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post #1 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 08:41 AM Thread Starter
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Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

Elena Dementieva Must Cut The Parental Cord


By Franklin L. Johnson

(March 27, 2010) The highly-anticipated rematch between Justine Henin and Elena Dementieva failed to live up to the pre-match hype in Miami last night.

Henin displayed too much game and too much guile to be troubled by Dementieva and dispatched the fifth seed 6-3, 6-2 at the Sony Ericsson Open.

Dementieva has made solid strides in improving her serve and her game, but if she is to take the next step and break through to win her first major she must show some emotional growth on the court.



If you watched the match last night then you saw Dementieva making eye contact with her mother and coach, Vera, after nearly every point.

I think this constant eye contact and emotional give-and-take hurts her overall concentration.

Dementieva tends to be too dependent on her mother's approval and empathy. The love shared between them is extraordinary, but her mom has to do what all parents need to do. She has to let her daughter go and grow up.

Elena is a fighter of the highest degree: if you saw her Wimbledon match against Serena Williams last summer or her win over Serena in Sydney in January then you understand what I mean when I praise her fighting spirit.

The reality is Dementieva won't be able to improve her capacity to play and win close matches until she cuts the mama-daughter umbilical cord. I'm sorry to say it, but it's the truth.

Mr. Williams slowly but deliberately moved out of the lime light to allow Venus and Serena to stand on their own two feet. It was a transition which was almost imperceptible, unless you followed the Williams family exploits on a daily basis. If you notice now, Oracene Price, Venus and Serena's mother, nearly always wears sunglasses during her daughter's (day) matches as if sending a subtle signal that they need to look inside themselves for solutions rather than staring at her.

The sisters are problem solvers on court.

A parent has to gauge when it's the right time to recede and permit a child to blossom properly.

Personally, I thought Yuri Sharapov held onto the parental reigns with Maria Sharapova a tad too long which, I believe, may have contributed to her over-playing which in turn contributed to her shoulder problems.

This is a very sensitive issue and hard to deal with. The best players are the ones who learn at the earliest possible stage to fight their battles for themselves.

It's time Dementieva learned this too.

Franklin L. Johnson is a Tennis Now contributing writer and avid tennis player based in New York. He has covered professional tennis for three decades.

Click here: Elena Dementieva Must Cut The Parental Cord
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post #2 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 08:49 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

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Originally Posted by Tech1 View Post
Elena Dementieva Must Cut The Parental Cord


By Franklin L. Johnson

(March 27, 2010) The highly-anticipated rematch between Justine Henin and Elena Dementieva failed to live up to the pre-match hype in Miami last night.

Henin displayed too much game and too much guile to be troubled by Dementieva and dispatched the fifth seed 6-3, 6-2 at the Sony Ericsson Open.

Dementieva has made solid strides in improving her serve and her game, but if she is to take the next step and break through to win her first major she must show some emotional growth on the court.



If you watched the match last night then you saw Dementieva making eye contact with her mother and coach, Vera, after nearly every point.

I think this constant eye contact and emotional give-and-take hurts her overall concentration.

Dementieva tends to be too dependent on her mother's approval and empathy. The love shared between them is extraordinary, but her mom has to do what all parents need to do. She has to let her daughter go and grow up.

Elena is a fighter of the highest degree: if you saw her Wimbledon match against Serena Williams last summer or her win over Serena in Sydney in January then you understand what I mean when I praise her fighting spirit.

The reality is Dementieva won't be able to improve her capacity to play and win close matches until she cuts the mama-daughter umbilical cord. I'm sorry to say it, but it's the truth.

Mr. Williams slowly but deliberately moved out of the lime light to allow Venus and Serena to stand on their own two feet. It was a transition which was almost imperceptible, unless you followed the Williams family exploits on a daily basis. If you notice now, Oracene Price, Venus and Serena's mother, nearly always wears sunglasses during her daughter's (day) matches as if sending a subtle signal that they need to look inside themselves for solutions rather than staring at her.

The sisters are problem solvers on court.

A parent has to gauge when it's the right time to recede and permit a child to blossom properly.

Personally, I thought Yuri Sharapov held onto the parental reigns with Maria Sharapova a tad too long which, I believe, may have contributed to her over-playing which in turn contributed to her shoulder problems.

This is a very sensitive issue and hard to deal with. The best players are the ones who learn at the earliest possible stage to fight their battles for themselves.

It's time Dementieva learned this too.

Franklin L. Johnson is a Tennis Now contributing writer and avid tennis player based in New York. He has covered professional tennis for three decades.

Click here: Elena Dementieva Must Cut The Parental Cord
Elena is turning 29 this year...

If she hasn't learnt how to think independently by now in her career, I fear it may be too late.

Anyway, I agree with the article when it comes to emotional growth and learning how to problem solve on your own..., but as long as Vera isn't coaching from the sideline and is just giving support, I don't see too much wrong with it.

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post #3 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 09:04 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

If it we're earlier in her career, I'd say cut the cord. Now I just dont really think it matters too much.

And here you are, a black unicorn.
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post #4 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 09:10 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

Oh, what do you call Justine and Carlos then? Does she need to grow up to?

I don't think you can win or lose matches just by looking at your parent/coach. You don't get to be a top 10 player without being able to think for yourself on court.

And I doubt Oracene is wearing sunglasses to send a message to Venus or Serena. Wasn't it Serena who said she deliberately doesn't look over anyway?

Lena's problems aren't looking over at her mother all the time, right now it's her serve. Maybe she should work on that first hmmm....
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post #5 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 09:18 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

Classic over the top reaction from a sports pundits/writer/journo, whatever they call themselves. They can deduct EVERYTHING there is to know about ANYTHING from just ONE match.

Here we have one of the most successful WTA players over the last decade and now in the twilight of her career, its time to cut the ties with her mother?!?!

I rest my case. Elena
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post #6 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 09:26 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

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Classic over the top reaction from a sports pundits/writer/journo, whatever they call themselves. They can deduct EVERYTHING there is to know about ANYTHING from just ONE match.

Here we have one of the most successful WTA players over the last decade and now in the twilight of her career, its time to cut the ties with her mother?!?!

I rest my case. Elena
Exactly. I doubt cutting her ties with her mother is going to make her any more successful. Perhaps it was the strong bond and support system she had that made her so successful.
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post #7 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 09:52 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord




Last edited by samsam4087; Mar 28th, 2010 at 01:48 PM.
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post #8 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 10:00 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

The bias of this article reflect the typical American point of view. Why is the Williams family used as the measure of independence/autonomy? Not every culture accepts and confirms to individualism like America. Elena is Russian and her culture emphasize connection to culture, family, and the like.. It is so disrespectful to Elena and her culture.

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post #9 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 10:01 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

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Thank you.

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post #10 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 10:07 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

I said this years ago, but now it is too late.

Vassilissa is my girl............
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post #11 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 10:30 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

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The bias of this article reflect the typical American point of view. Why is the Williams family used as the measure of independence/autonomy? Not every culture accepts and confirms to individualism like America. Elena is Russian and her culture emphasize connection to culture, family, and the like.. It is so disrespectful to Elena and her culture.
...But the Williamses are clearly a tight knit clan. They're hardly mainstream America for one thing, and close knit families are hardly 'unique' to Russian culture. Oracene Price travels just about everywhere with them, as does Richard with his wife Lakeisha (save for Australia). Their other sisters are often at their matches to cheer them on, and if one sister falls early, more often than not, the other sister will be in stands cheering. They always play doubles together... and the press is still confounded by the fact that Venus isn't resentful or jealous of Serena and clearly has a "Team Williams" mentality whenever either one of them wins. You'll rarely see either of them play a match where there isn't a family member present. So what in any of this screams "ruthless American individualism"?

Yes, Americans may buy into 'rugged indivdualism' but the Williams family aren't the best example of how that ethos works.

If anything, they've shown that it is possible to come from a very close-knit family who supports you and still be your own person on court and work your way through problems - or in other words it doesn't have to be either/or - one can do and be both. If Elena is failing to think on court and makes the same errors, then her close bond with her mother might not necessarily be the problem here. There could be other reasons behind it.

But it depends on the nature of the bond. Is it a close, but healthy bond or a co-dependent one? If it's the former, then the journalist needs to start looking towards other causes/sources. If it's latter than the criticism *might* be valid. But I don't know enough about Elena to say which it is, either way.
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post #12 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 10:31 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

too late
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post #13 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 11:45 AM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

may well blame her dog too but who knows. the match is not shown
talking about if sb watched the match.

LENA D. FOREVER
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post #14 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 12:05 PM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

Nah I think the love they share as mother and daughter is much more important than increasing chances to win a slam. Lena D won the gold medal. I hope she wins a slam, but the sky won't fall if she doesn't.

And if your life were gold, how long do you think you'd stay living?
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post #15 of 47 (permalink) Old Mar 28th, 2010, 12:22 PM
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Re: Dementieva Must Cut the Parental Cord

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Nah I think the love they share as mother and daughter is much more important than increasing chances to win a slam. Lena D won the gold medal. I hope she wins a slam, but the sky won't fall if she doesn't.
I tend to agree... If she doesn´t win one i´m not gonna be sad about it. She´s had an amazing career. Besides, if vera isn´t there when elena wins a slam it just wouldn´t be the same.

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Elena, thank you for all the joy you gave me, you will always remain in my mind.
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