View Full Version : How to get off a speeding fine

Apr 8th, 2005, 03:22 PM
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.

It was valid.

Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card.

The driver owned the car.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.

Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!

Apr 8th, 2005, 06:06 PM
LMAO! :haha: That's great.

Apr 9th, 2005, 12:52 AM

Apr 9th, 2005, 01:51 PM

(it's too funny for people to have missed)

Mateo Mathieu
Apr 9th, 2005, 02:40 PM
I've seen that one before :p

Apr 10th, 2005, 02:56 AM
That's a great one. I'll use it next time...

Apr 10th, 2005, 10:54 AM
That's a great one. I'll use it next time...
I wouldn't try.... It might backfire :eek:

Apr 10th, 2005, 10:12 PM
Good one! :haha:

Apr 11th, 2005, 12:47 AM
HAHA! Good one.

Apr 11th, 2005, 12:51 AM

Apr 11th, 2005, 05:27 AM
:lol: I heard it before, but it's still funny.