Forget Barbie...here it comes TALKING PREGNANT TRAILER TRASH DOLL!
We're gonna come right out and say it... Barbie's so perfect it makes us sick. She's so pretty and so popular and so... so everything that we're not. Barbie makes us feel like pathetic losers. What we really crave is a doll that makes us feel SUPERIOR, for god's sake.
And now we've found one
This astounding doll captures a world that Barbie has never seen. She wears a leather jacket and halter top, sports a head of bleached-blonde hair complete with curlers, and has a cigarette dangling from her mouth.
Oh, and she's pregnant, too. So even if Barbie has never met her, there's a chance that Ken did.
And she talks, too! When you press her bellybutton, the Trailer Trash Doll will say things like "Pour me a double, I'm drinkin' for two." and "Bubba Jr., get off your sister!"
She may not be well-heeled, but she's very well-made. She comes in the box as shown, and even includes a little baby doll from a previous pregnancy.
So you can join Barbie in her Dream House if you want. We'll be hanging out with the Trailer Trash on the other side of the tracks.
But I, being poor, have only my dreams
I have spread my dreams under your feet
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams