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post #1 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 06:50 PM Thread Starter
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Cool Last Flight Out of Australia

I saw miffedmax do this so I try



Elena Dementieva (in flight attendent uniform) and Vera Dementieva (in pilot uniform) walk onto the plane.

Elena: Ma, why do we have to keep do this job?

Vera: Well Elena, what we going to eat if we don't do this job? Your prize money from Mini Mouse tournaments like Sydney is not enuf to support us Now be a good girl and make announcement for boarding.

Vera returns to front of airpline, to drive plane


Elena: Attention passengers. Dementieva Airlines flight 55 is now reading for boarding.



The first passenger to arrive on plane is Justine and Carlos. Elena looks at their board pass.

Elena: Hello Mr. and Mrs. Henin

Justine: Excuse me. Just because I pay for his ticket does not mean we are married. Now show us our seats.

Elena: I see. Your assigned seats are 1A and 1Z ... you don't want sit together?

Carlos: No, we always maintain space between us. So when we talk to each other Justine read my lips from far away. It is practice for her to do the same thing in tennis match.

Justine sit down in 1A and Carlos sit in 1Z.

Justine (from across the pane): Carlos, so glad I defeat this Mug in Round 2.

Carlos (quietly): It never in doubt.




The next passenger to enter the plane is Maria Sharapova with Dolce.

Elena: Miss Sharapova, your assigned seat is 1C.

Maria: There better be extra seats on this flight today. I am putting Dolce on her own seat.

Elena: But I am sorry, this is full flight.

Maria gives Elena mean stare.

Maria: Just remember. I am the queen of the Russians.

Elena looks scared. Maria sits down in 1C, and puts Dolce in 1B (between her and Justine in 1A). She stares ahead ignores Justine completely.

Dolce: Bonjour Miss Henin-Hardenne.

Justine: Hey little dog ... I no more married.



The next passenger to enter the plane is Serena, with her AO trophy.

Elena: Hello Miss Williams. We have full flight today, so you cannot bring your trophy onto the plane. You must check it.

Serena: Oh yeah? I am a ten time GS champ so someone like you can't tell me what to do. I am bringing this trophy on the flight and I want an extra seat to put the trophy.

Elena: But but it is a full flight.

Serena gives Elena mean stare.

Elena: OK let me see, your assiged seat is 1B.

Serena walks to 1B, sees Justine in 1A, Dolce in 1B and Maria in 1C.

Serena: Hey why is there a talking dog in my seat? Also I don't want to sit down in between this skinny Belgian that I just beat down and this Russian giant.

Elena: Sorry but it is a full flight and 1B is your assigned seat. Miss Sharapova, can you please move your pet.

Maria moves Dolce to 1D. Serena sits down in disgust between Justine and Maria. Serena puts her trophy on her lap. Puts elbows on her armrests, knocking out Justine's elbow and Maria's elbow, which was there before.



The next passenger to enter the plane is Na.

Elena (looks at Na's boarding pass): Hello Miss NA-GOAT.

Na: You can call me Na. I use NA-GOAT only on internet, like when I buy plane ticket online and when I post on tennisforum.

Elena: Oh OK. You are a poster on tennisforum? Me too - I am miffedmax. Your seat is 1D.

Na: Why is there a talking dog on my seat.

Elena: Excue me, Miss Sharapova, please put your dog on your lap.

Maria give Elena mean stare but puts Dolce on her lap.

Dolce: Ni Hao Miss Na.

Na: Little dog. First I am married so Mrs. not Miss. Then I am Chinese so my last name is Li, not Na.

Dolce: Oh Ni Hao Mrs. Li.

Na: That better.


The flight takes off, with Justine, Serena (with trophy), Maria (with Dolce) and Na sit next each other.

Elena: Hello Miss Henin. What would you like for dinner?

Justine: Chicken

Elena: Hello Miss Williams. What would you like for dinner?

Serena: Cheeseburger

Elena: Hello Miss Sharapova. What would you like for dinner?

Maria: Salad. I am going to the bathroom.

Maria get up, leaving Dolce on her seat.

Elena: Hello Miss Li. What would you like for dinner?

Na: Well I in Australia 2 weeks and I miss Chinese food. So I would like some Chinese.

Elena: But we don't have Chinese on the flight.

Na: Well I still want Chinese.

Serena: Na, don't you Chinese eat dog?

Na: Yes we do. Why?

Serena looks at Dolce. Na and Serena exchange laugh. Serena grabs Dolce, puts some tape from her leg onto Dolce mouth and puts Dolce in her trophy.

Dolce: but nobody can hear her

Serena: Hey Elena, take this dog and make Na dinner.

Elena takes Serena's trophy with Dolce inside an goes to kitchen.

Maria returns and looks around.

Maria: Where is Dolce?

Serena: Oh I don't know. I think she wonder around.

Na: I think Dolce went for walk

Maria runs around plane look for Dolce.


Suddenly the plane is shaking. Everyone is screaming, think plane is going to crash.

Elena: Mother, please get this plane under control.

Vera: I try but I think we are being hijack by another plane.

Suddenly the door opens and in walks a blond man. He enters the front and throws Vera out. He drive the plane now.



Then enters three blond girls, with guns, Aga and Ula Radwanska, and their leader Caro Wozniacki.

Caro stand in front of plane with her gun. Aga to one side and Ula to other side.

Caro: Attention everyone. This Dementieva Airlines flight has been hijacked by Pusher Airlines. My father is now driving the flight. Everybody do as I say, or else you will pay the price.

Aga: My sister Ula and are the loyal servant of our friend Caro. Our goal is to have Pusher tennis take over the WTA and for our leader Caro to rise to WTA #1.

Caro: OK everyone listen. I know you are all better tennis players than us pusher, with bigger weapons. But the big weapon era of tennis is over and now is era of pushers. The US Open last year was just beginning. From now on, you must let me win all WTA events with my push style of tennis.

Caro pushes down the beverage cart. Miss Williams, what would you like to drink?

Serena, Na, Elena, Justine and Maria look each other and try to decide how they will save the WTA ...

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post #2 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:00 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

ehhh...I'll give a C for effort. The start was promising with Justine

Venus Ebone Starr


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post #3 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:19 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

quite funny
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post #4 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:23 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

That's actually pretty good.

A single flow'r he sent me, since we met./All tenderly his messenger he chose;
Deep-hearted, pure, with scented dew still wet - One perfect rose.
I knew the language of the floweret;/'My fragile leaves,' it said, 'his heart enclose.'
Love long has taken for his amulet/One perfect rose.
Why is it no one ever sent me yet/One perfect limousine, do you suppose?
Ah no, it's always just my luck to get/One perfect rose.
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post #5 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:26 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Your better at doing chris norris on the forum..

but i snapped at this sentence

Caro: Attention everyone. This Dementieva Airlines flight has been hijacked by Pusher Airlines. My father is now driving the flight. Everybody do as I say, or else you will pay the price.
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post #6 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:37 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aryman3 View Post
quite funny
Quote:
Originally Posted by moby View Post
That's actually pretty good.

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XWTA Golden Flower GOATs - Duan Han Liu Lu Peng Wang Xu Yang Zhang Zheng Zhu
XWTA Non-Chinese Faves - Crawford Ivanovic Kvitova Muguruza Riley
Tennis Tipping GOATs - HAOCHEN-GOAT SAISAI-GOAT, Doubles Champs XWTA Wuhan P5 900
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post #7 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:38 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfy View Post
Your better at doing chris norris on the forum..

but i snapped at this sentence

Caro: Attention everyone. This Dementieva Airlines flight has been hijacked by Pusher Airlines. My father is now driving the flight. Everybody do as I say, or else you will pay the price.
what is snap

XWTA GOATs - Henin Li Pierce
XWTA Golden Flower GOATs - Duan Han Liu Lu Peng Wang Xu Yang Zhang Zheng Zhu
XWTA Non-Chinese Faves - Crawford Ivanovic Kvitova Muguruza Riley
Tennis Tipping GOATs - HAOCHEN-GOAT SAISAI-GOAT, Doubles Champs XWTA Wuhan P5 900
Tennis Tipping Faves - AdeyC Adrian. Blackeagle catgamer chingching danieln1 Effy Frederik Javi joe87 Kəv kfh_9118 Kirilenko-Fan Meelis Michael! M.P goOudinUSA
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post #8 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 07:46 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

That was almost funny.

Maria Sharapova
wim 04 / uso 06 / ao 08 / rg 12 / rg 14
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post #9 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 08:01 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

It was funny, especially the Justine part!!!
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post #10 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 08:28 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Quote:
Originally Posted by Adal. View Post
That was almost funny.
Almost makes the difference.

Ana Ivanović.
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post #11 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 08:32 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Pusher Airline

SINOBUZ 八段目指

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post #12 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 08:32 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

I know the pretender is never gonna be as good as the original, but this is beyond pathetic...

Facts are merely opinions and opinions could be wrong.
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post #13 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 08:35 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

I miss Elena Bangs
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post #14 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 09:01 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Quote:
Originally Posted by Adal. View Post
That was almost funny.
brandy said that almost doesn't count



miffedmax needs to do one. It's been too long

Sharapova | Jankovic | Pavlyuchenkova

“They are definitely a good example of how local communities can overcome the ‘victim syndrome,’ take greater control over their lives and build productive futures for themselves,” Ms. Sharapova said - UN Goodwill Ambassador
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post #15 of 31 (permalink) Old Jan 30th, 2010, 09:14 PM
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Re: Last Flight Out of Australia

Maybe it was funny in Chinese.

Doing the East Riding proud since 2001

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