Williams, Belgians to Form Seperate Tour - TennisForum.com
 
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 2nd, 2003, 11:25 PM Thread Starter
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Williams, Belgians to Form Seperate Tour

As a response to the new mandatory Tier I rule, Venus and Serena Williams, Kim Clijsters and Justine Henin=Hardenne have opted to leave the WTA, and start their own 'SuperStars' pro tennis tour. They'll pay at the majors, and the two weeks before each Slam event, would hold a round robin tournament between the four, with the two best records facing each other for $500,000 each week.

Spots for four other players are being considered, with Martina hingis chief among them.

Noted Hingis "it's would be a LOT less wear and tear on my ankles if I only played four months a year."

Other notables under consideration include Lindsay Davenport ("Gee, just two weeks and play the Slams? Call me after I have my first two kids. I could do this."), Amelie Mauresmo, Jennifer Capriati and Mary Pierce, if she's the Mary Pierce who won RG.

"We're practical". said Serena Williams, caught between takes of her next movie. "We want Anna, if she can just get her game together. We'd take over sports. We wouldn't just be stars. We'd be THE stars."

Said Jennifer Capriati as she went over the sales figures for her star spangled bodysuit. "They can take their mandatory Tier I's and f*ck themselves. We were gonna finance it ourselves, but Serena made thre phone calls and had ten million dollars lined up. Sh*t. The girl should give lessons."

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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 12:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Volcana
As a response to the new mandatory Tier I rule, Venus and Serena Williams, Kim Clijsters and Justine Henin=Hardenne have opted to leave the WTA, and start their own 'SuperStars' pro tennis tour. They'll pay at the majors, and the two weeks before each Slam event, would hold a round robin tournament between the four, with the two best records facing each other for $500,000 each week.

Spots for four other players are being considered, with Martina hingis chief among them.

Noted Hingis "it's would be a LOT less wear and tear on my ankles if I only played four months a year."

Other notables under consideration include Lindsay Davenport ("Gee, just two weeks and play the Slams? Call me after I have my first two kids. I could do this."), Amelie Mauresmo, Jennifer Capriati and Mary Pierce, if she's the Mary Pierce who won RG.

"We're practical". said Serena Williams, caught between takes of her next movie. "We want Anna, if she can just get her game together. We'd take over sports. We wouldn't just be stars. We'd be THE stars."

Said Jennifer Capriati as she went over the sales figures for her star spangled bodysuit. "They can take their mandatory Tier I's and f*ck themselves. We were gonna finance it ourselves, but Serena made thre phone calls and had ten million dollars lined up. Sh*t. The girl should give lessons."

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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 12:37 AM
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 12:40 AM
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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 01:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Volcana
As a response to the new mandatory Tier I rule, Venus and Serena Williams, Kim Clijsters and Justine Henin=Hardenne have opted to leave the WTA, and start their own 'SuperStars' pro tennis tour. They'll pay at the majors, and the two weeks before each Slam event, would hold a round robin tournament between the four, with the two best records facing each other for $500,000 each week.

Spots for four other players are being considered, with Martina hingis chief among them.

Noted Hingis "it's would be a LOT less wear and tear on my ankles if I only played four months a year."

Other notables under consideration include Lindsay Davenport ("Gee, just two weeks and play the Slams? Call me after I have my first two kids. I could do this."), Amelie Mauresmo, Jennifer Capriati and Mary Pierce, if she's the Mary Pierce who won RG.

"We're practical". said Serena Williams, caught between takes of her next movie. "We want Anna, if she can just get her game together. We'd take over sports. We wouldn't just be stars. We'd be THE stars."

Said Jennifer Capriati as she went over the sales figures for her star spangled bodysuit. "They can take their mandatory Tier I's and f*ck themselves. We were gonna finance it ourselves, but Serena made thre phone calls and had ten million dollars lined up. Sh*t. The girl should give lessons."
there's a protocol that should be observed at all times when posting troll stories

#1 ALWAYS post a link with yuor troll article, even if it's a fake link or a disguised link that leads to an unrelated news story or porn site whatever

#2 ALWAYS spell cuss words like Shit, Fuck, Dickass and so on in full. Writing Sh*t, Fu*k, Di*ka*s and so forth is very unprofessional

#3 ALWAYS listen to Hip Hop muzic when writing yuor troll. The more sexist the better. East Coast rap is generally the more sexist so go for that. This will give yuor writing style an extra edge

that is all

- Car Key Boi
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 01:16 AM
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 01:38 PM Thread Starter
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hey, howe about a 'Blonde Russian' tour?

Sharpova, Zvonareva, Bovina and Dementieva could tour various coastal locations. Playing in bikinis!

Proud to be an American
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 01:52 PM
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ROTF, Volcana that was great. A tour with only Venus, SErena, Henin, Kim, Hingis, Lindsay, Jennifer, and Amelie/Anna/Mary. They'd have so many sponsors and TV Deals it wouldn't be funny.
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 07:19 PM
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old Oct 3rd, 2003, 08:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Volcana
hey, howe about a 'Blonde Russian' tour?

Sharpova, Zvonareva, Bovina and Dementieva could tour various coastal locations. Playing in bikinis!
yes baby! that's more like it, blonde chicks in bikinis! FUCK THE ROCK ON!

i told yuo listening to sexist Hip Hop would improve yuor style

Volcana, the Car Key Boi salutes YUO!
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