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:18 PM
I like this condom supplier idea...I can penetrate new markets......:)

Princeza
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:20 PM
Phew, I'm relieved because I can only analyze JJ.
I wanted to be "psycopath" first but now that there's an euthanizer, I'll stay psychiatrist :scared:
I'm too afraid.

Just Do It
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:22 PM
I'd like to be official tampon supplier.

I hope that is okay ? :unsure:

Ciarán
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:23 PM
Official Irish Representative


Please :D

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:23 PM
I like this condom supplier idea...I can penetrate new markets......:)

how about expanding to the chinse market with ANTA-baby pills then?

Ciarán
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:24 PM
Whoops!


Official Witch Doctor

Ian Aberdon
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:31 PM
Might have to test the ANTA Baby pills on one of Zoja's guinea pigs first I think! :lol:

And we now have an official Irish Witch Doctor! :haha:

(ps. dunno about ANTA Baby pills, I believe some Spanish guy called Nando is trying to market ANA Baby Pills...:devil:)

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:36 PM
Oh noes, I've read that ANA baby pills have several side-effects such as constant ajdeing, fistpumping and unstoppable excitement.

(Fernando actually had no problem with the ajdeing and unstoppable excitement, but the fistpumping hurt during you know what, so thats why they split up)

~Kiera~
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:37 PM
I'll be the Official Picnicographer of the Jelena Clinic

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:42 PM
:sobbing: kiera

josic
Jan 22nd, 2009, 08:57 PM
Hi think the clinic need an actining instructor, jelena would improve her acting and ist a god alternativ therapy. ;)

Snex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:14 PM
:haha:

I changed my mind. I don't want to be Official care taker of blah, blah, etc, but Official Laboratory Consultant in Jelena Clinic. Is it OK? Did anybody apply for this position before me?

I found this position following the link that somebody posted in this thread. :rolls:

Dinayer
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:36 PM
drama queen?

please :hearts:

louisa.
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:36 PM
omg guys :sobbing: every single title is perfect :D
I've edited the first post, check to see if i got yours right. If not, or if i've accidentally missed you, let me know and i'll fix that up right away :angel:
Sorry about the long delay, had to sleep :p

Ian Aberdon
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:51 PM
This is a bloody big clinic...mind you it IS JJ we're talking about! :lol:

Night all...off to test one of my products...:haha:

(JOKING, I'm JOKING!!! :haha:)

Ellery
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:54 PM
What an awesome clinic to be part of :hearts:

So glad I am working here.

Ciarán
Jan 22nd, 2009, 09:59 PM
I'm Retarded.


Delete me NOW. Thanks :D

ms_nut
Jan 22nd, 2009, 10:15 PM
:lol:, Has anyone selected bone (crushing) doctor yet?

Snex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 10:39 PM
OMG! I made 100 posts, and became a Senior Member. 100 posts for 1 month! Already :confused:. And I found a new job in Jelena Clinic :drool:. Did anybody consider the amount of our salaries?

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 10:41 PM
:haha:
You're all completely insane.

P.S. www.euthanasia.org.nz and www.dailycatholic.org claim it's 'euthanasist' after all. :shrug: Ah, well, I'll be both. :lol:

ivanban
Jan 22nd, 2009, 10:57 PM
OMG! I made 100 posts, and became a Senior Member. 100 posts for 1 month! Already :confused:. And I found a new job in Jelena Clinic :drool:. Did anybody consider the amount of our salaries?

Well, considering world-wide recession, I'm afraid all the staff in the JJ Clinic will have to work pro bono :shrug:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:00 PM
Oh well, I cant complain, screw the $$$ :hehehe::angel:

I wonder how nobody picked : official teeth bleacher :bigcry:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:00 PM
:haha: @ Glamour Overdose Nurse! Brilliant!

Tashi
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:10 PM
I do come from the land of rum so for all the Jankobitches out there who need a bit(or a lot) of it during her matches: Official Alcohol Supplier of the Jelena Clinic.

Brena
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:12 PM
:haha: @ Glamour Overdose Nurse! Brilliant!

I love it too!

http://img12.nnm.ru/imagez/gallery/2/4/0/8/1/240810412294ed0343a24ca27cc06897.jpg
:sobbing:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:13 PM
Brilliant :sobbing: Alcohol for her stressed fans and alcohol for JJ when she scrapes her knee or arm or something :sobbing:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:18 PM
Great Tash!

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Sport/Pix/pictures/2008/05/18/jankovic-big2.jpg
* couldn't find the one in which she pours champagne in her mouth

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:22 PM
Lol its in the captions thread quoted a thousand times :lol:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:22 PM
I wonder how nobody picked : official teeth bleacher :bigcry:

I was seriously considering taking that one. Or Official Dental Bleach Supplier :sobbing:

But I was thinking plastic surgeon is more important to JJ, so... :angel:

Lol its in the captions thread quoted a thousand times :lol:

Yeah, I remember seeing it somewhere recently. Some hilarious captions there. :lol:

schorsch
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:34 PM
more important than her smile :speakles: ?

ya, except reetard's caption :rolleyes:

Marilyn Monheaux
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:37 PM
I love it too!

http://img12.nnm.ru/imagez/gallery/2/4/0/8/1/240810412294ed0343a24ca27cc06897.jpg
:sobbing:

HOT:hearts:

дalex
Jan 22nd, 2009, 11:43 PM
more important than her smile :speakles: ?


Her smile is priceless. :inlove:
Still, plastic surgeon >>>>> bleacher, duh!

Michael27
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:07 AM
Has anyone chosen this:

"Official Hairspray Supplier of the JJ Clinic".

Marilyn Monheaux
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:18 AM
^^ZOMG!!!:speakles: Take it! What would JJ do without it?

Michael27
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:25 AM
Thanks, I'll take the job.


"Official Hairspray Supplier of the JJ Clinic". :hearts::yippee::kiss:

schorsch
Jan 23rd, 2009, 01:16 AM
I hope you and Oneofakind0490 work well together :p

louisa.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 08:56 AM
I'm Retarded.


Delete me NOW. Thanks :D

Well if your sure.... :awww:

JadeFox
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:58 AM
Okay, official Bitchslapper of the Jelena Clinic hasn't been taken already right?:p

louisa.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 10:07 AM
nope :p would you like that prestigeous title?

JadeFox
Jan 23rd, 2009, 10:29 AM
nope :p would you like that prestigeous title?

Why yes I would.;):lol:

Kim's_fan_4ever
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:09 PM
You are sooo creative :rolls: Too bad I'm not. Any ideas for me? :angel:

ivanban
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:18 PM
I am pleased to inform all the staff of the JJ Clinic that my experimental Hawk-Eye therapy is doing wonders for our main patient, JJ herself, which all of you were able to see in today's match :cool:

Though, maybe this experimental therapy is working even too well, cause she also spotted some minute bugs or particles on court at the beginning of match and requested from ball-kids to remove it :silly:

jj_625
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:34 PM
Can I be...the Official Supplier of Matching Nail Polish ? :p

louisa.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:51 PM
of course :p

jj_625
Jan 23rd, 2009, 12:52 PM
:lol:
perhaps I'll even change the colour of the title corresponding to her current colour of nail polish.:angel:

josic
Jan 23rd, 2009, 01:07 PM
You are sooo creative Too bad I'm not. Any ideas for me?

well i think jelena needs some help for her orientation. maybe you could help her to find the right locker room?;)

Michael27
Jan 23rd, 2009, 01:40 PM
I have just thought of two very important skillful jobs still available.

Official Water Supplier for Jelena and Her Mother Snezana.

Official Banana Supplier.

louisa.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 01:54 PM
:lol:
perhaps I'll even change the colour of the title corresponding to her current colour of nail polish.:angel:

:speakles: great idea

Nina.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 02:05 PM
can I become the official pharmacist?

josic
Jan 23rd, 2009, 02:07 PM
who wants to be the helicopter pilot for her time in wimbeldon?:)

louisa.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 02:17 PM
can I become the official pharmacist?
sure can :D

Nina.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 02:29 PM
great :banana:

Michael27
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:01 PM
Official Banana Supplier
Official Water Supplier


If no one wants these two jobs, can I add them to my responsibilities.

schorsch
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:03 PM
who wants to be the helicopter pilot for her time in wimbeldon?:)

believe it or not, but this job is already taken :bigcry:

this thread is hilarious :bigcry:

ivan :sobbing:

schorsch
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:07 PM
associ change your sig :awww: You can do that in CP and then edit sig :p

Jovana.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:15 PM
Can I be Sneki's water supplier? :angel:

MaBaker
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:23 PM
Can I be Sneki's vodka supplier? :angel:
Of course :angel:

Jovana.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:25 PM
^ :haha:

Princeza
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:41 PM
^ :haha:

You take care of Sneki, k?

Jovana.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 03:41 PM
You take care of Sneki, k?

k :awww:

Brena
Jan 23rd, 2009, 04:58 PM
k :awww:

Hey, mysterious Jovana! I've got a couple of reps from you, but I've never seen you post. :wavey:

Jovana.
Jan 23rd, 2009, 05:47 PM
Hey, mysterious Jovana! I've got a couple of reps from you, but I've never seen you post. :wavey:

Hello lepa brena :wavey: (I love your username :lol:) . I dont post much here, but I'm a JJ fan ;)

Dinayer
Jan 23rd, 2009, 07:46 PM
I wanna be the dancing Queen too :inlove:

Can I? :angel:

JadeFox
Jan 23rd, 2009, 08:23 PM
I would like to request to add another title to my clinic duties:

Official Ghetto Therapist.

Let me explain to all my non American white JJ fans. You see, we black American folk have something called "Ghetto Therapy" in which instead of giving out professional sounding advice, we essentially tell you the cold hard truth. As in, "Bitch quit admiring yourself on the big screen and focus on the match!" And "Vaseline on your teeth may make you smile easier, but it won't improve your serve!"

I hope you can get what I'm trying to say here.:lol:

дalex
Jan 23rd, 2009, 08:54 PM
I approve new additions to your titles. Though I dunno if my approval means anything since I'm just a plastic surgeon in our reputable clinic. :)

дalex
Jan 23rd, 2009, 08:57 PM
Oh and I think we're in desperate need of an Official Mascara Malfunction Specialist of the JJ Clinic. :lol:

Is anyone interested in that position?

Ian Aberdon
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:13 PM
Well don't look at the condom supplier...I've got my hands full....:lol:

MaBaker
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:14 PM
I would like to request to add another title to my clinic duties:

Official Ghetto Therapist.

Let me explain to all my non American white JJ fans. You see, we black American folk have something called "Ghetto Therapy" in which instead of giving out professional sounding advice, we essentially tell you the cold hard truth. As in, "Bitch quit admiring yourself on the big screen and focus on the match!" And "Vaseline on your teeth may make you smile easier, but it won't improve your serve!"

I hope you can get what I'm trying to say here.:lol:

So,Ghetto therapy = Serbian therapy
Of course, we would add "Bitch quit admiring yourself on the big screen and focus on the match!BRE!" , but it's the same :shrug:

schorsch
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:17 PM
Ya, its not the the same without the bre :mad: in Greek its vre :hearts:

Kim's_fan_4ever
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:20 PM
Oh and I think we're in desperate need of an Official Mascara Malfunction Specialist of the JJ Clinic. :lol:

Is anyone interested in that position?

Me me me!!! I don't have a title yet :awww:
Can I steal your idea? :p

дalex
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:27 PM
Yes, of course! The job is yours as soon as you put it in your sig.

Kim's_fan_4ever
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:30 PM
Haha done. Thanks :D

дalex
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:35 PM
Now do your job! She's been picking her eyelashes many times in the first three rounds. :lol:

JadeFox
Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:58 PM
So,Ghetto therapy = Serbian therapy
Of course, we would add "Bitch quit admiring yourself on the big screen and focus on the match!BRE!" , but it's the same :shrug:

Huh, interesting.

schorsch
Jan 23rd, 2009, 10:01 PM
Geez dalex, kim just got her job and you are making her work so hard right away :rolleyes:

Uhm, actually...y not :p

iheartjelenaj
Jan 24th, 2009, 02:55 AM
Thanks for the laughs, everyone! Y'all are so creative. :lol: @ Glamour Overdose Nurse and Ghetto Therapist.

It's too bad clinics don't deal w/clothes and fashion 'cuz JJ & ANTA need to make some major changes to her outfits. And shoes! :p

Kim's_fan_4ever
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:42 AM
The Optician NEEDS FIRED!!!

:sobbing:

Princeza
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:52 AM
I need a psychiatrist.

MaBaker
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:57 AM
Euthanasist needed.

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:57 AM
OK, I'm off to put her out of the misery...

Kim's_fan_4ever
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:58 AM
Jovana with her vodka supplies needed. And I mean lots of vodka.

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:58 AM
Euthanasist needed.

JJ first. Me second. But I'll leave you the instructions.

Jovana.
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:59 AM
vodka supplies might help in this case :drink: :hatoff:

Jovana.
Jan 25th, 2009, 01:59 AM
Jovana with her vodka supplies needed. And I mean lots of vodka.

:lol: omg mind reader.

дalex
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:00 AM
No more plastic surgeries for you, missy! [Alex goes on holiday :lol:]

Michael27
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:02 AM
Obviously she had a shortage of Hairspray.

I've arranged for an additional box to be delivered to her for her next tournament.

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:02 AM
Why don't we have a lobotomist?

Princeza
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:04 AM
Obviously she had a shortage of Hairspray.

I've arranged for an additional box to be delivered to her for her next tournament.

There's no next tournament. We won't let her go away like this.
Lucky her she's not playing open gaz de france or I would have thrown some shoes at her. :weirdo:

Jovana.
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:05 AM
I should cut down on the vodka before the match :o clearly made her all dizzy :o

MaBaker
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:07 AM
Lucky her she's not playing open gaz de france or I would have thrown some shoes at her. :weirdo:
:lol: I can't wait for the fed cup :angel:

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:07 AM
I should cut down on the vodka before the match :o clearly made her all dizzy :o

Was she drinking water from Sneki's bottle??

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:09 AM
:lol: I can't wait for the fed cup :angel:

a shoe?

http://elektro80.electro-music.com/articlepix/16_Ton_Weight_MP_classic.jpg

Michael27
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:10 AM
There's no next tournament. We won't let her go away like this.
Lucky her she's not playing open gaz de france or I would have thrown some shoes at her. :weirdo:


I better cancel the hairspray order then:lol:

Jovana.
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:11 AM
Was she drinking water from Sneki's bottle??

yeah they shared it :o my vodka supplies are running out :sobbing:

Princeza
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:11 AM
:lol: I can't wait for the fed cup :angel:

You do the job then. If it's not enough I will catch her at RG.
I will print the :weirdo: on the shoes.

MaBaker
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:12 AM
a shoe?

http://elektro80.electro-music.com/articlepix/16_Ton_Weight_MP_classic.jpg
You read my mind :angel:

Snex
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:21 AM
JJ, I want to see you immediately in my laboratory! I want to check how much vodka you have in your blood! Otherwise I'll call the euthanisist! :mad:

louisa.
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:24 AM
:banghead:
Troops, gather your supplies, we are in for a lonnng night of drinking :weirdo:

Tashi
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:25 AM
Alcohol for all my Jankobitches!:drink: Drink up me mateys, jo ho jo ho.

~Kiera~
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:28 AM
Why don't we have a lobotomist?

It appears a lobotomy was performed sometime during the off-season, so a lobotomist would be surplus to requirements at this point.

;)

louisa.
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:30 AM
^ :haha: :haha:

дalex
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:31 AM
I can do a brainsuction if you want? :shrug:

Tashi
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:32 AM
Is there a brain to suck?:shrug:

дalex
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:33 AM
Maybe not... Musclesuction?

Tashi
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:36 AM
^YES! :rolls:

Brena
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:37 AM
Maybe not... Musclesuction?

JJ's comment on this surprising loss:

http://hotlineoncall.nationaljournal.com/arnold-schwarzenegger.jpg

''I'll be back!''

дalex
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:40 AM
OK then, musclesution it is! While I'm at it I'll deform her face so she never ever feels like looking at the big screen again! Take that, Jelly baby!

louisa.
Jan 25th, 2009, 02:53 AM
:rolls: musclesuction :spit:

louisa.
Jan 25th, 2009, 03:02 AM
yah Alize better win :sobbing:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:07 AM
Erm...any need of a condom & red Porsche supplier in this dark, dark time? :lol:

JadeFox
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:10 AM
Erm...any need of a condom & red Porsche supplier in this dark, dark time? :lol:

Yeah, she might need some booty after this one.

Just let me bitchslap her a couple of times first.;):devil:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:12 AM
You're free to bitchslap, Jade! :yeah:

JadeFox
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:14 AM
Great!

*Books flight for Serbia*

*Warms up hands for maximum bitchslap impact*

Ian Aberdon
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:17 AM
I think everyone else is either:

i. in the clinic
ii. sleeping
iii. off to Australia to get hold of JJ
iv. off to Serbia to lie in wait

:lol:

josic
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:42 AM
hmmmmmmmmm will jelena need a offivial doping doc?:tape:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 25th, 2009, 08:48 AM
Actually Josic your services are needed - can you instruct JJ to act like a No.1 tennis player? :lol:

josic
Jan 25th, 2009, 09:05 AM
Actually Josic your services are needed - can you instruct JJ to act like a No.1 tennis player?

i think i have to blame my self for this lose. i was telling jelena she schould looke how a real nr.1 acts on court and my example was venus williams :help:. so maybe i schuld retire now?:crying2:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 25th, 2009, 09:20 AM
Tell her she's Bartoli! :help:

MaBaker
Jan 26th, 2009, 02:39 PM
I've just realized we don't have Official Fan Supporter of the :weirdo: Clinic. After JJ bs results, there should be someone who will make that inspiring speech how things can get only better from now.

Brena
Jan 26th, 2009, 04:43 PM
I've just realized we don't have Official Fan Supporter of the :weirdo: Clinic. After JJ bs results, there should be someone who will make that inspiring speech how things can get only better from now.

Well, they certainly can't get any worse...




inspiring enough? :)

MaBaker
Jan 26th, 2009, 05:49 PM
^Yeah...and very well written as well.

Michael27
Jan 26th, 2009, 05:55 PM
Am I allowed a Whisky instead of Vodka?:D:)

MaBaker
Jan 26th, 2009, 06:14 PM
^Sure Michael, you are a JJ fan , it's highly recommended to drink whatever you have that includes alcohol :)

Wrekin
Jan 26th, 2009, 06:29 PM
Well, they certainly can't get any worse...
:)

I wish I shared your confidence :rolleyes:

Am I allowed a Whisky instead of Vodka

Mine's a Large Glenmorangie, if you're buying :p

Brena
Jan 26th, 2009, 06:32 PM
I wish I shared your confidence :rolleyes:

I'm hopelessly optimistic. :sobbing:


Mine's a Large Glenmorangie, if you're buying :p


I'll have a bottle of methanol. :drink:

Wrekin
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:00 PM
^ All that's reminded me I had a bottle of 12 yr old Jameson for Christmas (how could I forget :scratch:)

I'm feeling much better already :silly:

-NAJ-
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:14 PM
Sipaj viski preko malo leda
CRV-KuWD6Sw

Ian Aberdon
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:17 PM
Can I be the Haggis Provider for the JJ clinic? Wee sleekit, tim'rous co'ering beastie....or something! :lol: Och aye the noo!

MaBaker
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:22 PM
^Are you collecting jobs ? :lol:

Brena
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:28 PM
Can I be the Haggis Provider for the JJ clinic? Wee sleekit, tim'rous co'ering beastie....or something! :lol: Och aye the noo!

haggis Show phonetics
noun [U]
a dish which comes from Scotland consisting of various sheep's organs cut up with onions and spices and cooked inside a sheep's stomach

I'm sorry I looked it up...

Ian Aberdon
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:39 PM
Haggis :devil:...NOW you know why us Scots are complete nutters!!! :lol:

Not as sorry as the sheep :devil:

Ana: There ain't much doin' for a condom & porsche supplier just now...must be the credit crunch :lol:

Wrekin
Jan 26th, 2009, 07:49 PM
I'm sorry I looked it up...

As a Sassenach who lived in Scotland for a while, I can tell you I got quite partial to haggis suppers (deep-fried haggis served with plenty of chips). I can recommend it....

In fact I could do with one right now after all this whiskey :lol:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 26th, 2009, 08:09 PM
Ken, deep-fried reminds me I must get a deep fried Mars Bar some time soon!!! Heart-attack food!! :lol:

Wrekin
Jan 26th, 2009, 08:16 PM
Ken, deep-fried reminds me I must get a deep fried Mars Bar some time soon!!! Heart-attack food!! :lol:

Now that's a culinary adventure I'm too timid to tackle!

ms_nut
Jan 26th, 2009, 11:57 PM
I don't want to be the official bone crusher of the JJ clinic anymore.. I want to be the official cakes supplier of the JJ clinic.. that's the only way she can beat Bartoli anymore, by distracting her with cakes..:rolleyes:

louisa.
Jan 27th, 2009, 12:15 AM
Ken, deep-fried reminds me I must get a deep fried Mars Bar some time soon!!! Heart-attack food!! :lol:

Before I die, I want to try those. It will probably be what kills me :drool: :lol:

Ian Aberdon
Jan 27th, 2009, 07:19 AM
MMMMMMMM all that hot chocolate & caramel...not to mention the fat content......:lick:

Brena
Jan 27th, 2009, 12:53 PM
Ken, deep-fried reminds me I must get a deep fried Mars Bar some time soon!!! Heart-attack food!! :lol:

I'd rather have haggis.

Ian Aberdon
Jan 27th, 2009, 07:09 PM
Baa-baa-baa-baa-baa.........

Just Do It
Jan 28th, 2009, 11:49 AM
I finally updated my sig :angel:

Mynarco
Jan 28th, 2009, 10:18 PM
I am IN

Official hairdresser of the Jelena Clinic?

schorsch
Jan 28th, 2009, 11:06 PM
taken :p you have to choose something else.

Foon_JJ
Jan 29th, 2009, 04:03 AM
I'm IN.
Official hairspray supplier and Chocolate supplier from Hong Kong of Jelena Clinic :D
May I?

Mynarco
Jan 29th, 2009, 05:26 AM
how about...Emergency room Doctor?

Foon_JJ
Jan 29th, 2009, 05:54 AM
how about...Emergency room Doctor?

I really want JJ come again next year :kiss:

louisa.
Jan 29th, 2009, 06:50 AM
I'm IN.
Official hairspray supplier and Chocolate supplier from Hong Kong of Jelena Clinic :D
May I?
Hairspray is taken but you can have chocolate! :D

how about...Emergency room Doctor?
:yeah: Sure

Foon_JJ
Jan 29th, 2009, 06:57 AM
Hairspray is taken but you can have chocolate! :D


:yeah: Sure

Thanks Louisa:bounce:

orinocoy
Feb 5th, 2009, 01:04 PM
I volunteer for official nutritionist and hotel room guide ;)

ChriS.
Feb 10th, 2009, 09:48 PM
I finally updated my sig :angel:
Official tampon supplier of Jelena Clinic and stalker of Don't knock the Dok :devil::lol::help:

Illusionist
Feb 16th, 2009, 02:27 AM
I'd like to be her official feet guardian :D

Ian Aberdon
Feb 16th, 2009, 07:09 AM
Well - she's had a few de-feets recently...arf! Heh...ahem :rolleyes:

Ian Aberdon
Feb 24th, 2009, 09:16 PM
Well I think I'll relinquish my duties...not much demand for Porsches in a Credit Crunch with JJ's slump in form, plus I doubt there's much call for condoms in JJ's world! :lol:

Snex
Feb 25th, 2009, 08:27 AM
I also must leave my position in JJ clinic. I volunteered as long as I could, but she never appeared in my laboratory. Besides, who needs laboratory consultant in the world shaken by economic crisis.

schorsch
Feb 25th, 2009, 02:47 PM
Hmm... You two signed contracts when getting the jobs, didnt you read the part written with small letters :ras:

The JJ clinic committee will consult what fines you will get :devil:

Brena
Feb 25th, 2009, 02:48 PM
Hmm... You two signed contracts when getting the jobs, didnt you read the part written with small letters :ras:

The JJ clinic committee will consult what fines you will get :devil:

Half their prize money and their first-born child?

schorsch
Feb 25th, 2009, 02:54 PM
half of 0 = 0, so no :devil:

i'm still thinking about the first-born child thingie...

Snex
Feb 25th, 2009, 05:12 PM
Half their prize money and their first-born child?

:lol: Oh, if that's the final decision of your committee, i can consider myself very lucky. I'll give you my first born child with the pleasure, but i'm afraid that you'll bring him back to me immediately :devil:.

Oh yes, and i'm also giving you all the prize money, all $5. :lol: However, i accept the deal.

Ian Aberdon
Feb 25th, 2009, 07:08 PM
DAMN those penalty clauses! :lol:

charlieluvtennis
Mar 29th, 2009, 01:47 PM
Can i be the official finance manager? :lol:

louisa.
Mar 29th, 2009, 02:21 PM
:lol: sure thing.


Congrats on passing your driving test! :yeah:

charlieluvtennis
Mar 29th, 2009, 02:23 PM
Thanks louisa! :D