Re: A balanced response to the Serena faux pas
This is the same thing that my doubles partner says. My response is a little lofty: Nothing that anyone does should ever lead to rape. And I understand that we don't live in a perfect world, and there are monsters out there who would take advantage of your vulnerability. And I think that any conversation about this after prosecution needs to underscore that while nothing you could ever do should lead to getting sexually assaulted that there are perverts out there who will use your poor judgment against you. And that's not what Serena said. I think her wording emphasized the victim's errors, and I think that that's what was really difficult to understand. I don't remember where I read this, but there was an article where Serena was quote as saying, "unless they put something in her drink, then that's another story." To me, I understood that as her saying that because they didn't put something in the victim's drink that she was somehow in some way responsible.
I'm not trying to vilify Serena, I just think that we need to very careful with how we discuss not just rape culture but the entire world that victims of abuse live in.
i think some people fear that any dialogue at all about what rape victims should have done differently opens the door to victim blaming and detracts from the "rape is wrong no matter what" message. there's a lot of validity to that. we as a society need to completely eliminate the mentality where a boy can see a girl passed out and think "she's asking for it".
BUT teenage girls need to use this incident as a cautionary tale. don't get wasted at parties, don't walk alone in sketchy neighbourhoods, don't get into a stranger's car, etc. shutting down that discussion altogether is pretty irresponsible towards future potential victims.