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post #1 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 05:17 AM Thread Starter
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Funny Quotes

Venus Williams on speculation that her father orchestrates results when she plays her sister: "It's not a true opinion at all."

Asked what she would say to President Bush about plans to scale back Title IX -- the legislation that greased the skids for a woman's ability to make millions as a professional athlete -- Capriati responded: "I have no idea what Title IX is, sorry."

"I'm not here to talk about my personal life, I'm here to talk about bras."
Anna Kournikova

After winning a marathon five-setter over Carlos Moya at the U.S. Open, Todd Martin was asked, "Where are you physically?" Martin responded: "Physically? I'm right here. Do you want to know where I am metaphysically?"

In a Wimbledon match against Sargis Sargisian, Sampras drew the ire of the Centre Court crowd when he jokingly asked the ballboy if he wanted to fetch a ball that had landed in Sampras' shorts.

Asked during the Australian Open what she knew about the host country, Venus Williams responded: "Australia was started as a penal colony in the beginning. They went on to become patriotic Australians, got their own accent, moved away from the British and here we are."

Alexandra Stevenson, after her first-round Wimbledon win over Tathiana Garbin: "Girls here are pretty strategical."

After losing to Monica Seles in the quarterfinals of the San Diego event, Capriati complained that she was affected by Seles' voluble grunting. "It wasn't so much the noise as it was the decimals," Capriati said.

Richard Williams on the pressures of being a tennis father: "I think I could really capitalize off Venus and Serena if I had more time. But I really do not because I do a lot of work for the Chinese peoples and the Japanese peoples and so on, representing them. As a matter of fact, we thinking now about buying Rockefeller Center for $39 billion so I don't have time to think about tennis no more."

Martina Hingis to Lindsay Davenport "Do you want me to serve or do you want me to break you"
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post #2 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 05:29 AM
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During an autograph session in Memphis a kid asked Kournikova if she liked it here and Anna said "Nashville is a beautiful city." Followed by bad noises and groans from the crowd. Memphis and Nashville dont get along.

fuck.
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post #3 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 05:37 AM
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Richard Williams on the pressures of being a tennis father: "I think I could really capitalize off Venus and Serena if I had more time. But I really do not because I do a lot of work for the Chinese peoples and the Japanese peoples and so on, representing them. As a matter of fact, we thinking now about buying Rockefeller Center for $39 billion so I don't have time to think about tennis no more."


he is a character boy! too funny! Richard is amazing, great quote. lmao
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post #4 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 05:38 AM
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decimals for decibels ? Jenny , Jenny
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post #5 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 06:25 AM
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$39 billion!! hahaha.

that guy is hilarious. people like him add flovor to the sport.

be urself richard.

I'm not young enough to know everything.
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post #6 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 09:47 AM
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These are my favourite quotes:

"We've got hundreds of kids like her back home."
(Tracy Austin on young Steffi Graf, press conference Filderstadt 1982)

"It's a faster, more athletic game. She is old now. ... Her time has passed."
(Martina Hingis on Steffi Graf in the July 1998 issue of "Tennis")
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post #7 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:25 AM
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"Reading the newspapers, there's nothing I'm going to learn new about myself, because I know what I said, and you know, I don't need to read what I said, 'cause I know what I said. I like to look at the pictures."
-- 17-year-old Maria Sharapova
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post #8 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:31 AM
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Anna Kournikova: "We are not just tennis players, we are superstars".
(She kept a straight face too).
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post #9 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:42 AM
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Martina Navratilova: "I'm not promising anything. I said 2004 was my last year and I lied so I'm not saying any more about the future."
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post #10 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:47 AM
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there are so many good bush quotes.....don't know where to begin.
the thought of the most powerful man talking like this makes me howl.


"And so during these holiday seasons, we thank our blessings." —George W. Bush, Fort Belvoir, Va., Dec. 10, 2004

"I cut the taxes on everybody. I didn't cut them. The Congress cut them. I asked them to cut them." —George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004

"We stand for things." —George W. Bush, Davenport, Iowa, Aug. 5, 2004

"It is white." —after being asked by a child in Britain what the White House was like, July 19, 2001

I'm not young enough to know everything.
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post #11 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:49 AM
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“When Serena was ten she was the only girl in the academy that used to play tag with a closed fist.” -Rick Macci (tennis coach)

“I’ve never played in an audience that wasn’t for me. The day will come and I’ll be prepared.” -Venus

Venus should go straight to the Hall of Fame. She’s going to be there anyway, so why waste time?” -Richard Williams

"How would she know what it’s like to be number one?" -Steffi Graf (After comments from Gabriela Sabatini who said Steffi lost the confidience of being #1)

“If I had to do it over. I wouldn’t put them in tennis.” - Richard Williams

“I’m not Venus Williams. I’m not Serena Williams. I’m feminine. I don’t want to look like they do. I’m not masculine like they are.” - Anna K (this was during her spiteful days...)

“I watched Serena and Venus play, and they’re not that good. They’ve been given more attention than me and they don’t know how to play points..." - Anna K (the things we say when we're young and don't know any better)

“I used to want to be like John McEnroe. I wanted to be like him as a person. That controversy was very exciting for me back then.” - Serena Williams (who was nicknamed ‘Serena Blackenroe Williams” as a kid)

STEFWHIT'S HALL OF FAME
Greatest Singles Player of All Time: Steffi Graf
Simply the BEST: Serena Williams [Proud MEMBER OF RENA'S ARMY]
The REAL GOAT Rafael Nadal
Future Inductees: Clijsters, C.Evert, A.Agassi, A.Berasategui, N. Zvereva, I.Majoli, M.Safin, Li Na, VIKA, and Del Potro
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post #12 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 10:54 AM
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one more..


"See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don't attack each other. Free nations don't develop weapons of mass destruction." —Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003

I'm not young enough to know everything.
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post #13 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 11:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kunal
there are so many good bush quotes.....don't know where to begin.
...
Why not here:

"Our nation's founding commitment is still our deepest commitment: In our world, and here at home, we will extend the frontiers of freedom."

"The terrorists are fighting freedom with all their cunning and cruelty because freedom is their greatest fear. And they should be afraid, because freedom is on the march."

"If America shows uncertainty or weakness in this decade, the world will drift toward tragedy.
This will not happen on my watch."

"Three days after September the 11th, I stood where Americans died, in the ruins of the twin towers. Workers in hard hats were shouting to me, 'Whatever it takes.' A fellow grabbed me by the arm, and he said, 'Do not let me down.' ... I will never relent in defending America -- whatever it takes."
"The liberation of Iraq was good for the Iraqi people, good for America, and good for the world."

"Ronald Reagan won America's respect with his greatness and won its love with his goodness. He had the confidence that comes with conviction, the strength that comes with character, the grace that comes with humility and the humor that comes with wisdom."

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post #14 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 11:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tennis aus
Asked during the Australian Open what she knew about the host country, Venus Williams responded: "Australia was started as a penal colony in the beginning. They went on to become patriotic Australians, got their own accent, moved away from the British and here we are."
So smart!!!!

Quote:
Richard Williams on the pressures of being a tennis father: "I think I could really capitalize off Venus and Serena if I had more time. But I really do not because I do a lot of work for the Chinese peoples and the Japanese peoples and so on, representing them. As a matter of fact, we thinking now about buying Rockefeller Center for $39 billion so I don't have time to think about tennis no more."
Legend!!!!

Quote:
“I’m not Venus Williams. I’m not Serena Williams. I’m feminine. I don’t want to look like they do. I’m not masculine like they are.” - Anna K (this was during her spiteful days...)
F-ing bitch! Just cos she never won anything, or never beat the sisters is not there fault, they were just sooooooo much better than her.

Quote:
Venus should go straight to the Hall of Fame. She’s going to be there anyway, so why waste time?” -Richard Williams
so true, so true!
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post #15 of 84 (permalink) Old Oct 27th, 2005, 11:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Stefwhit
“If I had to do it over. I wouldn’t put them in tennis.” - Richard Williams
That's funny
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