PDA

View Full Version : Help With Family Issues


Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:18 AM
As many of you know, I am currently in Texas visiting my sister. Now, she is the kindess, most loving, most decent person I know. She lives in a 300,000 dollar home and her kids have the best of everything. But her kids are the most self centered, ungrateful, selfish little bastards I know and I am not exagerating! My niece, for instance, told her mother to Fuck Off and took a swing at her. Now, if it had been up to Uncle Phil, she would have had her ass kicked into next week. But it is not up to me and I have to keep my mouth shut for the sake of my sister. I am so very stressed ou that I have no idea what to do. I do love my family dearly, but this behaviour is just too much. Any suggestions?:sad:

esquímaux
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:22 AM
Yes, stop by Conroe and visit me! :p:hehehe:

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:24 AM
Yes, stop by Conroe and visit me! :p:hehehe:Is that in Texas? I am very close to where Amanda lives.

alexusjonesfan
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:42 AM
Sorry, I can't help Barrie...it's just that Uncle Phil reminded me of Fresh Prince :lol:

Maybe you should go into Dr. Phil mode and have a frank chat with your sister. My aunts have given my mom child-raising advice before...not sure how it went over though :o

Jericho
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:43 AM
its either time for bootcamp or the Simple Life 3

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:47 AM
its either time for bootcamp or the Simple Life 3Believe me, the only "Bootcamp" that they'll be getting from me is the boot on my foot meeting their asses!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:48 AM
Sorry, I can't help Barrie...it's just that Uncle Phil reminded me of Fresh Prince :lol:

Maybe you should go into Dr. Phil mode and have a frank chat with your sister. My aunts have given my mom child-raising advice before...not sure how it went over though :oActually, I am quite sure that my sister knows how I feel, and it is not her parenting skills that I question.

esquímaux
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:50 AM
Is that in Texas? I am very close to where Amanda lives.

No Timbuktu :smash: Of course Conroe is in Texas! :ras:

- L i n a -
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:51 AM
Stop worrying, and act just like the kids are.

Mooch. Mooch. Mooch.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:52 AM
Well, we are near Dallas. About 15 minutes from DFW. Where are you?

Jericho
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:52 AM
Just kidnap them and fed-ex them to a third world country then give them a cell phone so they can call you back when your ready to take them back...

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:58 AM
Stop worrying, and act just like the kids are.

Mooch. Mooch. Mooch.Sorry! I have too much respect for my sister.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 06:59 AM
Just kidnap them and fed-ex them to a third world country then give them a cell phone so they can call you back when your ready to take them back...That may be more of an option than you think......

fly guy
Jun 9th, 2004, 07:05 AM
BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM!

that's it, that's the answer!

this is fact!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 07:09 AM
BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM!

that's it, that's the answer!

this is fact!Not really. As sorely tempted as I am sometimes (and believe me I am! ) this is not the answer.

Bacardi
Jun 9th, 2004, 07:11 AM
How old are the brats?

Sometimes it fades with age, around the age of 14-19 I was a bitch to everyone in my family and acted like a snoby self centered little brat. Then that changed when I was forced to move out and get a real life and take care of myself. It might just be an age thing, teenagers now act like brats more than any other time. But I won't disagree with you it's got a lot to do with lack of respect. Just a few weeks ago when my parents took me away from BL I bitched and said a lot of shit I shouldn't have, so nobody fully outgrows it. I think it's bad and it's tough to grow up getting everything you want, it doesn't make you see the real world until you are forced into it.

fly guy
Jun 9th, 2004, 07:11 AM
Not really. As sorely tempted as I am sometimes (and believe me I am! ) this is not the answer.
it is the answer!

you know what you do? start playing with them as if you're just kidding around... get them going a lil bit... then turn it into a wrestling match and stomp the shit out of them!

6.45PM
Jun 9th, 2004, 04:32 PM
i think that the best way to deal with things is to talk to your sister about it and then talk to the kids. it does not cost anything to try. sometimes people are not aware of their behaviour until someone points it out.
i feel very bad when someone is disrespectful. whether kids or adults. i think respect can solve many things :)

Nicoleke
Jun 9th, 2004, 04:45 PM
i think that the best way to deal with things is to talk to your sister about it and then talk to the kids. it does not cost anything to try. sometimes people are not aware of their behaviour until someone points it out.
i feel very bad when someone is disrespectful. whether kids or adults. i think respect can solve many things :)
I totally agree.

Every teenagers have their " rebel period " lol. I' m sure that' s the same for your niece? With time and her erros, she will understand that she have nothing to win being bad, and she will be a nice girl again :).

KoOlMaNsEaN
Jun 9th, 2004, 04:49 PM
I think you should talk to your sister. BUT NOT to the kids because they will get even more brattier and disrespect you even more. The answer is talk to your sister about how you feel and that you would like 'em to stop being brats!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:22 PM
How old are the brats?

Sometimes it fades with age, around the age of 14-19 I was a bitch to everyone in my family and acted like a snoby self centered little brat. Then that changed when I was forced to move out and get a real life and take care of myself. It might just be an age thing, teenagers now act like brats more than any other time. But I won't disagree with you it's got a lot to do with lack of respect. Just a few weeks ago when my parents took me away from BL I bitched and said a lot of shit I shouldn't have, so nobody fully outgrows it. I think it's bad and it's tough to grow up getting everything you want, it doesn't make you see the real world until you are forced into it.19, 18 and 15. And it seems to get worse!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:23 PM
i think that the best way to deal with things is to talk to your sister about it and then talk to the kids. it does not cost anything to try. sometimes people are not aware of their behaviour until someone points it out.
i feel very bad when someone is disrespectful. whether kids or adults. i think respect can solve many things :)Judy knows how I feel and the kids are aware of their behaviour. That is the sad part:sad:

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:24 PM
I think you should talk to your sister. BUT NOT to the kids because they will get even more brattier and disrespect you even more. The answer is talk to your sister about how you feel and that you would like 'em to stop being brats!I have. The problem is not with her, it is the kiddies!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:25 PM
I totally agree.

Every teenagers have their " rebel period " lol. I' m sure that' s the same for your niece? With time and her erros, she will understand that she have nothing to win being bad, and she will be a nice girl again :).But I hope that she does not destroy herself in the process!:sad:

- L i n a -
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:29 PM
Sorry! I have too much respect for my sister.
Blah. "Respect" is one of those words I can never comprehend. :p

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:32 PM
Blah. "Respect" is one of those words I can never comprehend. :pWell, as sweet as my sister is, it is hard for me not to respect her!

Veritas
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:43 PM
As many of you know, I am currently in Texas visiting my sister. Now, she is the kindess, most loving, most decent person I know. She lives in a 300,000 dollar home and her kids have the best of everything. But her kids are the most self centered, ungrateful, selfish little bastards I know and I am not exagerating! My niece, for instance, told her mother to Fuck Off and took a swing at her. Now, if it had been up to Uncle Phil, she would have had her ass kicked into next week. But it is not up to me and I have to keep my mouth shut for the sake of my sister. I am so very stressed ou that I have no idea what to do. I do love my family dearly, but this behaviour is just too much. Any suggestions?:sad:

Backhand her across the nose. It's the best way to show her that taking a 'swing' at her mum is a no-no :p :devil:

Seriously though, if I were you, I would never keep my mouth shut when something like that happens. I don't know anybody who'd hit their parents and for her to do that is pretty dramatic. If you don't say anything, obviously, the girl will figure that you probably keep quiet when she humiliates your sister in front of you next time.

IMO, she's got no respect for her parents.

apoet29
Jun 9th, 2004, 05:49 PM
Barrie,

You need to sit down with both of them together and say your peace. I know that sounds like a real cliche, but it sounds as though this situation has deteriorated to a point where keeping your mouth shut is not an option. I firmly believe that in any type of domestic violence situation, which this situation falls under that category, then a third party needs to step in and help. It sounds to me as though your niece is going through more than the usual teenage girl problems, and perhaps that swing at her mother is a cry for help. In any case, step in and help while you still can.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:09 PM
Barrie,

You need to sit down with both of them together and say your peace. I know that sounds like a real cliche, but it sounds as though this situation has deteriorated to a point where keeping your mouth shut is not an option. I firmly believe that in any type of domestic violence situation, which this situation falls under that category, then a third party needs to step in and help. It sounds to me as though your niece is going through more than the usual teenage girl problems, and perhaps that swing at her mother is a cry for help. In any case, step in and help while you still can.What I am most afraid of here is that if I open my mouth and my niece smarts off, she just may get a backhand across the chops before I realize what I am doing. That is how angry, hurt, frustrated I am. I am seriouisly ready to blow a cork!

fly guy
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:12 PM
19, 18 and 15. And it seems to get worse!
it's too late now. just forget about it.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:13 PM
it's too late now. just forget about it.I wish it were that easy, my friend!

fly guy
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:16 PM
I wish it were that easy, my friend!
i meant, it's too late for them to change...you might aswell get used to it. or, beat the shit out of them! :devil:

actually, it's never too late for an asswhoop. :devil:

seriously though, the next time they talk to their mother like that, grab a hold of them, take them to the side...and tell them that it's disrespectful to speak to their mom like that....tell them that without her, they wouldn't have shit, so they best respect.

shit, if i ever talked to my mom like that, i'd get the beat down of my life!

fly guy
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:19 PM
or have one of their friends say something. i know that around here you're not allowed to disrespect your mom like that. if you do, you lose a ton of respect. maybe that'll help?

shap_half
Jun 9th, 2004, 08:58 PM
It really doesn't matter how old those kids are, they can't treat their own mother like that. I had been the mother of that child and treated me that way I would have given that child a good spanking. Barrie, your sister's parenting skills are in question. She may be doing something that propagates to her kids that it's ok to do that; otherwise, they wouldn't have done so. I think that you need to frank to your sister. Tell her that it pains you to see her being treated that way because you know what a kind and good person she is (actually she can be rotten and still her kids shouldn't be treating her that way because she is their mother). You really need to discuss this with your sister. That's the only way any type of resolution can be found.

*abby*
Jun 9th, 2004, 09:06 PM
u shud talk to ur sister and come up with a group of strict groundrules and then tell them if they break them they are out!u cud have like a three strike system and then seriously tell them to find a new place to live (or jst kick them out for a couple of weeks and tell them to see how they like fending for themselves) other than that the only serious solution i can think of is a boot camp type thing altho i dont see the 18 and 19 year olds doin it :confused:

im really sorry ur trip is being ruined babe :kiss:

Helen Lawson
Jun 9th, 2004, 09:50 PM
They are not your children. Unless your sister asks for advice, say nothing. If she asks, be honest. But telling a parent unsolicited about their bratty children gets you nowhere.

It was like when I went to Joan Crawford'ss for parties in the '50's and '40's. That Christina girl, her daughter, was the most prissy, spoiled brat I had ever seen in Hollywood. You would never say anything to Crawford, it is her child and her business. The girl deserved to be beaten. I found at later, I guess she was!

Infiniti2001
Jun 9th, 2004, 10:52 PM
Tell your sis, to punish them-- it works.. Take away the cellphones, the car , internet access etc. My aunt did this to my 17 year old cousin who was a lil bitch for a while. Actually , she allowed internet access, but with parental controls(aol) :lol: She wrote so many letters and emails to her parents begging for her priviledges to be reinstated. She was even calling me to talk to them on her behalf ugh. :tape:

Kart
Jun 9th, 2004, 10:57 PM
I would be tempted to give them a piece of my mind if they wound me up but would bite my tongue.

However, if one of them raised her hand to my sister (if I had one) or spoke to her the way you describe, I wouldn't stand there and allow it.

You have no right to tell someone how to raise their kids but you do have a right to step in and defend your sister when she's threatened.

God I hate kids.

Infiniti2001
Jun 9th, 2004, 11:03 PM
I would be tempted to give them a piece of my mind if they wound me up but would bite my tongue.

However, if one of them raised her hand to my sister (if I had one) or spoke to her the way you describe, I wouldn't stand there and allow it.

You have no right to tell someone how to raise their kids but you do have a right to step in and defend your sister when she's threatened.

God I hate kids.

I was with you until your last line :sad: Here I thought we were going to get married , have a house , 2.5 kids, and a dog. :sobbing:

Kart
Jun 9th, 2004, 11:08 PM
If the kids were yours I'd love them forever :hearts:.

I want a cat as well though :kiss:.

Infiniti2001
Jun 9th, 2004, 11:16 PM
If the kids were yours I'd love them forever :hearts:.

I want a cat as well though :kiss:.

So you wouldn't share your dna with me?? :lol: :rolls: :haha:

Kart
Jun 9th, 2004, 11:20 PM
So you wouldn't share your dna with me?? :lol: :rolls: :haha:
I would gladly :hearts:.

BritneySpearsIsHot
Jun 9th, 2004, 11:44 PM
As many of you know, I am currently in Texas visiting my sister. Now, she is the kindess, most loving, most decent person I know. She lives in a 300,000 dollar home and her kids have the best of everything. But her kids are the most self centered, ungrateful, selfish little bastards I know and I am not exagerating! My niece, for instance, told her mother to Fuck Off and took a swing at her. Now, if it had been up to Uncle Phil, she would have had her ass kicked into next week. But it is not up to me and I have to keep my mouth shut for the sake of my sister. I am so very stressed ou that I have no idea what to do. I do love my family dearly, but this behaviour is just too much. Any suggestions?:sad:
Sorry to hear Barrie. You really should get your sister to stand up to them. Remove all their priveledges (and remember they are not rights) such as TV, Internet, anything.

You gotta be hard, or they'll never learn and they'll go through life this way and get into bigger trouble

Jetta
Jun 10th, 2004, 01:12 AM
hmm..i wonder if the child was spoiled as a kid...

Violence isn't the answer....maybe get the cops involved just to scare the niece (esp. with the hitting....could be assault)

The niece isn't scared and doesn't think anything bad will happen to her if she behaves in the present way since (I assume) her mother is lenient towards her.

Celeste
Jun 10th, 2004, 01:41 AM
Hey, Barrie-babe! Too bad you don't have Amanda, Jennifer, Angelina, or some other hot babe to be there with you, you wouldn't notice all this tyranny! My advice, leave it alone. Your sister knows they are terrible. If she wants your advice or assistance, she will ask. I learned a long time ago, don't interfere with someone and their kids. It never works.

My sister, as everyone well knows, is a total loser/trashbag. She has this dreadful daughter who once in my presence, actually hit my sister. My sister told her to brush her hair before we left for a dinner (Golden Corral, lol) and the little bitch refused, so my sister tried to brush her hair for her, and the girl grabbed the brush and hit my sister across the face. I dressed down the girl and said if I had pulled that shit on our harpie/tramp mother, she would have beat the shit out of me or had her boyfriend of the day do it, and to respect her mother. And she would have, too, my mother was not nice and no motherly instincts. The reaction? My sister told me, in front of the little bitch, that I had no right to interfere and how dare I dress down her or her little bitch daughter. That's gratitude! So now my sister is pissed at me, and so is that little bitch. My advice, babe, stay out of it. I'm sure your sister is not the loser mine is, but just ignore it.

We went to the Golden Corral that night and that little slut did brush her hair before she went.

thecatinthehat
Jun 10th, 2004, 01:45 AM
As many of you know, I am currently in Texas visiting my sister. Now, she is the kindess, most loving, most decent person I know. She lives in a 300,000 dollar home and her kids have the best of everything. But her kids are the most self centered, ungrateful, selfish little bastards I know and I am not exagerating! My niece, for instance, told her mother to Fuck Off and took a swing at her. Now, if it had been up to Uncle Phil, she would have had her ass kicked into next week. But it is not up to me and I have to keep my mouth shut for the sake of my sister. I am so very stressed ou that I have no idea what to do. I do love my family dearly, but this behaviour is just too much. Any suggestions?:sad:

depends what kind of person your sister is...but I would lay low and mind my own business. I went through a situation much like this one and not keeping my mouth shut...was...not very helpful

Barrie_Dude
Jun 10th, 2004, 04:35 AM
Hey, Barrie-babe! Too bad you don't have Amanda, Jennifer, Angelina, or some other hot babe to be there with you, you wouldn't notice all this tyranny! My advice, leave it alone. Your sister knows they are terrible. If she wants your advice or assistance, she will ask. I learned a long time ago, don't interfere with someone and their kids. It never works.

My sister, as everyone well knows, is a total loser/trashbag. She has this dreadful daughter who once in my presence, actually hit my sister. My sister told her to brush her hair before we left for a dinner (Golden Corral, lol) and the little bitch refused, so my sister tried to brush her hair for her, and the girl grabbed the brush and hit my sister across the face. I dressed down the girl and said if I had pulled that shit on our harpie/tramp mother, she would have beat the shit out of me or had her boyfriend of the day do it, and to respect her mother. And she would have, too, my mother was not nice and no motherly instincts. The reaction? My sister told me, in front of the little bitch, that I had no right to interfere and how dare I dress down her or her little bitch daughter. That's gratitude! So now my sister is pissed at me, and so is that little bitch. My advice, babe, stay out of it. I'm sure your sister is not the loser mine is, but just ignore it.

We went to the Golden Corral that night and that little slut did brush her hair before she went.Well, that is part of the reason I keep my trap shut. Also, if I ever lit into these kids, it would not be pretty! I'd show them what a tounge lashing is and if they ever dared spoke to me the way they spoke to their Mom, I'd knock them into next week! And, b4 I get in trouble here, I would never hit them hard enough to do any damage, just hard enough to get their attention and scare the hell out of them. Sorry, but that is the way I was raised!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 10th, 2004, 04:37 AM
Hey, Barrie-babe! Too bad you don't have Amanda, Jennifer, Angelina, or some other hot babe to be there with you, you wouldn't notice all this tyranny! My advice, leave it alone. Your sister knows they are terrible. If she wants your advice or assistance, she will ask. I learned a long time ago, don't interfere with someone and their kids. It never works.

My sister, as everyone well knows, is a total loser/trashbag. She has this dreadful daughter who once in my presence, actually hit my sister. My sister told her to brush her hair before we left for a dinner (Golden Corral, lol) and the little bitch refused, so my sister tried to brush her hair for her, and the girl grabbed the brush and hit my sister across the face. I dressed down the girl and said if I had pulled that shit on our harpie/tramp mother, she would have beat the shit out of me or had her boyfriend of the day do it, and to respect her mother. And she would have, too, my mother was not nice and no motherly instincts. The reaction? My sister told me, in front of the little bitch, that I had no right to interfere and how dare I dress down her or her little bitch daughter. That's gratitude! So now my sister is pissed at me, and so is that little bitch. My advice, babe, stay out of it. I'm sure your sister is not the loser mine is, but just ignore it.

We went to the Golden Corral that night and that little slut did brush her hair before she went.Of course, if it were up to me, your niece may have wound up eatin' that comb!

Barrie_Dude
Jun 10th, 2004, 04:39 AM
depends what kind of person your sister is...but I would lay low and mind my own business. I went through a situation much like this one and not keeping my mouth shut...was...not very helpfulMy sister is a wonderful person. In fact, let me suggest that you check out http://www.stonegateseniorcare.com If you click on "About Us" and scroll down to the "Director of Accounting and Finacial Reporting", that is my sister!

bw2082
Jun 10th, 2004, 04:41 AM
you're a guest in here house. It's not your place to tell her how to raise her children unless she asks you. Grit your teeth and smile or get out if it bothers you so much.

Barrie_Dude
Jun 10th, 2004, 04:46 AM
Well, I have managed so far. And I am home to Toronto on Sunday

Joan Rivers
Jun 11th, 2004, 12:20 AM
I hope you work it out. I had family issues - I told my mother-in-law 'My house is your house'. She said 'Get the hell off my property!'