Worshipping the bangs
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Larsson's Player Forum
Re: Halloween Confrontation VIII
THE WOMEN HEAD INTO THE TENT HOUSING THE WORLD’S OLDEST VIRGIN.
NOT SURPRISINGLY, LENA D LIES ON A BED, THUMB IN MOUTH, GENTLY SNORING.
If we just sneak out without waking her…
We might survive this year…
BUT IT’S TOO LATE! THE SLEEPING LEAN STIRS.
Mommy Vera, is that you? Are you coming to bed now?
I thought she was married—shouldn’t she waiting for her husband?
Have you ever heard of Lena D? Did you read the sign?
I’m a regular peanut butter legs compared to her. Although I must point out I’m allergic to peanuts. I ate one once and …
LENA LOOKING AROUND, SECRETIVELY WIPING THUMB ON BLANKY:
Why how nice! Every one has come back to visit me for my birthday! Is it a surprise party? Once when I was a little girl, Mommy Vera gave a me a birthday surprise. As soon as I got up she hit me in the face with a 2x4!
What the hell kind of birthday surprise is that?
It was a complete surprise! I never expected to hit in the face like that on my birthday. And like Mommy Vera said, it was so nice when it stopped hurting. Are we going to have an adventure? When I was a little girl Mommy Vera used to take me on adventures all the time! She would take me to Red Square with a sign around my neck that said “I take candy from strangers.” Then she would run away as fast as she could and I had to find my way home as best I could on my own. Sometimes it took me days and days. I haven’t done an adventure since the last time she did that to me.
When was that?
At the Museum of Islamic Arts in Doha in 2010.
We should probably kill her to avoid trouble later…but…but…
I know. She looks at you and you just kind of want to scratch behind her ears or something. I actually tried to throw that Wimby semi in ’08 for her. But she was just so…Lena.
SHOUTS AND SCREAMS COME FROM OUTSIDE THE VIRGIN TENT. ALL THE WOMEN RUN OUT, INCLUDING LENA IN HER BUNNY JAMMIES.
THE FEDERER TWINS RUN BY, TEARS STREAMING DOWN THEIR FACES.
VIKA AND NINA, DRESSED IN MATCHING SCHOOL GIRL UNIFORMS COME AROUND THE CORNER, EATING SNICKERS AND DRINKING COKES.
Like taking candy from a baby.
Like beating up a ball kid.
Like taking the #1 ranking from a Dane.
Like…oh. Hello, girls.
We cannot believe you two! Stealing candy from sweet little babies like that!
VIKA (LOOKING VAGUELY GUILTY)
We were trick-or-treating.
…when you could have delcious, Sugarpova’s for trick or treat.
JUST THEN, A PEDICAB ARRIVES, DRIVEN BY A HUFFING AND PUFFING ZHENG. OUT STEP LI AND ANA.
I know I’m going to regret asking this, but what’s with the pedicab?
Well, I had a VIP pass to the amusement park.
It’s a Mercedes pedicab. It seems there were actually some performance clauses in my contract that tie into my getting things like, you know, engines, a front end, power steering…
Apparently my contract with Chinese Tennis Federation has some performance clauses in the fine print, too.
Well, here we are, all at this amusement park. I want to go on some rides!
TO BE CONTINUED…
Pass the duct tape and super glue. Lena's done broke my heart one last time.
Onward my LOB! Lena (ret.) Vika Vee Caro Alexa Sabs Wicky Lesia Vania BMS Ekat Andi H. Jo-La Lena V KP2 Lil Bit Kiki Mini Mak Baby Veronika Lucie Cornelia
V Squad, The LOB Elite: Vika, Venus and the Mad Viking of Norrland
Jo-La Duchess of Norrland and Bastad
Elena Viatcheslavovna Dementieva--Eternal Goddess of the Divine Bangs