The 2005 US Open drinking game - TennisForum.com
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post #1 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 12:35 AM Thread Starter
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The 2005 US Open drinking game

Yay, it's time for another Grand Slam drinking game. Take a sip of your favorite beverage, everytime.....

-a commentator calls Nadal's pants "Clamdingers"
-Roger Federer is compared to Pete Sampras
-Highlights of the Pete barf match are shown
-Highlights of Connor's 1991 USO run are shown
-during rain delays, the Connors/Krickstein, Sampras/Agassi 2001 qf or the 2004 JCap/Serena qf are shown
-the Steffi/Andre, Taylor/"Jaden Gil", or the Sharapova commercials are shown
-the commentators compare a player's grunting to Seles'
-the commentators talk about their playing days


John McEnroe....
-says they need to go back to wood racquets
-says the season is too long
-pronounces Justine's last name incorrectly

Mary Carillo....
-says a players "needs to" do something
-says something negative about the Williams sisters
-uses a big word that nobody, including herself understands
-says "big babe"
-reminds the audience that Amelie Mauresmo is a lesbian
-makes a REALLY bad pun
-sounds so manly that a relative or friend asks if she is a man

"I resolve to get arrested for indecent exposure," Mary Lynn Rajskub (Chloe on 24).
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post #2 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 12:40 AM
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I'll set up a tent IN the liquor store because we'll all be too drunk to drive to get any more liquor!

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post #3 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 12:53 AM
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additional.....a commentator:
compares Sharapova to Kournakova BUT then notes that sharapova dislikes it.
talks about the williams beads incident.
changes there mind on who is going to win the match in the space of 1 or 2 points.
rechanges there mind back to there original choice.
AND here in AUS... flash to Bec cartwright during LLeytons match.
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post #4 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 12:59 AM
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-everytime Dick Enberg says "oh my!!" (we'll all have alcohol poisoning!!)
-everytime Mary C.'s laugh is annoying or sounds like a man
-everytime that the commentators dismiss that Lindsay is really no.1 and call Maria no.1
-everytime that the commentators bring up Serena or Venus' other activities
-everytime that the subject of the Williams sister's supposed decline is brought up
-everytime that a commentator says that Lindsay should've won both the Oz and Wimbledon.
-everytime that the Williams sister's technique is brought up



THIS COULD GO ON AND ON!!
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post #5 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:03 AM
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Everytime they talk about andre and steffi planning to play mixed doubles together.

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post #6 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:23 AM
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Everytime they say "Kim is the favorite"
Everytime they mention Maria Sharapova when ANOTHER match is going on
Everytime they say "Maria is only 18."

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Serena "Making Threats" Williams
Venus "Always Injured" Williams
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post #7 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Dog
-everytime that the commentators dismiss that Lindsay is really no.1 and call Maria no.1
Do you suppose they would refer to Maria as Wimbledon Champion, without saying the 2004.

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post #8 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:28 AM
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Quote:
-sounds so manly that a relative or friend asks if she is a man
My mom always does that!!!!!!!!

also add

-everytime the US Networks (USA and CBS) show some stupid american match when there's a hell of a match (albeit without any americans) going on elswhere
-all of the above plus the fact that they have the nerve to give you updates on the match they are not showing just to torment you!
-all of the first one except they don't give you updates so you have to log onto usopen.org and then the IBM realtime scoreboard doesn't show up
-If they put Donald Young on Ashe

PAW WTA GRAND SLAM RECORD:
Australian Open 2005-R32

PAW ATP GRAND SLAM RECORD:
Australian Open 2005-SF
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post #9 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:32 AM
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Everytime the commentators say that Lindsay's back is the reason she lost the Wimbledon final...not the fact that Venus played better when it mattered..

*Everytime Patrick Mcenroe says "HELLO" meaning of course after every winner or says "the dropper" in that damn annoying way...

*I agree about the Sharapova/Wimbledon thing. That's the only way that Cliff Drysdale can remember who she is I think, he can't say her name w/o 'the wimbledon champ' attached

*If MJ Fernandez is commentating, every time she says something is someones 'bread and butter' esp. when talking about Lindsay Davenport...every one of her shots is her 'bread and butter' apparantly

*Every time B. Gilbert is wearing black... talk about gettin wasted in a matter of seconds.

*Every time M. Carillo brings up the WS off court activities... double the shot if neither is playing
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post #10 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:39 AM
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I just laugh my ass off, when a match will be going on like Mauresmo and JHH, just say. Then one of them will be like

Did you see what Maria Sharapova did yesterday?
No! What!!??
She was walkin her dog!
Na ah!
Oh yes, I saw it in person.
*Meanwhile the match that is going on, just finished and it is like a the final of a Grand Slam or something.*
hahaha

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post #11 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ILuvVenus07
Do you suppose they would refer to Maria as Wimbledon Champion, without saying the 2004.
They will always know Maria is wimby champ, but in what year? 1995-2005?

Dementia
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post #12 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:43 AM
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I think I'm going to need more vodka for this
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post #13 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 01:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyS
Yay, it's time for another Grand Slam drinking game. Take a sip of your favorite beverage, everytime.....

-a commentator calls Nadal's pants "Clamdingers"
-Roger Federer is compared to Pete Sampras
-Highlights of the Pete barf match are shown
-Highlights of Connor's 1991 USO run are shown
-during rain delays, the Connors/Krickstein, Sampras/Agassi 2001 qf or the 2004 JCap/Serena qf are shown
-the Steffi/Andre, Taylor/"Jaden Gil", or the Sharapova commercials are shown
-the commentators compare a player's grunting to Seles'
-the commentators talk about their playing days


John McEnroe....
-says they need to go back to wood racquets
-says the season is too long
-pronounces Justine's last name incorrectly

Mary Carillo....
-says a players "needs to" do something
-says something negative about the Williams sisters
-uses a big word that nobody, including herself understands
-says "big babe"
-reminds the audience that Amelie Mauresmo is a lesbian
-makes a REALLY bad pun
-sounds so manly that a relative or friend asks if she is a man
I don't think I will be alive anymore after this tournament

Jelena Jankovic
Official Pre Match Hair & Make-Up Artist of the Jelena Clinic


+Serena Williams+Mary Pierce+Christina McHale+
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post #14 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 02:00 AM
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drink if...
-they show roddick, agassi or federer in a blow out instead of a close women's match
-tracy austin says "under her belt"
-john mcenroe shows up late
-justine says "allez", lleyton says "c'mon", or nadal says "vamos"
-kim does the splits

It will always be Arantxa, hall of famer! and martina hingis and kim clijsters - amazing legends
ana ivanovic and the italian girls, especially pennetta (forza azzurre! RG CHAMP FRANCESCA AND FINALIST SARA!)
aga, vika, sam, na in the next tier
NEVER say "I don't care who wins, I just want good tennis"
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post #15 of 35 (permalink) Old Aug 28th, 2005, 02:13 AM
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Drink if...

...Serena yells at herself! haha, we will all be drunk after that!

Supporting:
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