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View Full Version : any1 like joan rivers?


jack duckworth
Jun 10th, 2004, 08:59 PM
hehe shes so great :D ...when she do live from the red carpet its fantastic...shes so funny two :wavey: :D

TimBo
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:03 PM
she is very funny. Altough sometimes she says people have on ugly outfits and I wonder, girl, who dressed u today

Helen Lawson
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:05 PM
She is ok, but I avoid her on the Red Carpet. All the really big celebrities avoid her. Her plastic surgery is good, her face does not move, but it looks natural. I have more movement in my face, but I do not look as young.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:05 PM
I can't stand her.

jack duckworth
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:13 PM
i am so in shock...i think this is the first time that barrie do not like a woman;):)

Cam'ron Giles
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:14 PM
I remember her whole routine about her friend Hiedi Abromowitz...:lol:

CondiLicious
Jun 10th, 2004, 09:15 PM
Well... seeing as she has just registered here then I better be nice about her! She is very "unique" looking... :)

Joan Rivers
Jun 10th, 2004, 10:41 PM
Hey kids, Joan's here. Can we talk?!

She is ok, but I avoid her on the Red Carpet. All the really big celebrities avoid her. Her plastic surgery is good, her face does not move, but it looks natural. I have more movement in my face, but I do not look as young.

Helen Lawson, as I live and lipo, is that you? Last time I saw you, you had more chins than the Chinese telephone directory and you were chewing the scenery in Gypsy! Ethel Merman was rolling in her grave after that performance - and it caused a 6.4 tremor on the Richter Scale. What do you mean you avoid me on the red carpet? Last time I saw you on a red carpet you were underneath Ernie Borgnine and sucking gin off an ice cube!

Kids let me tell you, Helen is the only woman in the business who never had to worry about birth control - she just kept the light on and that did the trick!

jack duckworth
Jun 10th, 2004, 10:48 PM
:haha: welcome to the board joan:)

WorldWar24
Jun 10th, 2004, 11:51 PM
:haha:

Joan rivers :spit:

you're funny! :D

peachfuzz
Jun 11th, 2004, 03:24 AM
sometimes she annoys the hell out of me...

Oh Joan's here...hi Joan

Ballbuster
Jun 11th, 2004, 03:26 AM
hehe shes so great :D ...when she do live from the red carpet its fantastic...shes so funny two :wavey: :D

She is tired, old, ugly and her jokes are boring.

Helen Lawson
Jun 11th, 2004, 12:10 PM
Hey kids, Joan's here. Can we talk?!



Helen Lawson, as I live and lipo, is that you? Last time I saw you, you had more chins than the Chinese telephone directory and you were chewing the scenery in Gypsy! Ethel Merman was rolling in her grave after that performance - and it caused a 6.4 tremor on the Richter Scale. What do you mean you avoid me on the red carpet? Last time I saw you on a red carpet you were underneath Ernie Borgnine and sucking gin off an ice cube!

Kids let me tell you, Helen is the only woman in the business who never had to worry about birth control - she just kept the light on and that did the trick!
Thanks, babe. That must be been Neely you saw with Ernie, dear. I had her do a distraction so I could sneak around you and Melissa. At least I had the good sense to keep my children out of showbiz if they had no talent.

Funny, Anne Welles called about 10 years ago. Her apartment is near mine in Manhattan. She and Lyon were "in the mood" and she did not have any birth control and wanted some advice. I sent over a TV Guide with you on the cover. Brilliant, no?

Joan Rivers
Jun 11th, 2004, 01:47 PM
Thanks, babe. That must be been Neely you saw with Ernie, dear. I had her do a distraction so I could sneak around you and Melissa. At least I had the good sense to keep my children out of showbiz if they had no talent.

Hey Helen well done for keeping your kids outta the biz (although not outta the tabloids). You worked out yet who the fathers are? That could take a while!

Funny, Anne Welles called about 10 years ago. Her apartment is near mine in Manhattan.

You mean Anne Welles is slumming it on the Lower East side too?!

Cam'ron Giles
Jun 11th, 2004, 02:19 PM
Whooo...Bitch fight....:drool:

Joan...can you do some of your Hiedie Abromowitz routine for me?

Helen Lawson
Jun 11th, 2004, 02:26 PM
Hey Helen well done for keeping your kids outta the biz (although not outta the tabloids). You worked out yet who the fathers are? That could take a while!



You mean Anne Welles is slumming it on the Lower East side too?!
Oh, really? My beloved twins turned out great, even if I did have to bribe their father to get lost after we split. Some men! I really miss the studio system, just write a check, they break his legs, and he's off my back forever and it never hits the papers. Those were the days, I tell you! And they CERTAINLY did not appear on "I'm a star, get me outta here!" I heard Mel just beat out Jackie Stallone for that last spot. Now that's an accomplishment!!!

Annie and I live on Central Park West, babe. I am in the same building as Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg.

Joanie, I hear your new beau is Australian, like lives there. So you have to fly 18 hours just to get some, is that it? I can just open the stage door and men are all over themselves trying to get me. Sure, they're all gay, but most can rustle up something for Helen Lawson.

Joan Rivers
Jun 11th, 2004, 02:47 PM
Oh, really? My beloved twins turned out great, even if I did have to bribe their father to get lost after we split. Some men! I really miss the studio system, just write a check, they break his legs, and he's off my back forever and it never hits the papers. Those were the days, I tell you! And they CERTAINLY did not appear on "I'm a star, get me outta here!" I heard Mel just beat out Jackie Stallone for that last spot. Now that's an accomplishment!!!

Hey Helen, Melissa's doing OK. And we all know where the got the name for that show - I am a Star , Get Me Outta Here'. Several high profile men shouted that phrase while having sexual intercourse with you!

I can just open the stage door and men are all over themselves trying to get me. Sure, they're all gay, but most can rustle up something for Helen Lawson.

Guys rustling something up for you Helen? Isn't that borderline necrophilia these days?

Helen Lawson
Jun 11th, 2004, 02:51 PM
Hey Helen, Melissa's doing OK. And we all know where the got the name for that show - I am a Star , Get Me Outta Here'. Several high profile men shouted that phrase while having sexual intercourse with you!



Guys rustling something up for you Helen? Isn't that borderline necrophilia these days?
At least my face can move when I am in the sack with a guy. Your face does not move, sort of like an inflatable doll. The guys still love me. I have had plastic surgery all over, if you get my drift, darling.

Cam'ron Giles
Jun 11th, 2004, 03:00 PM
Ohhhh this is good...Joan...she sent me a pm and told me that you were once gang banged on Merv Griffin's estate while Eva Gabor was out of the country...I would not take that emm lying down...:o

Helen Lawson
Jun 11th, 2004, 03:07 PM
Ohhhh this is good...Joan...she sent me a pm and told me that you were once gang banged on Merv Griffin's estate while Eva Gabor was out of the country...I would not take that emm lying down...:o
Honey, I am certain there were several gang-bangs at Merv's estate when Eva was away, but neither I nor any another woman was involved. :lol:

Joan Rivers
Jun 11th, 2004, 03:22 PM
Ohhhh this is good...Joan...she sent me a pm and told me that you were once gang banged on Merv Griffin's estate while Eva Gabor was out of the country...I would not take that emm lying down...:o)

That wasn't me! It was my friend Heidi Abromowitz. Heidi's a slut but not in Helen or Neely's league.

At least my face can move when I am in the sack with a guy. Your face does not move, sort of like an inflatable doll. The guys still love me. I have had plastic surgery all over, if you get my drift, darling.

I know you have had surgery all over Helen. You've been lifted so often your nipples are hidden among your pubic hair!

WorldWar24
Jun 11th, 2004, 04:21 PM
That wasn't me! It was my friend Heidi Abromowitz. Heidi's a slut but not in Helen or Neely's league.



I know you have had surgery all over Helen. You've been lifted so often your nipples are hidden among your pubic hair!

:haha: