The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man - TennisForum.com
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #1 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 01:38 PM Thread Starter
Senior Member
 
Kunal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Amsterdam
Posts: 12,869
                     
The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

The questions are:

What are you thinking about?
Do you love me?
Do I look fat?
Do you think she is prettier than me?
What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

Question # 1: What are you thinking about?

The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you." This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:

Baseball.
Football.
How fat you are.
How much prettier she is than you.
How I would spend the insurance money if you died.
(Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!")

Question # 2: Do you love me?

The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include:

I suppose so.
Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
That depends on what you mean by love.
Does it matter?
Who, me?
Question # 3: Do I look fat?

The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are:

Compared to what?
I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
A little extra weight looks good on you.
I've seen fatter.
Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me? Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:

Yes, but you have a better personality
Not prettier, but definitely thinner
Not as pretty as you, when you were her age
Define 'pretty'
Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Question #5: What would you do if I died?

A definite no-win question. (The real answer, or course, is "Buy a Corvette.")

No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:

She....Would you get married again?
He.....Definitely not!
She....Why not - don't you like being married?
He.....Of course I do.
She....Then why wouldn't you remarry?
He.....Okay, I'd get married again.
She....You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
He.....Yes, I would.
She....Would you sleep with her in our bed?
He.....Where else would we sleep?
She....Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
He.....That would seem like the proper thing to do.
She....And would you let her use my golf clubs?
He.....She can't use them; she's left-handed.

I'm not young enough to know everything.
Kunal is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 03:51 PM
Senior Member
 
"Sluggy"'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 6,784
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

oh i gotta read this shit.. Im not sure i like the answers but i understand the questions.
"Sluggy" is offline  
post #3 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 04:01 PM
Worshipping the bangs
 
miffedmax's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Larsson's Player Forum
Posts: 52,044
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

No, no, no. The worst question a woman can ask is "Is it in yet?"

Max
Pass the duct tape and super glue. Lena's done broke my heart one last time.
Onward my LOB! Lena (ret.) Vika Vee TOB Caro Alexa Sabs Wicky Lesia Vania BMS Ekat Andi H. Jo-La Lena V KP2 Lil Bit Kiki Mini Mak Baby Veronika
"I read on the internet that there is something chipmunky about me :-)"--Andrea H.[/SIZE]
Jo-La Queen of Norrland and Bastad
Elena Viatcheslavovna Dementieva--Eternal Goddess of the Divine Bangs
miffedmax is offline  
post #4 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 04:03 PM
country flag LDF
Senior Member
 
LDF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: England
Posts: 9,952
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by miffedmax View Post
No, no, no. The worst question a woman can ask is "Is it in yet?"

◄◄ Maria Sharapova ►►
Career Grand Slam.

Serena WilliamsJelena Jankovic

Hantuchova~Watson~Robson~Mladenovic~Muguruza
LDF is offline  
post #5 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 04:33 PM
Senior Member
 
venus_rulez's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 5,346
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Very funny thread

RIDE OR DIE! Down for Venus Williams



[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]


I GOT 5 ON IT!!!!! VENUS WILLIAMS 5 TIME WIMBLEDON CHAMPION!!!!!
venus_rulez is offline  
post #6 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 04:47 PM
The hottest straight, goth rocker on the board
Admin Emeritus
 
The Crow's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Belgium
Posts: 33,176
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kunal View Post
Question # 3: Do I look fat?
I've seen fatter.

...

She....And would you let her use my golf clubs?
He.....She can't use them; she's left-handed.

If only I was sure that my head on the door was a dream
The Crow is offline  
post #7 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 06:27 PM
Her Grace, The Duchess of Williamsburg
 
Denise4925's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Basking in Serena's Glory
Posts: 30,854
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

No, the worst question a woman could ask a man. "Is that all?"
Denise4925 is offline  
post #8 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 07:08 PM
Senior Member
 
skanky~skanketta's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Not paradise thats fo sho
Posts: 15,453
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Denise4925 View Post
No, the worst question a woman could ask a man. "Is that all?"
oh snap!


skanky~skanketta is offline  
post #9 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 07:12 PM
Senior Member
 
Nicjac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: TBAA meeting
Posts: 4,243
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by miffedmax View Post
No, no, no. The worst question a woman can ask is "Is it in yet?"
Yep, that is pretty devastating. Speaking from a woman's perspective
Nicjac is offline  
post #10 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 10:51 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 2,108
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kunal View Post
The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Question # 2: Do you love me?

I suppose so.

Question # 3: Do I look fat?

Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me? Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:

Not as pretty as you, when you were her age
Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question #5: What would you do if I died?

She....And would you let her use my golf clubs?
He.....She can't use them; she's left-handed.
Dunlop1 is offline  
post #11 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 11:13 PM
Senior Member
 
Number19's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,405
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

What are you thinking about? You and how beautiful you are and how I can't believe you're with me.
Do you love me? Of course, baby. (never use "yes," or the actually word 'love')
Do I look fat? You're as beautiful as the day I met you.
Do you think she is prettier than me? Who? Oh. pfft No.
What would you do if I died? A piece of me would die. I don't know how I would continue without you.


This how you answer these questions.

And of course they are all lies.

Dominika Cibulková · Elena Vesnina
Garbińe Muguruza · Sabine Lisicki · Angelique Kerber · Andrea Petković
Kristýna Plíšková · Gabriela Dabrowski · Jarmila Wolfe · Stefanie Vögele · Lauren Davis · Aleksandra Krunić · Karolina Plíšková
Number19 is offline  
post #12 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 11:32 PM Thread Starter
Senior Member
 
Kunal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Amsterdam
Posts: 12,869
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Number19 View Post
What are you thinking about? You and how beautiful you are and how I can't believe you're with me.
Do you love me? Of course, baby. (never use "yes," or the actually word 'love')
Do I look fat? You're as beautiful as the day I met you.
Do you think she is prettier than me? Who? Oh. pfft No.
What would you do if I died? A piece of me would die. I don't know how I would continue without you.


This how you answer these questions.

And of course they are all lies.

those are really good answers.....
hopefully when guys say that they will mean it

I'm not young enough to know everything.
Kunal is offline  
post #13 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 11:43 PM
Her Grace, The Duchess of Williamsburg
 
Denise4925's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Basking in Serena's Glory
Posts: 30,854
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Number19 View Post
What are you thinking about? You and how beautiful you are and how I can't believe you're with me.
Do you love me? Of course, baby. (never use "yes," or the actually word 'love')
Do I look fat? You're as beautiful as the day I met you.
Do you think she is prettier than me? Who? Oh. pfft No.
What would you do if I died? A piece of me would die. I don't know how I would continue without you.


This how you answer these questions.

And of course they are all lies.
No different from the lies women tell men:

Did you come? Did I ever, Big Daddy. Couldn't you tell?!!
Was it good? You're the best I've ever had, babe.
Denise4925 is offline  
post #14 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 15th, 2006, 11:48 PM
Senior Member
 
MikeJones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 924
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

1)Another girl is NEVER prettier than your girl

2)Why is it hard to say you love her?

3)Ive told a few girlfriends they have to lose some weight. Not all girls take offense to that

MARTINA + ANNA


DOUBLES PARTNERS FORE-EVER
...........................
Watch out for TAMIRA PASZEK
She's coming soon to a TOP 10 NEAR YOU! -said by me, 1-30-2007
MikeJones is offline  
post #15 of 24 (permalink) Old Nov 16th, 2006, 12:07 AM
NeverWoz
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Posts: 26,325
                     
Re: The 5 Toughest Questions a Woman Can Ask a Man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Denise4925 View Post
No different from the lies women tell men:

Did you come? Did I ever, Big Daddy. Couldn't you tell?!!
Was it good? You're the best I've ever had, babe.


ROTF. I knew there was something fake about when they've said that.
Ryan is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the TennisForum.com forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

Registration Image

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome