PDA

View Full Version : help needed- question regarding HIV and gay sex


goseles
Dec 24th, 2006, 06:04 AM
Ok, I've spent some time investigating the internet and still don't have a clear answer. I was hoping someone on here could help me out. I received a call from my county health dept. a few days ago saying someone who tested HIV+ gave them my name as someone they had sexual relations with. I went and got tested and the results came back negative. I was feeling very relieved until today when I found out who the person was who tested positive. It was an aquaintance of mine who I messed around with twice, once in October and once in November (the 11th, to be exact). On both occasions I was the top and penetrated him without a condom, pulling out before climaxing. I tested negative two days ago-- from Nov. 11th to Dec. 21 is almost 6 weeks. I've read various things on the internet about time needed for the body to signify the HIV virus, ranging anywhere from 2 weeks to 6 months. I know for sure I'll continue to be tested for the next few months, but I was just wondering if anyone knew about how likely it is that I am actually HIV+. Yes, I know it was a stupid thing to do- we all do stupid things and have to suffer the consequences, which is what I'm doing now. If anyone is knowledgable on how long it takes to appear in tests, or just has some kind words to say, I'd appreciate it-- it's not exactly the easiest thing to go through. :)

Monica@53
Dec 24th, 2006, 07:17 AM
My understanding is that the current technology that they have available to detect HIV is pretty reliable at making detections from 6 weeks of infection. However (depending on where you live) the public health policy may be to advise patients to consider themselves in the clear after a negative test at 3 months from possible infection - this is probably for legal reasons as much as it is a historical policy from when older technologies were in place.

Am by no means an expert on this (just relaying information from when I discussed this with my partner who was a policy officer in the state health department's HIV/Infectious Diseases branch for 3 years). If you have further concerns it would be worth going back to the doctor/sexual health clinic and inquiring -- I'm sure they'd be more than forthcoming. Best of luck :)

drake3781
Dec 24th, 2006, 10:01 AM
I think you are fine, for reasons I don't want to get into on Christmas Eve. But based on what you describe, you are fine.

ImaVeggie
Dec 24th, 2006, 01:00 PM
From National HIV Testing Resources - A Service of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention - FAQs (http://www.hivtest.org/subindex.cfm?FuseAction=FAQ)

If I think I have been exposed to HIV, how soon can I get tested?

To find out when you should be tested, discuss it with your testing site staff or personal physician. The tests commonly used to detect HIV infection actually look for antibodies produced by your body to fight HIV. Most people will develop detectable antibodies within 3 months after infection, the average being 20 days. In rare cases, it can take 6-12 months. During the time between exposure and the test, it is important to avoid any behavior that might result in exposure to blood, semen, or vaginal secretions.


Goseles, this must be weighing heavily on you and I hope you have people close to you to talk with. I don't know you but you will be in my thoughts.

Steffica Greles
Dec 24th, 2006, 01:26 PM
I can't add anything here.

But I do wish you the best of luck and my sincerest sympathies for what you're going through.

At the moment I'd say things look favourable to you, so try to draw strength from that. :)

Kart
Dec 24th, 2006, 01:49 PM
Obviously you're not clear but I believe most people that are going to, will test positive within six weeks so if you're negative two days ago you can take it as a significant, reassuring result.

Seeing that you were giving rather than receiving I think that also reduces your risk a bit also.

I think the three month period is what most people would consider the time after which you can relax but personally I'd have a test at six months as well and then you can sleep easy.

If you want stats, I think about 80% of the infected will have some kind of seroconversion illness within 4 weeks and will probably test positive pretty soon after it.

BARBIE
Dec 24th, 2006, 02:54 PM
I cannot help you by giving any information but I wish you Best Of Luck. :)

Monica_Rules
Dec 24th, 2006, 02:55 PM
Yeah agree with what everyone has said here so far. 3 months is kind of seen as the 'barrier' but its not the same for everyone. Negative at 6 weeks is a good sign so far.

One sign could be did you have flu like symptoms within the two weeks post the intercourse? But a long lasting flu, that could be a sign that you have been infected but then again you might have just had a bad cold.

U being the 'top' will have reduced you chances of being infected.

Hopefully you will be ok :)

CooCooCachoo
Dec 24th, 2006, 03:04 PM
Good luck and more wisdom in the future :wavey:

goseles
Dec 24th, 2006, 04:10 PM
Thanks to all who replied, pretty much everything said is stuff I already knew, but it's nice to hear it from others as well. At the moment I'm just trying not to think about it, as I can't possibly know anything more until I go get tested again.

Monica Rules, no, nothing like you described-- just some congestion from (I'm assuming) allergies, but nothing to really even hinder my everyday activities. I'll take that as a good sign. :)

I would never consider being the bottom during unprotected sex, but for some reason before I occasionally wouldn't mind being the top if the other person wanted it. That's just crazy, especially coming from me, who knows that any unsafe sex is just that, UNSAFE for both parties involved... I guess it was just one of those "oh, it'll never happen to me" moments... :rolleyes:

practiceboy
Dec 24th, 2006, 04:52 PM
I've volunteered at various HIV clinics and prevention education programs for the past several years, and what everyone's said here is basically great information. I think there are three main points that have been stated so far:

1) Penetrating carries a lower risk than being penetrated.

2) A negative test at 6 weeks is a good initial indication (though by no means dispositive), any test at 3 months is almost certainly an accurate result, and any test at 6 months should be entirely accurate.

3) If you haven't experienced the temporary seroconversion illness that a couple mentioned, this is also a good initial indication (though by no means dispositive).

Anyway, best of luck!

venus_rulez
Dec 24th, 2006, 06:18 PM
I always thought it took 6 months to be virtually 100% positive that you haven't developed the virus. Like others have said, 6 weeks out, you've tested negative is a very good sign, but you should continue to get tested and should maybe shy away from sexual beahvior until you're absolutely sure.

!<blocparty>!
Dec 24th, 2006, 07:28 PM
You seem to have been lucky. I hope this has made you realise a few things. ;)

TdF_DBLL
Dec 24th, 2006, 08:32 PM
Best of luck with this :hug:, sounds like you're fine now, but future tests must prove it, but I think you can feel pretty relieved now.

charmedRic
Dec 24th, 2006, 10:31 PM
I've volunteered at various HIV clinics and prevention education programs for the past several years, and what everyone's said here is basically great information. I think there are three main points that have been stated so far:

1) Penetrating carries a lower risk than being penetrated.

2) A negative test at 6 weeks is a good initial indication (though by no means dispositive), any test at 3 months is almost certainly an accurate result, and any test at 6 months should be entirely accurate.

3) If you haven't experienced the temporary seroconversion illness that a couple mentioned, this is also a good initial indication (though by no means dispositive).

Anyway, best of luck!

Ditto.

kittyking
Dec 24th, 2006, 10:46 PM
You should be okay but if I was you I would still go back in about a month or so to be tested just incase, I dont want to make you more worried but getting tested again would bring you a heap of reassurances.
Merry Xmas

goseles
Dec 25th, 2006, 12:24 AM
You guys are awesome! :hug: Thanks for the support and kind words, it is scary but I'm not letting it ruin the holiday. I'm off work until the 3rd (woo hoo!) and there's no sense being down. :)

Yes, I will certainly get tested in about a month's time, for that will be the 3 month threshold to cross. Keeping fingers crossed...

Have a happy holiday, everyone! In spite of my low number of posts, I've been a member for many years now and visit most everyday. I'll make an effort to post more so I can get to know you all better. :D :cool:

Bacardi
Dec 25th, 2006, 04:59 AM
goseles, God be with you, you're in my thoughts and prayers. I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed everything turns out OK. Just keep getting tested, I would do it at least regularly for the next year and then things should be alright. It's hit or miss with HIV and AIDS, you could have unsafe sex with someone who's infected and not get it, or you could get it. It's hard to say. I'm really hoping you don't, and that all those tests keep coming back negative. I'm sorry this had to go down at Christmas time, but maybe for a New Years resolution you now realize that it's time to be safe everytime. I know I'm not one to take advice from I've had unsafe sex, and shared needles before in IV drug use. But please be careful from here on out, I'm worried about you and I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. :hug: :smooch:

¤CharlDa¤
Dec 25th, 2006, 05:23 AM
Just to get things clear here, why is the one receiving penetration more vulnerable? Is it a more direct entry for the virus or sthing?

Mother_Marjorie
Dec 25th, 2006, 07:14 AM
You guys are awesome! :hug: Thanks for the support and kind words, it is scary but I'm not letting it ruin the holiday. I'm off work until the 3rd (woo hoo!) and there's no sense being down. :)

Yes, I will certainly get tested in about a month's time, for that will be the 3 month threshold to cross. Keeping fingers crossed...

Have a happy holiday, everyone! In spite of my low number of posts, I've been a member for many years now and visit most everyday. I'll make an effort to post more so I can get to know you all better. :D :cool:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/images/300/condoms.jpg

Mother Marjorie would like to give you one thousand condoms for Christmas!:kiss:

I would also like to remind you that regardless of the % of risk of contracting HIV being top vs bottom, that it is in the best interest of you and your partners health to wear a condom when either a top or bottom.

Why?

Chlamydia
Herpes
Syphillis
HPV
HIV
anal warts
Hepatitis A, B, C, D, etc......


...and just about any STD your partner or you have come into contact with through the chain of historical sex.

Its just plain stupid in today's world not to wear a condom when having sex. When unprotected, you are putting yourself and your partner at risk.

Mother Marjorie is not here to judge, but rather, remind you that the call you received from the health department should be a wake-up call to re-evaluate your sexual practices so you will stay healthy for years to come.

Hugs,

MM

Darop.
Dec 25th, 2006, 10:39 AM
Next time use a condom when fucking an "acquintance".